Just Focus
by Autumn810
Summary: A girl with a strange affinity for magic long before her branding, Amarhi Raines finds herself swept up in the tides of the Purge when her family takes a vacation to New Bodhum. Now a l'Cie, she struggles to find the path to completing her focus all while dealing with Hope's cowardice. No fal'Cie can tell her how her story should go.
1. Prologue

Twisted tendrils of glittering blue light stretched toward the endless mass of stars that separated land from sky. Towering creatures turned their tired eyes to the dancing ribbons as they extended from all directions across Gran Pulse and twined together, forming a pillar of light that cast a brilliant glow across the wild grasslands. Slowly, the tendrils bunched together, rippling and curling as they reconstructed the form of life that had been missing from the world below for far too many years.

The excess spirit of the fal'Cie poured into the creation of this new being, a collaboration of powers that morphed into the figure of a human infant, a rather delicate creature. With a final rush of energy, the beam of light shot up into the sky before vanishing altogether in a magnificent show of sparks, taking the child with it.

On the doorstep of an unsuspecting, perfectly content family lay an infant bundled in gray cloth. She appeared no older than a few months, but she stared at her hands in startled awe as if she'd never seen them before. In fact, everything from the lamp above the front door to the pebbles beside her face brought marveling wonder to her pale eyes. For the first time, she saw. Fortunately, the night was not cold. Unfortunately, the infant had yet to eat.

It was the angry wails that brought Amita Raines to the door. It was the startled scream that brought her husband, Patrus. It was the immediate adoration in their children's eyes that led them to keep the girl and raise her as their own for the fourteen years they had left.

~Bodhum, Day 11~

"Would you look at that!" my father cries, pointing toward the translucent bubble that shields us from the spray of the fireworks that burst over the sea. My mother squeals in delight, clapping her hands together excitedly with the rest of the gathering crowd.

"Beautiful!" She rests a hand on my shoulder, smiling down at me with happiness written clear across her face. Her eyes are bright for the first time in years. "Isn't it, dear?"

"It's something," I nod, turning back toward the firework show. Glittering sprays of blue and orange litter the night sky, dancing with the twinkling stars. Tonight's a seasonal celebration that takes place in Bodhum every year. Once, my parents took my brother; once they went by themselves; they took my sister twice, and now they're taking _me_ in their biggest efforts to lift my long-fallen spirits. I've never been one for parties.

I look around at the bright, smiling faces, each flashing with the dazzling colors of the fireworks. Soldiers, children, bartenders... Each has their own way of relishing the festivities. A father and his son fight playfully. A woman stares out at the sea with silent pleas pooling in her eyes. A group of young friends laughs, shoving each other playfully.

The sand underneath my shoes shifts and I look up at my parents once more. A pair of devoted lovers pressed together by the promise of a picture-perfect family. From what they tell me, my unexpected arrival was less than unwelcome in the midst of their longing for a third child. Even now, after everything that's happened... After how they've _hurt_ us... Sighing, I glance once more at the night sky before turning away. I'm still grateful. I'm just... _lonely_.

"Amarhi, where are you going?" Amita asks, her voice overflowing with motherly concern; I shrug, continuing my walk back to the room we rented at the nearby bar. We can't afford much now that my brother's moved out, so this beachside trip really _is_ a treat. I just can't take the forced joy anymore. Not while he's gone, maybe even for good this time. _Just like Cassie._

I push past the people drinking in the tiki bar and open the slatted wooden door to our room. Kicking off my black boots, I fall into bed and roll up in the rough, patchy covers. Through the open window, I can hear cheers and the explosions of the fireworks. Colored light flickers on the wall across from me. Huffing, I pull the covers over my head. Outside, guards mutter amongst themselves. I catch mentions of Pulse and fal'Cie before drifting off into restless sleep. My dreams are filled with ebony hair and glimmering gray eyes. _Why did you go?_

I jolt as a sudden crash snaps me out of my restless sleep. In the darkness of the room my family rented, beams of light flash about, blinding me. I raise an arm to shield my face, squinting, and sit upright. Muffled shouting and heavy footsteps echo through my foggy head. Suddenly, I get it. _This is the Sanctum_. My mother screams and clings to my father, who stares wide-eyed at the soldiers that fill our room and point their weapons at our heads.

"Get up!" one of them commands. "Slowly. Keep your hands where we can see them."

"What's going on?" my father demands, quickly obeying.

"No questions."

"You can't take them without telling us _why!"_ I protest, the wood floor beneath my feet creaking as I stand, hands held up by my head.

"Shut it!" another soldier snaps, shuffling closer and waving his weapon about in my face. "To the door, _now._ "

"Why?!"

"I'd keep my mouth shut, young lady," the first man shouts, gesturing to my mother with his gun. His helmeted head turns up to face his comrades. "You two, keep her here. The rest of us will take care of these ones."

"What are you doing?!" I demand, trying to force my way past the soldier block my path as my parents are led out of the room.

"Hey!" he shoves me back. "Captain, what do we do about this one? She'll cause problems on the train." Their captain chuckles, shaking his head and leveling his gun with my mother's temple.

"No, I don't think she will."


	2. The Purge

The train rattles along its suspended tracks, each thrum rumbling through my body like the guttural growl of a feral dog. The massive, loose cloth of my Purge robe covers every inch of me, likely so the PSICOM agents on board don't have to see our faces as they send us off to our graves. _Pulse..._ It's a death sentence. To clear Cocoon of all Pulse influence, the government decided to ship everyone that was in Bodhum away. Something about _cleaning the populace._ Personally _,_ I don't buy it.

Speed picks up as we continue around a corner, the train car dim and lit only with the dull blue glow emitting from specific portions of our robes, patterns like barcodes. _Pulse_... Will I survive? Will all that "wasted time" training with my brother even come into effect before I'm ripped to pieces? Pulse has always been painted as a vicious land of vicious beasts and vicious people for as long as I've been alive.

I'm broken from my thoughts as the train rocks to the side, trembling. There's a loud shatter from the front and I clutch my hands together, lifting my head to search the room. The other passengers look just as anxious. The door to the car slides open and a PSICOM guard leaves in a rush. Taking a deep breath, I try to pull against the restraints pinning me to my seat. Nothing gives. Suddenly, a sharp burst of electricity shocks the belt on my stomach, releases the magnetic hold on my sleeves, and the restraints fly free. The others in the car cheer, scrambling to their feet.

Before I can follow suit, the train screeches to a halt. Gritting my teeth, I cling to the seats tightly as my shoulder slams into the train wall. I can feel that we're airborne, tumbling, falling, crashing, but I can't do anything about it. Dazed, I let go once the train finally skids to a stop and stumble across the smooth floor. Someone lays on the ground to my right; I turn away from the puddle of warm, dark blood that flows onto the floor around them. Pushing through the crowd of strangers, I peer out of the torn side of the train.

The city above is distinctly emerald in color, connected by tangled railways and illuminated dim lights. It's a military base of sorts. _But why would we be here? More security?_ Gunfire erupts outside and several roads collapse altogether in a series of fiery explosions. My heart pounds in my chest and my hands tremble as I clutch the side of the train. _A resistance..._

"C'mon, get out!" a gruff voice calls. A tall, bulky man stands in an open doorway, resting a gun on his bulky his shoulder. His bright orange hair is the first detail to catch my attention. His enormous muscles are the second. "We're holding down the fort out there!"

With mixed murmurs and fearful gazes, people dressed for the Purge filter out of the demolished train one by one. Outside, some even shed their robes. I stay enveloped in mine, nodding my thanks to the big man when he takes my hand and helps me down. Uneasy, I peer over the edge of the road we stand on, watching the people below fire guns and tumble to their deaths. It's nice to be saved from Pulse, but this fight already bears far too many casualties. A voice blasts out over the chaos through an intercom system.

"On behalf of Cocoon's citizens, I would like to thank our brave Pulse pioneers and express our best wishes for a successful relocation. Your noble and selfless sacrifice ensures the continued safety and peace of our society. Were it not for this remarkable gesture, every resident of Cocoon, your family, your friends, your neighbors... would be exposed to the dangers of the world below. By choosing to leave Cocoon and participating in this migration—"

A tall man in a tawny trench coat stops the sickening broadcast with a single stomp of his boot, his pale eyes sharp and snide as he overlooks the lot of us. He and a blue-haired boy converse as I turn back to scan over the wary crowd. Countless aircrafts fly overhead, ready to rain destruction on our heads if the need should come. The man heads toward where I stand with the rest of this anxious crowd, a cluster of disciples in tow.

I turn back to the destruction erupting before me. Why are they _murdering_ the very people they were intent on sending away "for the sake of Cocoon?" What about the Purge? It doesn't add up. I shake my head, toying with the baggy sleeves on my arms. The crowd begins to gather in a cluster as the man and his party arrive, wielding guns and carrying plenty of extras. _These ruffians want civilians involved, too?_ I stand in the back line of the others, arms crossed tightly over my chest. The man in the trench coat, towering high above the rest of us, scans over the crowd with clear pride, tucking a strand of blonde hair back under his tight black cap.

"You all okay?" he asks, voice gentler than I expected. A boy about my age stumbles behind him, a pile of loaded guns skittering across the pavement. I cringe, expecting a bullet to pierce my skull at any moment. "Hey, careful with those," the man grits, though his smile is playful as if he's looking down at a younger brother. He turns to us once more.

"Don't worry, no one's moving to Pulse today. We'll clear you a path outta here, so be ready to—"

"Wait!" A bearded man protests, leaping to his feet. "Let me fight with you!"

"Yeah, you can't expect us to just sit here!" another shouts. The man in the trench coat turns to the orange-haired giant who helped us off the train.

"Could help."

"Yep."

"Please," the bearded man begs, stepping closer. "Let us help." Another explosion sets off in the distance and the people around me grow uneasy.

"Okay then," Trench Coat gives in. "Volunteers front and center."

Men and women alike flood toward the man, taking up guns cautiously and waiting for his direction. Even a mother, tearing herself away from her robed son, takes up arms, nodding her affirmation to the leader when he questions her decision. The orange-haired man hands the last gun to Trench Coat, who takes it and nears us.

"Alright, last one. Somebody take it." He lowers it to a boy seated on the ground, who scrambles away with wide eyes, panicked. It's the same boy whose mother volunteered to fight, I note.

"N-no... I can't."

"Here!" a girl says, throwing her arms open wide and kneeling before the blonde. Sighing, he hands it over. The girl turns the firearm over and over in her hands, grinning like a fool.

"Push comes to shove, keep 'em safe," Trench Coat says warmly, winking.

"Bang!" the girl replies, pretending to shoot him. They laugh it off and Trench Coat leaves, leading his new battalion down the road. My stomach turns uneasily.

I sigh, pacing the tracks restlessly as the others fight their way through troops. The people who escaped scatter about this secured section, talking hopelessly with each other. Several more take off their robes, freed from the Purge's grasp on them. Tired of their weight, I follow suit, tugging on my bunched shorts and stretching my arms over my head. If I'm to die here, I might as well die free from PSICOM control. I shudder; the thought makes me sick.

I come to a stop behind the boy whose mother left, watching as he leans against the railing of the bridge, clutching it so tightly that his knuckles turn white. His face is obscured by the robe's hood, though I can tell he's anxious. I can see the group that left from here, along with the sparks of gunfire and the people who fail to survive their wounds. From above, the forces drop a gargantuan beast of glimmering white and green skin; I hold my breath.

It claws through the fighters as if they're nothing but insects. Trench Coat and his two supporters fire at the behemoth until it collapses, fallen. Energized, the others push on, firing at the remaining PSICOM soldiers. The fighting stops when an enormous warship pulls out in front of them, raining down bullets that instantly kill all those without cover.

Trench Coat dives across the tracks, reaching for a gun only to miss. Instead of getting up, however, he lays there helplessly. My fists clench at my sides and suddenly I find myself standing beside the boy and gripping the railing just as he is. As the ship readies to fire on the rebel, a rocket bursts into the ship's hull, causing a chain explosion. The mother of the boy drops her launcher and pulls Trench Coat to his feet. _Careful._ A sudden burst from the ship explodes into a fiery blast behind them. The smoke and the fire obstruct my view as the track collapses, dumping countless soldiers and rebels alike into the black abyss below. My heart skips a beat. _What if that's how my parents met their end?_

"What's he _doing?"_ I hiss, leaning further out to see the man dangling over the edge and gripping the woman's wrist as she hangs over the edge. Seconds later, she goes limp, easily slipping from his grasp; my heart catches in my throat.

" _No!"_ screams the boy to my right, throwing out his trembling hand desperately.

With a panicked shout, Trench Coat, too, falls down, down, down. Only, he hits the ground safely. The boy's mother is long gone, and her son knows it, his breaths ragged as he stumbles away from the rail. The girl who took the last gun comes up on his other side, gently taking hold of his shoulder. Another blast comes from the side and the girl tugs on his hand.

"Come on!" The boy doesn't budge; my grip loosens on the railing. With a huff, the girl grabs his shoulders to straighten him and slaps him across the face. "We _have_ to move!"

"A-alright," the boy stammers, letting her drag him away. The end of the bridge rattles and I run after them, never one to sit still when my life's on the line. I can't face this alone, not with this buffoon as the leader of the resistance.

As we run back to the main group, a siren wails out, echoing through the massive spaces that surround us. I turn to see the skies start to pull open, revealing black trapdoors.

"Attention Purge deportees. Attention Purge deportees. Put down your weapons and surrender immediately. Your removal is the will of the people of Cocoon. Should you attempt to flee, the Sanctum will employ every resource necessary to bring you to justice." _And by that, you mean you'll kill us._ An enormous structure drops down through the open hole, the exact picture of a fal'Cie I remember studying in school. My heart falls to my feet. "This land is no longer your home. Cease hostilities and surrender at once."

The boy beside me sheds his robes and the girl follows suit, freeing her peachy orange pigtails from the hood and revealing her colorful, beaded attire. It's unlike anything I've ever seen-even her airy accent is something entirely unique. She flashes a bright smile, picking up the gun Trench Coat gave to her and walking toward us.

"Here," she says, shoving the weapon into the boy's hands. The spiked layers in his silver hair bounce as he shakes his head. Silently, she comes closer and wraps her thin arms around him. "It's too much, isn't it?" she coos, patting the back of his head. Quickly, she steps away with a determined nod. "Face it later."

"But..."

"Ciao!" she squeals, giggling as she runs away. Curious, I brush past the boy, shrugging when he frowns at me, and follow her. I can hear the thump of his shoes when he decides to do the same moments later.

"Hey! Wait!"


	3. The Pulse Fal'Cie

We come to an abrupt stop on the bridge upon seeing two hoverbikes coming in for a landing. The young crew that followed Trench Coat before raises their guns, only to lower them upon seeing their leader and the orange-haired man. The boy's demeanor changes almost immediately upon seeing the man who let his mother meet her early demise, his hands curling into fists and his eyes narrowing. I watch as the group gathers by their leader and laughs like nothing's happened. My stomach churns and I feel sick as the moment of hundreds of deaths flashes through my mind once more.

"That's the one," the boy mutters, staring long and hard at Trench Coat. The girl with the peach pigtails steps up, pale hands placed firmly on her hips.

"Didn't you have something to tell him?"

"Yeah," the boy nods. The girl smiles, sparing me a friendly glance before nodding firmly.

"Alright then!"

"But... I..." Panic flashes through the boy's silvery-green eyes and his hands tremble at his sides. The girl, with her eyebrows pinched sympathetically, leans forward to catch his attention.

"I'll go with you." She smiles at me. "We both will, right?" I nod, desperate to leave. Confused, the boy looks between the two of us.

"What?" There's a moment of hesitation before the girl giggles and shoves the boy so he stumbles forward.

"Go on!" He stops abruptly, overcome with fear. The girl and I exchange a worried glance. Huffing, she rests one hand on her hip and the other by her mouth, skipping ahead of the boy with a grin and giving a cheery shout of, "Hey!"

The engine on the bike roars to life and I jump, covering my ears quickly. A blast of dusty wind washes over us as the bike hovers, Trench Coat calling something down before speeding off toward the hanging Pulse Vestige in the distance. I huff, dropping my hands. _We were too late._ I turn to the boy, watching a flash of defeated irritation flash over his face as the girl protests, stomping a heeled boot on the ground.

"Hey! Come back!" She runs toward the second bike, pushing past the dispersing followers of Trench Coat. I shake my head, turning to face the boy and cocking my head to the side to offer a slight smile.

"Wanna go see what she's up to? Nothing good, I bet, but she could help us out."

"I guess," he mutters.

We head toward the girl. I'm overcome with curiosity as she runs her hands over the smooth white shell of the second hoverbike the orange-haired man left behind. Thoughtfully, she rests her chin between her finger and her thumb, bright green eyes narrowed as she stares at the machine. She seems to snap out of a trance upon seeing the boy.

"Hm? You okay?"

"I want to tell him, it's just that—" The boy's voice fades and he shakes his head, eyes falling to the pavement as he steadies his wavering balance by clutching her arm. A grin flashes across her face.

"Say... You know how to fly this?" she asks, pointing at the bike. The boy shrugs, his voice quiet.

"Yeah. I think so."

"Alright!" she squeals, laughing and grabbing his wrists. Enthusiastic as ever, she shoves him toward the bike. "In you go!" Quickly, she plops in behind him.

"Wait!" I huff, stumbling forward. "Were you just planning on leaving me behind?"

"Climb aboard!" she smiles, scooting closer to the boy's back to give me room behind her. It's a squeeze, but soon I find myself with a face full of bright hair and beaded jewelry. Laughing, she wraps her arms around the boy's waist.

"That way!"

"No, no..." he whispers, shaking his head. "If we go in there, that thing could... it could make us l'Cie. This is... I don't think I can—"

"You _can_ do it!" the girl insists, clutching the steering mechanism over his hands.

"What are you doing!?" comes a rather terrifying shout. I turn to see the orange-haired man sprinting toward us. Filled with new bravery, the boy starts the engine.

"Here we go!"

The vehicle takes off far too fast, spinning and dropping and rising faster than any vehicle I've ever ridden. Finally, the boy levels it out above the bridge, where the man below screams and waves his burly arms over his head.

"Get back here! Do you hear me?! Hey!"

Taking a deep breath, the boy takes off for the Pulse Vestige. The bike carries us quickly and smoothly, trembling only when the boy puts on the brakes to enter. He shakes his head just as our ride begins to lurch, puttering.

"I don't know how to land!"

"Oh, just—!"

The girl jerks the controls and we hurtle towards the Vestige. I cling to the sides as we spin out of control, both of their screams echoing through the dark as we tumble inside, skidding across the floor. Somewhere along the way, I fall out onto the ground, rolling over and over and over. Landing finally on my stomach, I lay there for an eternity gathering my breath and gritting my teeth through the pain. Finally, I groan, pushing myself up. Hardly a foot away, the boy raises his head off our other companion's back, sitting up quickly as she stirs.

"Well, that was close," she breathes, standing and brushing her clothes off. "Now, where is the... Oops." She turns to see our only way out shattered against the wall. I sigh, shaking my head and crossing my arms. "Well then... Guess it's just us." She holds up her hands to form an odd symbol. I frown, turning to look over the room.

The place is full of stone pillars and glowing blue stripes, alien patterns of all kinds coating every surface. It all seems so... unfamiliar. Foreign. The very definition of Pulse.

"What did you expect?" the boy asks, still resting on his knees. "Even soldiers know not to go near the fal'Cie. You become a Pulse l'Cie, and you're finished." The girl huffs, resting her hands on her hips.

"What do you mean, ' _finished'_?"

"Haven't you heard, Miss...?"

"Vanille," she corrects promptly, leaning toward him with a pout.

"Huh?"

"My name. And yours?" She holds out a hand to help him up.

"Hope," he replies, taking it. In a surprising show of strength, Vanille drags Hope to his feet much easier than I thought she would've. "Thank you." They both turn to me expectantly.

"I'm Amarhi," I answer. Hope huffs, looking around at the room.

"What were we _thinking_?"

"Well, since we're here, let's look around!" Vanille suggests. I'm not entirely sure she heard his question.

We head up a broad set of smooth stairs, Vanille humming a joyful tune the whole way. I clutch my hands behind my back, aimlessly looking around the Vestige. Finally, I work up the courage to speak.

"So, Hope, where are you from?"

"Uh, Palumpolum," Hope replies, eyeing me uncomfortably as a relieved smile flashes across my face.

"Really? Me too. East side, though. You don't strike me as that, uh, _type_."

Before he can reply, Vanille cries out happily and skips toward a statue of twisted blue stone.

"Oh, check this out!"

"Hey!" Hope calls, running after her as she begins to climb. "Vanille! Where are you—"

She hops down, wielding a staff that splits off into two antler-like branches. Giggling, she swings it left and right, shining hooks flying from the top and swinging with her movements. "Well?" she demands, posing with the bizarre weapon.

"That's, uh..."

"Interesting," I finish as Hope's voice fades. "Cool, though."

Laughing, Vanille continues to swing it around and show off. I sigh, crossing my arms tightly. _I still have to find my parents_. My heart freezes when a growl echoes from nearby, a metallic thud ringing in my ears. I turn slowly to see one of the army's pets snarling at us, its red face gleaming under the blue lights striped through its body. Vanille rushes forward, wielding her new staff. Standing at her side, I pull my pair of curved daggers free from their sheathes at my sides. Giving in, Hope joins us with a bright blue and yellow boomerang in his hand.

Vanille is the first to strike, throwing the hooks from her staff at the creature and pulling them free. Hope's boomerang has surprising force behind it as it strikes the beast's shell. I hurry forward as it stumbles against the strike, quickly digging my daggers into its side and dragging upward, tearing through the mechanisms that I know lie beneath.

Its skin cuts like aluminum foil, wires sparking and dangling when I dive backward to avoid being clawed by its glowing blue talons. Vanille strikes again, her hooks snagging the loose wires and pulling. I leap back in to cut them free and bury both my knives into the hole in the side of the creature. Shuddering in its steps, it falters a second longer before collapsing on its side with a puff of smoke and a groan.

"Okay!" Vanille cheers, tucking her wand away into a pouch on her lower back. "Back to exploring!"

"Please don't go looking for trouble," Hope pleads, following at a slower pace as she runs off, hands swinging far out to the side as if this is a thrill to her. It probably is, judging by her bizarrely optimistic demeanor. Sighing, I chase after the strange girl, dodging the claws of more of the army's toys and shaking loose strands of hair out of my face as they come free.

The multicolored floor is perfectly polished and reflective, oddly enough, bouncing back my image as I kept up a quick pace through the Vestige. Part of me originally hoped that the army might have some information about my family and that, somehow, I could have squeezed it out of them. Now I see I was horribly wrong. The only way to go about this now is with my chin up and my shoulders squared. _We'll get out alright. What use would we be as l'Cie anyway? We're_ children. Still, the realization that no one can help me now is scary.

"Is that...?" Hope rushes over to a corner of the room. I turn to see another bike, exactly the same as the one we rode in. "That's his. Where is he?"

"He had to have come for some reason," I muse, eyeing the room. "I think there could be an exit... Over there?" I point to the left.

"Maybe," Vanille nods, taking off again. I sigh, rushing after her over a set of stairs and around another group of those creatures. Hope trails along, looking absolutely miserable. I can't really blame him. He lost his mother to a rag-tag rebellion less than an hour ago and now he's convinced he's in grave danger of becoming a Pulse l'Cie. As we near the door, Hope grows hesitant.

"Aren't you guys scared?"

"Not so much," Vanille replies simply.

"I'm only a _little_ nervous," I add with a shrug. He scoffs, slowing down.

"You really don't get it."

Vanille swivels around with a frown and puts her hands on her hips. Taking a deep breath, she begins to pace.

"Pulse fal'Cie and l'Cie are bad news. That's why Cocoon kicked them out. Live too close to the fal'Cie? One-way ticket to Pulse!" She turns to face us with a slight smile. "That's the Purge in a nutshell."

"If they catch us here, they'll Purge us too. And then—"

"Weren't they going to Purge us anyway?" I interrupt, tilting my head to the left. "We were on those trains. The only reason we're _here_ is because a group of bums blew everything up. If the Sanctum gets itself back in order, it doesn't matter who was here and who wasn't. _Everyone_ in the Hanging Edge will be Purged if they don't _kill_ us first."

"What's your problem?" Vanille demands.

"What's my...?! Pulse is _hell_ on _earth!"_ Hope exclaims, frustrated. Vanille hums, stepping forward to give Hope a hug.

"We'll be okay," she insists. "Calm down!"

"Get off me," Hope huffs, jerking away from her touch. Before anyone can react, a familiar voice echoes through the empty spaces of the Vestige.

" _Serah? Can you hear me? Where are you?"_ A few seconds ring silent. " _Hang on, baby! Your hero's on the way!"_

Hope glares up at the ceiling, searching for the sound of the voice. I shift my weight between my feet, picking at the tight material of my leggings uncomfortably as silence overtakes us. This mission to catch up to Trench Coat... It should be interesting, to say the least.


	4. Snowballing

As if on cue, four bright beams of light flash down from above and connect with resonators just above the floor, supplying power. Before the steep incline ahead rises a set of solid stairs matching the color of the floor. Patterned beams of white light flicker on the floor, lining up a path to a pair of sliding doors. Hope's eyes narrow.

"He _is_ here. Calling himself a hero…" His fists clench tighter and Vanille sighs, stepping up to his side with a bright smile.

"He's coming our way." The anger on the boy's face fades into fear and he turns to us sharply.

"What should I do?"

"Tell him what you have to," I reply, Vanille nodding earnestly at my side. Hope frowns, turning to face the stares.

"But nothing I say will change what happened."

Vanille sighs, resting her jaw in the palm of her slender hand.

"We _could_ just run away," she suggests finally. Hope glances up at her, looks over at me, and nods.

"Yeah, let's run."

We hurry toward the stairs that folded down and rush past a cluster of small red robots. The doors the lights lead to slide open. We only hesitate a moment before running into the dark hallway. Vanille rushes ahead, giggling when the next set of doors opens for her.

"Do you even know where you're going?!" Hope calls, breathless as he quickens his pace. I toss a look at him over my shoulder.

"I don't think she _cares._ "

We follow her to the next set of steep patterned stairs, Vanille slowing on the incline and allowing me and the breathless boy at my side to catch up. The floor changes to a design of yellow and blue tiles, twisting into paths that head off in three directions. The room is far more expansive than the one we entered through. Hope looks around the room with wide eyes.

"Whoa," he breathes, clutching his gloved hands together.

Just as I take a breath to speak, a horrific, raspy shriek rattles from the doorway to our left. The door flies open wide and a mass of shuddering blue and violet creatures stumble toward us. The three of us press together tighter as the door to the right raises and the monsters hiss and howl and scream, flailing unrecognizable limbs of gnarled flesh and staggering in their steps.

"What are they?" Hope demands, his elbow knocking onto my ribs.

"Cie'th!" Vanille cries. "L'Cie who failed!" She takes a deep breath; I cling to the ends of my daggers with trembling hands, my heart pounding against my ribs as the Cie'th draw nearer. "This is what happens—when l'Cie don't complete the Focus the fal'Cie give them."

The monsters surround us now, shuddering and stumbling toward their prey. I pull my daggers free, faltering when a shout echoes from the north and Trench Coat comes tumbling into the circle around us unannounced. He raises his fists, winking back at us.

"Let's even these odds!" he shouts.

He extends an arm and ushers us back so that all the Cie'th stand before us. Without further hesitation, he takes a swing at one of the monsters, sending it stumbling backward. He reaches into his heavy coat and pulls the pin on a grenade. Throwing the explosive toward the failed l'Cie, he pushes us back and shelters us from the blast that rocks the floor. I shake my head to clear my vision; the thin gray smoke burns my eyes. Hope loses his balance, falling forward on his hands and knees. Trench Coat walks toward us, frowning.

"How'd you get in here?" he demands, stern. "You've gotta leave." Vanille giggles nervously and I look at Hope pointedly, trying to catch his eye. He refuses to look up at the towering man, choosing instead to glower at the floor. Trench Coat sighs, resting his hands on his hips.

"Okay, listen. Find someplace to hide and keep quiet. Once I find Serah, we'll all leave together." He strides past, grinning over his shoulder. "You'll be home in time for dinner!"

"You—" Hope starts.

"Wait!" Vanille calls, staring hard at his back. When he turns to face her, she continues in a weaker voice. "Who's Serah?"

"My wife. Future wife, that is." He turns to look up at the looming ceiling. "She's a Pulse l'Cie."

"Oh no," Vanille breathes, clutching her hands together at her chest.

"She's here somewhere," he continues. "Along with that fal'Cie. I've gotta find her and set her free." He starts running again. I'm nearly deafened by Hope's voice as he leaps to his feet.

"What's _wrong_ with you?! Why do want to help a _l'Cie_?! They're the enemy!" He rushes forward, stopping at the top of the stairs. "How can you save a l'Cie and not… and not… That's _insane!_ " Trench Coat sighs, nodding and scratching at the back of his head.

"Probably. But I gotta do something, right? I'll be back!" With a final wave, he runs toward an open doorway and disappears. Hope, exhausted, collapses to the ground once more.

"Should we wait around for him, and hitch a ride?" Vanille asks.

"I'd rather go to Pulse!" Hope shouts, beating his fists on the ground. "Why is this happening to me? When they found the fal'Cie the other day, we were just visiting Bodhum." Nausea breaks over me like a wave on the shores I stood on merely two days ago and I step away, squeezing my eyes shut on the edge of the stairs, my hands pressed to my temples. "But the army took us. Threw us on that train… And because of that guy, Mom is—And he wants to help a _l'Cie_?"

"You're not the only one they…" My voice trails off and I shake my head. My hands are _burning;_ it's no good. We turn to face the source of incoming footsteps. Trench Coat waves awkwardly.

"Hey again."

"Hey," Vanille nods.

"Back already?" I ask, clasping my hands behind my back and cocking my head to the side, feinging innocence and ignorance.

"Yeah…" He shrugs, tugging at the smooth black hat covering most of his head. Vanille crouches beside Hope, tugging on his hands and whispering. Finally, the boy gets to his feet and Trench Coat laughs.

"Let's go!"

The elevator lowers steadily, revealing a man and a woman on a platform. In the woman's arms rests a thin, frail girl. Both have pale pink hair. Trench Coat calls out a name. Both people on the ground stare up at us. Not waiting a moment longer, he jumps from the elevator and runs toward the unconscious girl, falling to his knees on the side opposite to the woman. I wait with Hope and Vanille until we stop moving, hurrying toward the cluster of people either standing or sitting around who I assume is Serah. Vanille gasps, holding her hands to her mouth.

"Let's get you out of here," Trench Coat murmurs, clutching Serah's hand.

"Hands off," the woman snaps, scowling. "I'm taking her home."

"Sis, I—"

"I'm not your sister!" she snarls. "You couldn't protect her. It's your fault she—"

"You can save us," the girl whispers, her eyes fluttering open slowly.

"Serah?"

"You can save us," Serah repeats, smiling up at her sister. "Protect us all. Save… Cocoon."

"Save Cocoon? Serah? That was your focus?" the woman demands desperately, clinging to Serah.

"Anything, I'll do _anything_ ," Trench Coat insists, leaning over Serah. "Leave it to me—you'll see. I'll protect Cocoon. I'll save _everyone!"_

"Somehow, I'll make things right," the woman adds. Trench Coat nods, smiling.

"You just relax."

"Thank you," Serah whispers.

I shudder as she suddenly lifts up into the air, shining brightly as beams of light erupt from her skin.

"Serah!" the woman cries, standing to watch her sister float above all our heads.

Serah's skin ripples blue as crystal shifts over her skin, starting from the fingertips that pull away from Trench Coat's. Pulling her hands to her chest, she breathes a final breath and closes her eyes for good. Crystal juts from underneath her body at odd angles, glinting pale blues. A shard flutters down toward Trench Coat, landing in his palm; a blue crystal in the shape of a tear.

"Serah!" he shouts, jumping and swiping at her. " _Serah!"_

"Why is she turning into crystal?" Vanille asks, her voice barely over a whisper.

"L'Cie who fulfill their Focus are transformed into crystal and gain eternal life," Hope explains.

"Just like the stories say," Trench Coat murmurs, watching his fiancé float down to the ground. "Serah… Sweet dreams."

"Sweet dreams?" the woman demands, shoving the green-coated man (who was with her before we arrived) aside roughly. She grips the front of Trench Coat's shirt, shaking him as she shouts. "She's not _sleeping_! Serah's…" Her blue eyes are wide, wild with rage as she shoves him away. "She's—"

"She's alive!" Trench Coat counters.

"No!"

"The legend!" he insists. "Remember the legend! L'Cie who fulfill their Focus turn to crystal and gain eternal life. It's the same with Serah!" He turns to us, his face full of desperation. "Eternal life! She's not dead!" Hope steps back abruptly, nearly tripping when he hits my shoe. The man in the green coat cringes awkwardly, resting his hands on his hips. "Serah's my bride-to-be," Trench Coat continues, stopping before the woman who held his fiancé before. "I promised to be hers forever! I don't care how many years I have to wait—" He's cut off when the woman lashes out, punching him so hard that he lands flat on his back several feet away.

"It's _over!"_ she practically screams. I take a deep breath to calm my heart, stepping away from Trench Coat's fallen body. "Open your eyes and face reality!" Dead silence overtakes us all and Trench Coat closes his eyes with a sigh. Nothing happens for several long seconds. And then the whole Vestige shudders.

"Oh! Wait!"

Hope collapses to the floor, clutching his head, and Vanille screams. As I crouch beside Hope to make sure he's alright, Trench Coat scrambles to his feet, searching for the source of the rocking.

"What now?" Vanille calls over the sounds of the shaking.

"The army!" replies the man in the green coat.

"What are they doing?" I demand, clutching Hope's shoulder to keep myself balanced.

"Gettin' rid of the evidence," comes my bitter reply.

I duck my head down as rubble pours down from the ceiling, deep red harpoons firing clean through one side of the room and piercing the other side. The lines holding the massive arrowheads pull tight, collapsing the Vestige in upon itself. Trench Coat and the woman with pink hair kneel over Serah's crystal, protecting her from the falling debris.

"What's happening!?" Vanille cries, hugging her arms to her body.

"Must be a Sanctum strike!" Green Jacket calls back. "Bring down the Vestige and the fal'Cie right with it!" Vanille rushes toward him, clinging to his wrists.

"Aren't they taking it back to Pulse?" she pleads, her voice clearly filled with fear. "That's what the Purge was, right?"

"All they care about is getting everything Pulse off Cocoon," he replies, shaking his head. "Dead or alive, it's all the same." Vanille stumbles back, defeated. _Why does it matter?_

"We can't stay here!" Hope cries, clinging to Vanille's hand. "They'll kill us!" Just as I think he'll hyperventilate and pass out, the shaking shudders to a halt. A crimson symbol flashes on a round section of wall just ahead of us and the wall splits open with a hiss. Trench Coat sighs, taking hold of Serah's crystalized hand. "I'll be right back. Hold on." Green Jacket scoffs as the man starts toward the door.

"Trench Coat! Where are you going?" he demands.

"Date with the fal'Cie," he replies, his face the most serious I've ever seen it. "Got some things to talk about."

" _What_?" Green Jacket throws his hands up in the air, obviously nervous about this whole situation. _I wonder how he got roped into this._ "You're gonna ask _it_ to help her? Are you out of your mind, kid? That thing wants to chew us up and spit us out!"

"Well what do you want me to do?!" Trench Coat demands, swiveling around to face him.

"I—" Green Jacket can't seem to find the right words, further surprised what the woman walks past Trench Coat and heads toward the open door.

"Lightning?" Trench Coat mutters, chasing after her. _Lightning? Is that her name?_ Green Jacket sighs, hanging his head.

"Here we go."

Standing, Hope clutches to Vanille's arm, resting his head against her shoulder and taking deep breaths. I step toward Serah, running my fingers over the smooth crystal that encases her body. Something on the surface makes my skin tingle and steals my breath away. I swallow hard, watching the backs of the adults leave and listening to the shuddering, fearful breaths of Hope. Everything in my body _repelled_ that. Reaching down to touch the ends of my daggers, I close my eyes and take a deep breath. _This… This isn't what he meant. Not even close._ Opening my eyes, I give myself a reassuring nod and run toward the group heading inside. _But no one ever meant for this to happen… Did they?_

"Where are you going?" Hope cries.

"I can't just stand here," I shake my head, turning to face them as I walk backward. "Look behind you; there's nowhere to go. The floor's all gone and there's nothing but a quick death, if you'd prefer that." I glance back toward Trench Coat and the others. "I… have to find a way out of this. I won't give up just yet."

With that, I turn on my heels and hurry to catch up. The others have already overtaken a group of Cie'th, leaving blue and gray bodies scattered across the floor. I can hear the two I left behind hurrying to catch up as I move along, trying to catch my breath as I dive underneath swooping monsters. Finally, I catch up, slowing in the dim hallway leading up to a towering structure that looks like nothing more than a complicated machine. Hope and Vanille stop right behind me.

"So, this is… The fal'Cie," Hope breathes. His voice echoes through the silence, sending chills down my spine.

"Serah's a crystal now," Trench Coat calls out. "You gave her a Focus, and she did it! You got what you want! Now let her go!" he shouts. I hold my breath, waiting for any sign of change, but nothing happens. Trench Coat sinks to his hands and knees, begging. "Please. Turn her back! I'll be your l'Cie instead!" He receives no response. I want to help; my hands ache to pull him to his feet and convince him that everything will be alright if we just _leave._ The Lightning scoffs, pulling a jagged sword free from a rectangular sheathe resting against the back of her thighs.

"Fine, you go on begging. Like this thing gives a _damn_ what we want!" she shouts, rushing forward and slashing at the metal frame of the fal'Cie. Her sword ricochets off the solid surface, sending her stumbling back.

"Lightning!" Trench Coat shouts. The woman shakes her head.

"It's this thing's fault the Purge started, and it's _people_ who are dying!" She straightens, breathless. "Serah told us to save Cocoon. That means this thing needs to die!"

Just as her words are out, a series of golden lights flashes on the floor, illuminating the chamber. The gears scattered around us turn and the sides of the fal'Cie's shell pry open, a blinding light beaming through the cracks. I shield my eyes, gritting my teeth. The frame disappears, revealing the mechanical heart of the mechanism, solidified with a silvery purple crystal in the center.

"What the—" Green Jacket blurts, his brown eyes wide as he stares at the fal'Cie. Hope clutches either side of his head, panicked. Turning on his heels, he runs in the other direction.

" _Hope!"_ I call, watching him rush toward the exit. Just before he can leave, the fal'Cie traps us in with a glistening, glowing red wall of light that shocks the when he collides with it. Vanille runs after him to help him up. Torn, I look between my two choices.

"Come on now," Green Jacket says, leaning closer to Lightning and Trench Coat. "You really think you can kill a fal'Cie?"

"I'm doing this for Serah!" Lightning snaps, raising her sword. Green Jacket shakes his head, muttering something under his breath. A small chocobo chick suddenly pops up from beneath the dark afro on his head and chirps.

"I'm in," he nods, pull two guns free from the holsters on his legs. He glances back toward me. "Head on back to the kiddie table before you get hurt."

Normally, I might argue, especially when a complete stranger tells me what to do (and refers to my place as the "kiddie table"), but now doesn't seem like the right time. I nod and hurry toward Hope and Vanille, who huddle together by the blocked exit. Shoulder to shoulder with the shuddering boy, I watch as the others dive in with blade and bludgeoning and bullet.

Lightning destroys one of the twirling manipulators on the left and Trench Coat tears down the one on the right. Finally, all three attack the centered crystal core. My fingernails dig into my palms and my teeth clench as the fal'Cie falters and swings to the side at Lightning's next especially hard blow.

Another flash of blinding light bursts forth, leaving me hunched over and hiding my eyes with my arm. A loud ringing resonates through my skull and my teeth are clenched so tightly I fear they may fracture. Suddenly, all is swept away, and when I move my arm, I'm floating in a sea of darkness illuminated only by the very same crystal Lightning struck. Around me are those who also entered this space, drifting across the surrounding air.

"Where are we?" Lightning murmurs, looking around sharply. I squint into the darkness, watching the dim golden glow of her pauldron fade into black and white with everything else. Green Jacket floats through the air aimlessly, breaths quickening as he turns upside down. We're ripped away from each other when the crystal trembles, dragging us into a circle around the glowing stone. A gong sounds off in the distance once, twice.

"What's going on?" Trench Coat asks to no one in particular.

It feels like my heart is in my throat, pounding relentlessly. The gong goes off a third time and the crystal bursts into a faded blue light and reveling a towering, metallic figure of a man. _The fal'Cie…_ I watch in pure awe as it towers over us, all turning cogs, glowing wires, and twisting blades.

A fourth gong strikes and a flurry of thin, long tendrils of light flick out toward us. I choke on a scream as they wind their way around my entire body in a matter of moments, tightening around my limbs and sprawling me out. I struggle against their hold, fighting the tears that well up from both frustration and terror. A spire on the fal'Cie snaps open and another beam of light shoots out, wrapping itself around my neck, twisting around my waist, and stabbing into my hip. I choke on a cry of pain, flailing against the unbearable burn spreading across my skin. With a final rough jerk, the tendrils thrust me into the darkness and draw back. The fal'Cie fades away entirely and I find myself completely wrapped in pitch black emptiness.

Without warning, flashes of blurry, black and white images scatter through my head. An endless echoing stream of garbled words fills the silence. Long, spindly limbs, a shrieking monster, sprays of debris bursting forth from a crumbling world. A final wail before everything flashes white, black, and then vanishes.

In a mere moment, everything becomes nothing.


	5. Lake Bresha

My surroundings fade to light slowly. The sounds of exhausted, pained groaning, a shout for Serah, a sniffle. I peel my eyes open and wince, peeking at the smooth blue wall above me through my dark lashes. Taking a deep breath, I force myself to sit up, wincing when a sharp pain burns into my hip where the fal'Cie's light grabbed me. This place feels so unfamiliar... Until I realize it was once the lake beneath the Vestige. Now solidified in bright blue crystal, waves roll into solid curls, even the mist about them frozen in place midair. Trench Coat pulls himself to his feet, awed.

"Is this... for real?" he breathes.

As the rest of us stand, Hope sits on the ground with his face buried in his elbow. I will myself to leave him alone; he'd only push me away. Instead, I take a deep breath and stretch up on my toes. _That dream, the burns, the fal'Cie..._ My heart skips a beat and I wonder what I ate that's causing the churning in my stomach. _I can't be..._

"This must be... Lake Bresha?" Green Jacket guesses, looking up at the sealed sky above. "I guess we fell from up there, and the lake turned to crystal?" He looks around in confusion. "Help me out here! I mean, did the fal'Cie do this? How in the world did we end up here?"

"How should I know?" Lightning replies coldly. Vanille falls to her knees, clutching her hands to her chest.

"We're alive. How?"

"Serah!" Trench Coat shouts suddenly. "No one survives a fall from that high, not without a miracle. Serah saved us!"

"Serah?" Lightning demands incredulously, crossing her arms. "Listen, it's all your fault she got—"

I cry out a warning upon seeing a group of Cie'th stumbling up behind her. Green Jacket panics, stumbling toward the woman.

"Hey, hey, hey, _hey_!"

"Watch out!" Trench Coat shouts, raising his arms over his head to block a downward strike from the monster's heavy arm, shaking under its weight before he shoves it back. The black brand on his arm lights up, and when he swings at the Cie'th, shards of ice burst from his fist and skitter across the ground. "What did I... Just do?" he asks under his breath, staring at the mark. _Oh no..._

"You used magic!" Hope yells, dragging himself to his feet. "You used the power of a l'Cie! The fal'Cie cursed us. We're l'Cie now!" My heart catches at the base of my throat. _L'Cie... But..._

"Right," Lightning grits, pulling her sword free and rushing toward the next three Cie'th.

I lose my balance, my head goes light, and I fall to the ground beside Hope. My fingers trace absently over my hip, feeling the gentle sting caused by the pressure of my hand. Vanille rushes in to help Lightning and Serah's fiancé, throwing in spells as if she's caught on to the new skill quite easily.

I shake my head, tugging at the short black hair framing my face. _This can't be happening. Is this what he warned me about?_ All I want is to wake up in my room with his hand on my shoulder, shaking me into consciousness and telling me to get ready for school before he kicks me down to Pulse.

The last Cie'th falls with a groan.

"Oh no..." Trench Coat whispers, staring at his arm. He swivels around to face us. "So we really are l'Cie." Green Jacket brushes the mark on his chest that's peeking out of his shirt, sighing.

"Looks like it."

"You too?" Trench Coat asks, turning to Vanille. She nods, pulling her skirt up to reveal a brand high up on her thigh.

"Yup. Right here."

"Okay..." The blonde sighs, looking over at me and Hope. The boy gets to his feet, wandering past Vanille and staring out at the lake absently.

"L'Cie to the last," Lightning mutters. Shuddering, Hope falls back to the ground.

"Why me?" His face flashes with rage as he glares up at all of us. "I don't even _know_ you! But you have to go and attack that thing?!" Guilt flashes through the eyes of Trench Coat and Green Jacket, but Lightning remains as cold as before. "Just leave me alone!" Hope's gaze falls from Trench Coat's back, his hands clenched together in his lap. "It's your fault—it's your fault my—!" He shakes his head. "You could've—!" He leaps to his feet, scowling up at Trench Coat. "All of this is your and Serah's fault!"

"Watch it!" Trench Coat snaps, stepping forward.

Hope stumbles backward, alarmed, scooting away with terror written clear across his face. He pauses upon knocking into Lightning's legs. Shaking, he huddles away from the group, taking rapid, panicked breaths as he holds his head in his hands. Sheepishly, Trench Coat rubs the back of his neck.

"Sorry."

I crawl over to Hope, resting a hand on his arm. Vanille takes hold of his shoulders, forcing a smile.

"Everything is gonna be alright. You'll see."

"Come on," I nod, pulling him to his feet. "We'll figure it out."

"Off we go!" Vanille cheers, skipping down the crystal path. I release Hope's arm and let him run along with Vanille.

"L'Cie, huh?" Trench Coat mutters, glancing at his brand once more.

"Yep," Green Jacket says, throwing his fists in the air. "We're all playing for Team Pulse now." He sighs, shaking his head. "Why me?"

We walk down the steeper side of the crystal we awoke on, regrouping with Hope and Vanille. Finally, Lightning speaks up, keeping her pace steady as she walks across the smooth surface of the lake.

"Okay, if we don't know our Focus, how do we complete it?"

"I think... I saw it," Vanille speaks up weakly.

"Saw what?"

Vanille doesn't reply, searching for words. Green Jacket pipes up.

" _That_ is how a Focus comes down, people. The fal'Cie? They don't spell it out with clear-cut instructions. All you get is a hazy glimpse." Lightning and Trench Coat stare at him with eyebrows raised, arms crossed in skepticism. Green Jacket gets nervous. "Well, that's what they say. You know, legends and all." He throws his hands in the air, slowly turning his back to them. "L-legends." Lightning turns to me and Hope.

"Did either of you see anything?"

"I, uh—I just... It's all kinda foggy, but..." Hope stutters, keeping his eyes on the ground. "I saw this big—I mean _towering—"_

"It had these claws and tentacles and it was _screaming_ ," I add, quieting down when realization flashes over Green Jacket's face.

"W-wait a minute." He steps closer to us. "Hold on now. Did we _all_ have the same dream?"

"Ragnarok," Lighting and Trench Coat mutter at the same time. Green Jacket huffs, shaking his head.

"So, we _all_ saw the same dream. We all heard that same voice."

"You mean _that_ was our Focus?" Hope asks. "But how are we supposed to know what to do from that?"

"We aren't," I answer, shaking my head. "We have to work it out."

"That's the tricky part," Vanille nods. "The dream's only a hint the fal'Cie gives us. Figuring out what to do with it—that's our job!"

"Okay, okay," Green Jacket breathes, holding up a hand to stop her. "We're Pulse l'Cie, right? Enemies of Cocoon! So, does that mean our Focus is—? Are we supposed to—?"

"Save her."

"Say what?"

"Our Focus is to protect Cocoon," Trench Coat announces.

"Really?" Vanille asks, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "Okay, and why's that?"

"Serah told us. Let's do it! We're all in this together."

"But..." I start, stepping forward nervously. "How did Serah know? L'Cie don't have that kind of power... Do they?" I'm met with nothing but silence. Trench Coat shakes his head.

"I'm gonna look for Serah. She oughta be nearby."

"I'll come too!" Vanille calls, hurrying to walk beside him. Green Jacket groans.

"Geeze, that boy can't stay still!"

"Really..." Hope mutters, following the rest of the group.

I sigh, glancing up at Lightning's scowl before hurrying to catch up with the others. I fall in stride with Green Jacket and Hope, staring up at the frozen lake trapped around us. I wonder what would happen if the crystal broke and set those towering waves free.

"We need to find a way out of here," Trench Coat insists, tossing a glance over his shoulder. "We can worry about everything else later." _And yet we're all looking for Serah now._ Vanille laughs, looking around at the lake.

"I can't see anything but crystal! It's pretty and all, but it's kind of creepy, too."

"I'd have to agree with that," I mutter, staring at the face of a soldier trapped in crystal, his hand stretched out toward me as if he's pleading for anyone to set him free.

But I know he's long gone, so I swallow the lump in my throat and hurry by. Ahead, Trench Coat and Vanille take down another Cie'th, leaving it laying on the path. _That thing... it was once human._ I shiver; it's all too much. But... I can't react like Hope. I was never allowed to bend under pressure before and I certainly can't do that now. I have to hold my head up high and keep moving. _Right._ Suddenly, Trench Coat comes to a stop, grinning.

"We fight it! Ragnarok!" He throws a fist in the air. "That's the reason we're l'Cie. To stop it—to keep Cocoon safe!"

"Yeah, why don't you give us reason to believe that?" Green Jacket challenges. "One reason."

"Serah." I sigh, earning a sidelong look from Lightning. "She said to protect Cocoon, and then she turned to crystal. That's the proof right there. She completed her Focus! That means _ours_ is to save Cocoon!" He turns to Lightning as he rants, waving his hands about to prove a point I'm far from believing. "Serah's fal'Cie was the same as ours. Our Focus has got to be the same. We were chosen to be guardians, to defeat Ragnarok! It makes sense!"

"The hell it does!" Green Jacket scoffs. "You're grasping at straws, son!"

"Yeah," I sigh, looking up at Trench Coat earnestly. "I just... we were _chosen?_ Do I look like a warrior ready to defeat Ragnarok?" I shake my head, but he shakes his back, stepping closer.

"You can use the power of a l'Cie! Just train and maybe—"

"Pulse fal'Cie are Cocoon's enemies. We just got recruited by one," Green Jacket points out. "If I were a betting man..." His voice falls into a darker tone. "I'd put us on the other side."

"So Serah's an enemy too? Well I don't buy it!" He rushes toward Lightning. "We have the power to save Cocoon. If we work together and carry out our Focus—"

"Our _Focus?_ " she demands, pressing her sword to his throat. "The fal'Cie took Serah from us, and you want to help it? Whose side are you on?"

"Freeze!" A cluster of PSICOM soldiers rushes toward us, coming to a stop behind a man who stands with his gun rested on his shoulder. Two more reveal themselves from behind a wall of crystal, pointing their weapons at us. "Place your hands behind your heads!"

Swallowing hard with my heart pounding in my chest, I comply immediately. My trembling fingers clasp behind my hair, my stomach churning as the soldiers creep closer. My mind races with possibilities. Will they kill us? Torture us? Send us to Pulse? I jump when Lightning's gunblade clatters to the ground.

"You fall off the Purge train?" the first soldier asks, his voice mocking as he walks toward us. _They don't know we're l'Cie...?_ Lightning gets a peculiar look in her eye and rests her hands behind her head.

"Maybe," she mutters. The soldier charges toward her, weapon poised.

"Are you talking back to me?" he demands, the barrel of his weapon grazing Lightning's chin. A smirk tugs at the corner of her lips.

"Nice gun." _What are you doing?!_ As quick as her namesake, she strikes the weapon from his hands and kicks him to the ground. The other soldiers rush to take action and she stomps on the end of her blade, catching it as it flies into the air.

In one graceful move, she sweeps her blade out in a circle, easily taking out half the army's pawns. I watch, frozen in fear as she clashes with the rest, Trench Coat and Green Jacket joining in to take down the rest of our opposers. The last soldier falls and Green Jacket peers down at the body, sighing.

"I thought they'd be tougher than that," he admits, scratching at his afro. "These guys are PSICOM, yeah?" He crouches, waving a hand over the soldier's helmeted head. "Supposed to be the cream of the crop." Vanille kneels over the fallen man, hands folded into an odd shape, her head bowed. A prayer of sorts. I shudder, feeling sick as my hands fall to my sides. _He's... dead, isn't he? We're killers now? Just as bad as..._

"Yeah, but PSICOM's an anti-Pulse task force," Trench Coat points out. "Haven't fought a war in centuries. Bunch of rookie troops swinging around overpriced toys." Green Jacket stands, straightening.

"So, from what you're telling me, it sounds like a regular old soldier has got more training than special forces." Trench Coat smiles, tapping his brand and shrugging.

"Nothing for us l'Cie to be afraid of." His nonchalance makes me nauseous.

"Cut the crap," Lightning retorts, her back turned to her sister's fiancé. "Their grunts might be green, but PSICOM's elites are cold-blooded beasts. They hit the field and it's game over."

"I don't the sound of that," I mumble, crossing my arms.

"Uh-oh!" Vanille cries. "Then let's run away! Ciao!"

"Hey, wait!" Green Jacket calls, waving at the running girl. A chocobo chick flutters down from his hair, landing on his palm. "What's a man to do?" he grumbles, slowly following Vanille. Sighing, I walk behind him, arms hugged to my body as I scan over the corpses littering the ground. _How many more will die?_

We continue our fast pace across the crystal lake, Vanille diving around any Cie'th she sees. I never knew the lake was so enormous; it's not exactly something they teach you in school. Hope runs along behind me, keeping his obvious distance from Trench Coat with his green eyes trailing the landscape.

"Weird, isn't it?" Trench Coat muses. "Of all the messed up ways to meet..." He shakes his head, keeping his steady pace. "Might as well make introductions. I'm Snow—Snow Villiers." _Finally—a real name for a pretender's face._ "Short stuff?"

"Which one?" I ask, fighting a smile when he chuckles. Hope speaks up first.

"Hope. Hope Estheim."

"And I'm Amarhi Raines," I add, nodding. Vanille looks ahead to Lightning, who now runs ahead of us.

"And what about her?"

"Bodhum Security Regiment. She goes by 'Lightning'," Snow replies. "Last name's Farron. First? Anybody's guess."

"Alright," the girl nods. "I'm Vanille."

"Sazh Katzroy," Green Jacket calls out. "Good to meet you."

Vanille laughs as our pace slows down, skipping around the next open space we come across. Hope follows at her heels, careful not to get caught up with Snow. Intimidated by the towering adults in our group, I chase after the strange girl too. Sazh sighs.

"It's not right. Why'd kids have to get dragged into this?"

"I'll keep the kids outta trouble," Snow claims, pointing a finger at his chest with a cocky smile on his face. Sazh laughs, clapping a hand down on Snow's back.

"Problem with that is, you're one of them."

"Hey!"

"Trying to take on the Pulse fal'Cie, that was our first mistake," Sazh continues, strolling toward us. "Should have left it to the Sanctum."

"Hey!" Vanille calls, hands cupping her mouth to make her voice louder. "C'mon!" I look back at the pilot behind me, listening to his words. Desperate to catch some attention, the girl grabs Hope's wrist and waves his hand in the air.

"Why not? I mean, we've counted on the Sanctum's fal'Cie for food, water, everything we've needed since the time we were born."

"But you still helped us do it. Why's that? Gotta be something," Snow points out, arms crossed. Sazh's dark eyes flicker around our crystalized surroundings.

"Yeah, there might've been." Glancing at me, he starts toward Vanille. "Not so sure anymore."

Shaking my head, I follow the man. He knows something that he's not saying, I'm certain of that much. He's not telling his reasons for doing what he did, but he knows far too much about the l'Cie legends and finding Focuses and all that fal'Cie-created jargon. If I can keep my eye on him, maybe I'll catch something he doesn't want to share.


	6. Devoted

_~9 years before~_

 _"The prince, having succeeded in defeating his mortal enemy, was seated upon the throne and the sunlight returned to the land. Even in death, he was able to bring peace to his country, and his people lived happily ever after."_

 _"Tell me another!" I squeal, gathering a fistful of soft, blue blankets and pulling them up to my chin. "Please, Cid?"_

 _"It's late," Cid replies dryly, shaking his head and starting to stand. Cassie, stands in the doorway, smiling softly with her arms crossed over her chest._

 _"It's not!" I protest, grabbing the end of his sleeve. He sighs, offering me a weak smile. "Please?"_

 _"You only get one story a night, Marhi, you know that."_

 _"… You're upset."_

 _"No, I'm not. I'm just tired. Why don't you get some sleep? I'll see you in the morning."_

 _"Come on, Marhi," Cassie urges, shaking her long hair out of her face. "We have school tomorrow."_

 _"Are they being mean to you?" I ask Cid, ignoring my sister's prompting._

 _"What?" His dark eyebrows pinch together. "I told you, there's nothing wrong."_

 _"But there is!" I insist, sitting up and giving him my best, biggest puppy eyes. Shaking his head, my brother sits back down on the edge of my bed. "I'm gonna get whoever's being mean to you!"_

 _"Are you?" Cid asks, though there's a playful note to his voice and his lips have quirked into a slight smile. He reaches out a hand and smooths my wild short hair. "You always were a tough one." Cassie laughs, skipping over to sit cross-legged on her bed._

 _"Yeah!" I pull up the sleeve of my white shirt and flex my bicep as hard as I can. "I'll beat 'em up!"_

 _"We'll see," he laughs softly, standing and glancing at Cassie. "But you have to get some rest before your big fight."_

 _"Duh!" I stick out my tongue and pull the covers back up, screwing my eyes shut. "Turn the light off, Cid! I'm getting ready!"_

 _"Alright." The lights switch off and Cid glances at me once more before pulling the door closed gently. I peek open one eye and throw my legs out of bed, hurrying to the window on the other side of my bedroom. I fall to my knees, clasping my hands together and shutting my eyes._

 _"What're you doing?" Cassie asks, curious. I peek open one eye, frowning at her before going back to what I was doing before._

 _"Dear fal'Cie," I start, chewing on my lip. "Please give me big muscles so I can beat up Cid's bullies. Thank you!" Feeling much happier, I leap to my feet and skip back to my bed. I roll over and pull my blankets over my head. Cassie snickers. My door creaks open seconds later._

 _"Guys?" Cid calls. I squeeze my eyes shut, pretending to be asleep. He sighs, closing the door quietly. Under the covers, I grin. You're not alone anymore._

As we continue down the winding path of crystal that weaves through the debris of the Hanging Edge, I begin to notice that we're crossing less and less Cie'th and more of the metal guard dogs crafted by PSICOM. I don't feel bad killing those off; they're only machines. It's the soldiers that I refuse to fight. I'm not ready to take another human life. I know he would be disappointed, but I have time to grow—if I make it out of this. I take a deep breath, crossing my arms loosely. I'm not sure how to react to the distinct feeling of relief that floods through my body every time a spell fires from the palm of my hand. It's as if the pressure's been building inside my body this whole time, and little by little, I'm setting it free.

"Is that wreckage from the Vestige?" Snow wonders aloud as we wander underneath a chain of steel links that are trapped between two crystal arches.

"Of course. What else would it be?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.

"She's got a point," Sazh chuckles. Snow shrugs, muttering something under his breath.

Lightning leaps up a steep, slippery slope as if it's nothing more than a series of stairs. I hesitate, watching Snow and Vanille follow suit. _In what universe would someone inherently have the skills it takes to do that?_ Sighing, I hurry to climb up after them, using my hands to help my slow crawl. This is where my distinct lack of height becomes a burden. Sure, it has its advantages. People offer to help you with simple things, you can "cute" your way out of situations, and it's easier to go unnoticed. So far, however, I'm having quite a difficult time keeping up with these short legs of mine. I can hear Hope climbing up behind me at a slower pace. I at least have the advantage of athleticism on my side. He looks like he's nothing very physical outside of playing dodgeball in gym class.

When I finally reach the top, I see that Sazh waited behind for us, impatiently standing with his hands on his hips and a dark eyebrow arched. I offer him a smile of gratitude and crouch to offer Hope a hand. He frowns, purposefully crawling to the side to get around me and pull himself up. I huff, biting my cheek and straightening. Sazh sighs, shaking his head upon seeing my clear irritation. We head down the ridged surface of what I assume was once a train car to see the others slowing to a stop, focused on a point across a small gap. I narrow my eyes, trying to see what it is they've spotted.

"Serah…" Lightning says quietly, eyes wide.

"Serah!" Snow bellows, shoving past Lightning and rushing toward the frozen girl just down the path. He kneels before her crystallized body, pressing a hand to the side of her head. "I'll get you out of there!" He turns around and pulls a sharp bit of debris-free from a crystallized wave, using it like an axe to chip away that the glimmering stone that holds his fiancé in place. Vanille and Sazh rush to help him, gathering what tools they can and digging with him.

"I'll help you!" Vanille grits, slamming a rod into the crystal.

"Thanks!"

I stand behind them, watching with a frown. _There's no point... What will salvaging her do for us now?_ Lightning's brows pinch together before she turns her back to the three on the ground.

"This is goodbye," she mutters, shaking her head.

"Lightning?" Snow calls, standing sharply. "You're just gonna leave her?"

"PSICOM will be here soon," she replies dryly. "If they find us, we're all dead. You think Serah would want that? You think you know how she feels?"

"If I leave her, then I'll never know." Snow shakes his head. "We'll be fine. I can handle anything they throw at us. No one will die. I'll protect Serah. And Cocoon!" Lightning, gritting her teeth, turns sharply and throws her fist into his cheek, sending him to the ground. On his way down, Snow knocks into Sazh, bringing the pilot with him.

"Does she look protected to you?!"

"I can save her!" Snow protests, getting to his feet.

I hurry to help the older man up, taking hold of his elbow and tugging. Lightning smacks him back to the ground. Sazh is pulled from my grasp, groaning when he hits the crystal floor a second time. I lose my balance, falling to my hands and knees with a wince. I appreciate her attempt to talk sense into him, but she doesn't have to take the rest of us, too.

"What can you possibly do?!" Lightning demands, practically screaming.

"Whatever it takes!"

"You two are hopeless," Sazh scoffs, standing and walking far, far out of range in case Lightning lashes out again. "You just can't admit it." Snow scoffs, picking up his tool and returning to his digging. "You want to stay as much as he does," he adds under his breath, speaking to Lightning as he leans back against a sheet of metal.

I jump when a beam of light flashes over the confined space. I follow the light and gasp, startled. An enormous, mangled machine looms in the way of our exit, flashing its spotlight on Sazh.

"Whoa, whoa!" He shields his eyes from the light, eyes widening when he spots the towering machine. "No… No! No, no, no, not now!" he shouts.

Lightning unsheathes her sword, rushing toward the new enemy head-on. Snow drops what he's doing. The PSICOM weapon leaps into the air, nearly landing on top of Hope. He screams, turning to run to the back of the group. Heart pounding, I draw my daggers, standing ready at Vanille's side.

"Stand back!" Snow commands, throwing an arm out in front of Sazh to keep him out of the way.

Lightning is the first to strike, rushing at the battered machine and tearing through its weakened shell with her jagged blade. Snow rolls under the whirring blades the creature swipes at him, swiftly sending his fists into its side. Focusing as well as I can, I extend my hand, watching a spray of sparks meet their mark. The creature's movements stagger, shocked out of place by its weakness. I hardly have to pay this much attention; this magic thing feels second nature.

In response, it sends out a wave of scorching hot light, burning everyone within a five-foot radius. I grit my teeth, clutching my blistering arm to my chest. Vanille immediately sends a spray of dancing green lights from her hooked staff. I'm overwhelmed with comforting warmth as the spell mends my wounds.

Taking a deep breath, I throw out another thunder spell before rushing at the machine, tearing into its body with my curved daggers. Wires and gears spill out like blood. Lightning slams her sword up into the base of the creature's "head," effectively destroying its ability to process information. Sparking and groaning, it twitches a final few times before collapsing onto its side with one last puff of smoke. Without another word, Lightning turns and starts toward the path leading further away from where we woke up. Snow, alarmed, jumps out in front of her.

"You're leaving?"

"We want to help Serah, too," Sazh speaks up, his expression kind. He sighs, resting his hands on his hips and nodding toward the crystalized girl. "But without proper tools… we could be digging for days." He paces toward Snow, his hands moving about as he speaks. "The army's on our trail. For now, we've got to keep moving. _For now."_ Instead of listening to the man's words of advice, Snow gets defensive.

"So I just abandon her, and save myself?" he demands in disbelief.

"What about your Focus?" Lightning snaps. "What happened to banding together and saving the world? Isn't that what you promised? Now you want to forget it all and die right here?" Sazh scoffs, rolling his eyes. "Snow?" Lightning scoffs, stepping around him. "You're nothing but _talk._ "

Snow stands with his hands balled into fists, glowering down at the ground. His face twists through a series of emotions. Lightning strides away, not bothering to see if anyone will follow.

"Lightning!" Snow hisses, his voice sharp. She stops, but she refuses to look back at him. "I'll do whatever it takes. I'll finish this Focus… _and_ keep Serah safe. That's my promise."

"Great job so far." With that, she continues her brisk departure. Sazh sighs, shaking his head. Snow offers him a forced smile.

"Stay out of trouble."

"You too," Sazh replies stiffly, gripping the young man's shoulder before following Lightning. _So he's staying here?_ I shake my head. _Of course he is._ Snow looks up at me, Vanille, and Hope, forcing a grin as he motions to the two that have already left.

"Get goin'." Vanille hangs her head, walking past him slowly. "Later."

"Okay."

"Good luck," I say, earning a reassuring nod. I run after the others, looking back to see that Hope's stopped to stare at the leader of the rebellion that started this all. But I can tell he's not going to speak. I rest a hand on my hip, shaking my head with a sigh. _This is going to be a long trip._

"Coming?" I call, cocking my head to the side. He looks up sharply, nodding upon seeing my expectant look. "What was that all about?" I ask under my breath as he walks past. His eyes flicker up to mine before he looks back at the crystal.

"I was going to tell him… but I realized now's not the time." His voice is as tight as the fists at his sides. Sighing, I look back at Snow, watching the ridiculous young man wave at us before kneeling at the foot of Serah's crystal.

"Did he say anything?"

"Not really," Hope shrugs. He scoffs, shaking his head. "He thought I stayed because I was worried about leaving him behind." I let out a sarcastic laugh, rolling my eyes.

"Cocky bastard."

Hope glances up at me through his eyelashes, and for the first time, flashes the slightest smile. And then it fades and so does the glimpse of his real person as he straightens and shakes his head, staring up ahead at Lightning.

"Yeah, well, I'm going to kill him for killing my mother."

"Need any help?"

"No," he replies sharply, glaring. "You don't know what it's like to watch... It has to be me that kills him."

"I don't know what it's like," I repeat, pushing past him to catch up to the others. "You've got a lot to learn."

"Like?"

"Hm." I turn to face him as I walk backwards, tapping my chin to mock thinking. "I don't know, maybe _don't_ make assumptions about what another person's been through, yeah?" I shrug. "Oh, and rule number two: don't be an _ass_ to nice girls."

"Nice…?" he scoffs, frowning.

Without waiting for the idiot to understand, I hurry to catch up to the others, who likely won't frustrate me nearly as much as this kid. Sazh shakes his head, looking over his shoulder at Snow. He scratches at his thick hair and the chocobo chick pops out at the top of his head, chirping cheerfully.

"I'm not happy about leaving the kid on his own, but we've got to keep moving." We start to follow Lightning down the narrow path. Vanille's fingers clasp anxiously over her chest.

"Maybe we shouldn't have left him on his own…" she wonders out loud, clearly worried.

"He's a big boy," I reply with a reassuring nod. "He can handle himself, yeah? As long as he doesn't have to make any big decisions, I guess." I add the last piece under my breath, but Sazh hears and chuckles softly, though it's not convincing. Snow doesn't strike me as the kind of man who makes wise choices on a whim. He lets adrenaline and heroics get the better of him and, well, that's that.

"Guess all we can do is pray he makes it out okay," Sazh sighs.

The conversation is cut off a trio of frog-like lizards bound toward us, croaking and ribbiting loudly enough to create an overlapping echo in the valley. Lightning draws her sword, cutting into the first one's scaly skin. Sazh fires once, twice from his guns, his bullets striking the creature down for good. Hope shuffles to the back of the group, watching with intrigued horror.

Vanille and I rush forward. The strange girl uses her hooked wand to tear through the thin flesh of the next creature and I stretch out a palm, watching as a glittering bolt of electricity strikes its skin and sends it sliding across the crystal on its side, dead. Lightning kills off the last one, slinging the green blood from her sword onto the ground before folding it away like an oversized pocketknife and sliding it into the sheathe hanging at the back of her thighs.

"Not bad, kiddos," Sazh compliments. "Though, I wish killing wasn't somethin' you'd have to be good at." Vanille grins, nodding.

"Thank you!"

"How do you know how to use your magic?" Hope asks Vanille and I once Sazh moves away to walk behind Lightning.

"You just use it," I shrug dismissively. I'm finished catering to this kid's tendency to let everyone else do the work. If there's one thing my brother taught me, it's that you always pull your weight, no matter how light it is compared to everyone else's. Right now, we're carrying _Hope._ "Stop pouting about it, recognize it as part of _you_ , and exercise it like any other muscle."

"It's not part of us," he snaps defensively. "It's fal'Cie control!"

"Again: no pouting."

"Amarhi," Vanille sighs, her shoulders slumping. "It's a lot to handle, isn't it?"

"Yup," I reply dismissively, running my fingers over my stinging brand. "But we've all taken it upon ourselves to accept what's happened and find a way forward. Hope's dragging his feet and throwing a fit; _that's_ what gets people killed."

"You act like you know everything!" he shouts. Sazh glances back, eyebrow arched.

"Well I certainly know more than _you,"_ I retort. "Grow up."

"C'mon, guys," Sazh butts in, gesturing for me to walk ahead. "Picking fights ain't helping either, kid."

"Whatever," I huff, crossing my arms and hurrying to catch up to Lightning. Curious, I eye her clothing, noting her green pauldron. _Snow said she was in the Bodhum Security Regiment, didn't he?_ "So…" I nearly jump out of my skin when those cold blue eyes meet mine, burning into my very soul. No wonder Hope panicked when he bumped into her. "You're Guardian Corps, right?"

"I was," she corrects, facing forward once more.

"You left?"

"Do I look like I work for them anymore?" she snaps. I shake my head.

"I guess not… Just thought you'd ditch the uniform."

"Didn't have time," comes her short reply before she leaps down onto a narrow platform below. Sazh shakes his head, patting my shoulder.

"Trust me, I've tried. She's just here to survive; we're just baggage."

"More like parasites," I scoff, jumping down after her.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Sazh shouts. I look back up at him, curious. "You gotta be more careful!"

"I'll be alright," I call back, cautiously balancing along the pipe as I hurry down its slope to the next portion of crystal.

"Okay, do not shake the slippery tube!" Sazh warns as Vanille and Hope drop down. "We cool on this? Do _not_ shake the slippery tube!"

"Hey! That's a long way down!" Vanille points out cheerfully, peering down into the abyss of spiked crystal a hundred or so feet below.

"Yeah, thanks," Sazh huffs. I sigh, turning my eyes up to the sky. _It's never going to end, is it?_


	7. Mindful Follower

We head up the smooth slope of crystal to see a crashed vehicle that towers several feet over our heads. It looks like sort of weapon. Lightning peers down to where the path below leads to a wall of crystal that blocks the way. Water must have poured down before it was caught in the tide of the fal'Cie. Without a word, the soldier pushes past Hope and reaches up to press something on the control panel. A gun's gears whir as it turns to aim at the wall. Nothing happens for a moment. Hope jumps when the turret fires a spray of bullets into the crystal, shooting until there's no more ammunition and the wall's crumbled.

I admire the glittering destruction a moment longer before following Lightning down to the open path. Sazh scratches at the back of his head, shrugging at Vanille when she raises her eyebrows. Hope twists the bandana tied over his brand nervously, hurrying to catch up with the rest of the group. We wander through the tunnel created by towering walls of bright blue crystal that gleams and glints like glass.

Finally, the tunnel opens up into the sunlight again. Lightning skids to a stop suddenly, drawing her sword. I peek around her, my heart skipping a beat when I see the shining green armor of a PSICOM behemoth. It digs its steel claws into the crystal floor, snarling. I pull my daggers free from their sheathes, uneasily watching the thing rear onto its hind legs before growling at us. Lightning hesitates no longer, running in to fight the beast. Sazh shouts a protest before following, pistols in hand. Taking a deep breath, I roll my shoulders and muster up the courage to join them.

"Oh boy," I mutter before rushing into the open, ready. Behind me, Vanille wavers nervously.

"It's weak to water and fire," Vanille squeaks out. Lightning frowns at her as Sazh's guns pop out four shots.

"How do you know that?"

"The fal'Cie," the girl replies, eyes flickering over to the behemoth. "It gives us the power to read the creatures we encounter."

Before anyone can ask how she figured this out, the behemoth lunges at Lightning, swiping a claw at the place she stood before she dove out of the way. She slashes at its side twice, flipping out of the way of a counterattack and firing a shot from her weapon when it transforms from a sword to a gun. _A gunblade?_ I stumble out of the way of the creature's swatting tail, watching as Sazh casts a flurry of fire spells. _Get your head in the game, Amarhi._

I nod to myself, hurrying to help Lightning. I dig the point of a dagger into the leg of the beast and tear along its steely skin, ripping a hole into its body and immobilizing the limb. The behemoth whips around to attack me when a splash of water drops over its head. Snarling, it turns back to Vanille, who quickly splashes it again, encouraged by the reaction. Sazh summons up another small burst of fire. While the ugly beast is rearing its head like a child throwing a tantrum, Lightning swings up onto the monster's back and drives her sword through its head several times. Shuddering, the behemoth collapses.

Vanille shudders and lowers her weapon, turning and motioning for Hope to join us. The boy steps out of the shadows, rejoining the group and avoiding my pointed glare. Sazh looks up at the sky upon hearing the whine of speeding motors.

"Look at that. They're sending in cruisers." He shakes his head, placing his hands on his hips. "Primarch must be sweatin' bullets, mobilizing ships like that."

We come to join him on the ledge he's standing on, staying low and looking down at the massive golden airship that stretches out over the valley below. Dozens of smaller soldier cruisers speed through the air and hundreds of soldiers themselves line up on the ground clutching guns and preparing to divide and conquer.

"They must be hunting down Purge survivors," Sazh mutters.

"I hope everyone made it out okay," Vanille replies. I bite my tongue and keep my thoughts to myself. _With all this crystal, no one made it anywhere._

"So do I," Sazh nods. "But nowhere is safe for them now." He hits the ground with his palm. "Damn it!" I glance down at Hope, who hugs his legs to his chest and hangs his head. "Just 'cuz they shared a neighborhood with a fal'Cie... They get treated like Pulse-tainted rats." Vanille's face falls.

"People really hate Pulse, don't they?"

"Not _hate_ ," I correct, shaking my head. "They _fear_ it."

"Ain't a difference these days," Sazh mutters. "Tens of millions of people… all scared of Pulse boogeyman," he muses, tracing a finger over the brand on his chest. "They'd be shaking in their beds every night if they knew that l'Cie like us were around."

"But… They Purged that entire town!" Vanille protests.

"It's crazy, I know. But the Sanctum fal'Cie did nothing to stop it. Up until now, Eden's always stepped in to correct their errors in judgement. Guess humans aren't worth the effort." He shrugs, letting his hands land on his lap. "Figure they'll let us just kill each other off." Hope stands, scowling at the back of the man's head.

"L'Cie are not human," he says bitterly.

"Listen, you, that's enough!" Vanille cries, leaping to her feet and stomping over to the boy. She grabs his arm and lifts his wrist into the light, forcing him to look at the black arrows that twist into the brand of a l'Cie on his skin. With a huff, she hurries a bit down the path, clasping her hands together. "We're still alive. That's something." Before anyone can respond, the ground begins to tremble.

"What?" Lightning whispers.

"Where is it?" Sazh mutters.

"I don't know," Hope shakes his head, looking up at the sky.

"There!" Lightning cries.

Several small ships speed past, knocking us all over with the force of the wind they bring with them. They dive down toward the massive ship below us before dispersing in all directions. Lightning gets to her feet first, staring out at the horizon.

"They're sealing off the area. They're trying to trap the stragglers," she explains, turning to face us as realization dawns over her face. "We've got to get moving before we're caught in the net."

"There's a way down over there." I point to a separate branch of the path. "I'm assuming heading up won't lead us out of here any quicker with the waves curled up like that."

Lightning nods, walking in the direction I pointed out. I'm quick to run right at her heels as she starts to quicken her pace, filled with a new determination to learn from her every move. Lightning… She knows what she wants and she fights for it. She's headstrong and she refuses to let others tell her what to believe or how to act. She protects herself for a living. Everything I dreamed of being before the Purge. I can't simply ignore the coincidence of her taking the place of the first person I followed like a lost puppy. But I'm not lost anymore—now, I know enough to have options. Killing _people_ may not be my favorite task but fighting to _survive_ is something only storybook characters get the chance at.

We turn another corner and I stumble to a stop to avoid running into Lightning's back, peering around her to see a pair of Sanctum soldiers. My heart leaps into my throat and I swallow it back down. _I have to do this. I have to. We have to be the ones who live._ I nod to reassure myself and kick my body into gear, rushing after Lightning and Sazh. I duck behind a slab of crystal and draw my daggers.

One of the PSICOM soldiers runs at Vanille, baton raised. She holds him back momentarily with a gust of wind; I take advantage of his holdup and my speed and ram into his stomach, knocking him back a few steps. With a flurry of slashes and clenched teeth, I tear into his thin armor, leaving hot streaks of blood staining my hands. He makes a feeble swing. I jump back out of the way and stretch out my hand, sending a ball of fire his way. A final rush of wind from Vanille sends him toppling over for good. I turn to see that Lightning and Sazh are tucking their weapons away. Hope watches with horror in his eyes as I wipe the blood on my hands off on my black leggings, nauseous at its warmth. _Metaphorically, it won't ever go away._ I shake the thought away, turning to face the curving path ahead. _Life isn't a metaphor._

"We need to hurry," I remind the others as Vanille and Sazh look over the bodies with strange expressions. Guilty. Sazh's dark eyes pierce mine and his lips part to ask a question, but I've turned to follow Lightning before he can speak. _I did it._ My stomach clenches tighter.

We run past crystalized flames and weapons and soldiers. Lightning and I electrocute drones until they lie on the ground sparking, and Vanille ensures that every little cut is healed before it can sting for too long. Broken vehicles and bridges create a path that funnels us to our destination: anywhere outside of PSICOM's clutches. Leaping up a jagged edge of crystal, Lightning nearly leaves all of us behind. Sazh groans, dragging himself up onto the second ledge of a series of five.

"Do we really have to go this way?" he complains as I climb up to the fourth, my thin arms trembling under the weight of my body as I push myself up. "I'm too old for this."

"C'mon, old man," Vanille teases, easily jumping up past me. I huff, taking a deep breath and hoisting myself up onto the final ledge only to see another ascent of small shelves.

"Hey, I may be a l'Cie, but I ain't getting any younger," Sazh fires back, reaching the same platform as me. "Whoa! How high is this thing? I don't think I'm gonna make it."

"At least you're not getting left behind," I point out, nodding toward Hope, who's nearly at the bottom. Suddenly, the cold mask I've been able to wear for the past thirty minutes slips and I feel bad for the guy. Sure, he's not exactly making it easy for us to pity him, but he's just lost everything he's ever known. Not everyone had who I did in their life. I fall to my knees, cocking my head to the side. "Come on, Hope! Get your legs up!"

"I'm… trying!" he grits, rolling onto the third shelf. Sazh sighs, shaking his head and starting after Lightning and Vanille. Hope pauses, glowering up at me. "Don't you have somewhere else to be?"

"Just one more and I'll pull you up," I call, ignoring his irritation. Huffing, he drags himself up onto the fourth ledge and irritably takes my lowered hand. I pull hard, falling onto my back once he's made it up. Unfazed, I get to my feet, grinning. "See? That wasn't so hard."

"Just… leave me alone."

My smile falls as he walks past, grunting as he pulls himself up. I bite down on my tongue to hold back a biting retort and run past him, pulling myself up twice as fast as he ever could. _A "thank you" would've been nice._ I take a deep breath. No, no. I can't think like that. I can follow Lightning's actions, but I can't follow the coldness. Cassie wouldn't want that. If he wants to push us away, fine. But we can't push him back. It doesn't work like that. It never has. He's lost everyone—all he needs is time before he tries to find another someone _, anyone._ I'd feel awful if at that point I'd already turned myself into an enemy. That's not who I am; not before, not now.

At the top, we're catching our breath as we lose it running after Lightning, who hardly bothered to slow her pace. Who thought she would? Certainly not me. I sigh, shaking my head as I keep up the pace, ignoring the burn in my legs. I wonder how long it will take us to reach the end of this l'Cie journey. At the end… will we be crystal? Will we live forever? Or will we be cursed as fal'Cie slaves like the others say? Is the crystal sleep what they mean by slavery? I glance over at Sazh and scoff at the sweat rolling down the side of his face. I guess time will only tell.


	8. Leading the Blind

"Whoa! This whole place is crystal!" Vanille gushes, pressing her hands to either side of her face as she peers down into a valley between two enormous ridges of shimmering blue crystal. I lean over at her side, watching the light shift across the angular surface of the frozen lake.

"It's so pretty," I nod. Lightning's eyes don't leave a pair of airships in the distance. Sazh steps closer, crossing his arms.

"I wonder what it would be like. To be crystal, I mean."

"You're gonna complete your Focus?" Vanille asks.

"Maybe. If I knew what it was. I probably don't want to know."

"Well, we only have three options that I can see," I shrug, cocking my head to the side. "We complete our Focus, we go Cie'th, or we die."

"No, there has to be another way," Hope objects, shaking his head.

"Let me know when you have a brilliant idea to add to the list," I retort dryly.

"Hey, Lightning," Vanille says, trying to ignore our bickering. "Did Serah say anything to you about her Focus?"

"… Nothing," Lightning replies in a surprisingly soft voice, running her fingers over the brand on her chest.

"Oh, you know what?" Vanille rushes, waving her arms in an effort to distract the soldier. "She probably didn't want you to worry."

"Or she didn't think she could trust me," Lightning says coldly, turning on her heels and continuing down the narrowing crystal path.

"Listen, there's no need to be all negative," Sazh chastises as we follow her.

"You're one to talk," I tease, earning a chuckle.

"Yeah, yeah. Respect your elders, kid."

"No time for that now, Pops."

Vanille giggles, shaking her head and watching the flickering lights of fire encased in crystal. The orange and red shadows cast on the opposite wall are eerie, ominous. I tear my eyes away and keep them dead ahead, trying to ignore that niggling feeling that I've done something _wrong_ and I need to find someone to apologize to. Someone to beg for forgiveness from. _But who?_

The winding tunnel opens up into a broad, expansive space, revealing the dark ceiling of the city yet again. An ominous gateway of crumbled pillars and arches greets us, surrounded by crystallized machines and soldiers. Vanille takes a deep breath, stunned by the scene. I feel my heart flutter; this is _terrifying._ We head up the stone stairs carefully, keeping an ear out for anyone who might have orders to kill on site. I don't miss the soft clinks of PSICOM uniforms. Sazh nods toward the fallen arches at the front of the structure.

"What's this? I feel like I recognize it from somewhere."

"Couldn't tell you," I shrug, awed by the wall of frozen fire that glows behind the whole building.

"Move," Lightning hisses, shoving us behind a wall.

The thump of boots passing by greets our ears just in time. I press my back to the wall, wiping my sweaty hands on my pants. _This woman is god-like._ Lightning watches them go from the shadows, holding her hand up to keep us silent. Hope holds his breath, fists clenched at his sides. Finally, Lightning lowers her hand and the boy gasps for air.

"The entrance is crushed. We'll have to walk around."

"Around the whole thing?" Vanille whispers, cautious. Lightning shakes her head.

"There's a passage around the inside."

"Okay. Sounds like a plan."

Quickly, we scurry in the opposite direction of the soldiers that passed, keeping close to the wall. Sazh nearly trips over me when I halt suddenly, trying not to crash into Lightning. She watches another pair of soldiers talk with their backs to us, thinking. _We can't stay; the patrol will catch us eventually._ I try to think like I was taught to, but I'm too nervous, afraid of death as it stares me in the face at every turn.

"Sazh," Lightning murmurs without looking back. "Do you have silencers?"

"No. Should, but I don't. Never had a reason."

"Damn." Lightning huffs, drawing her sword. "Stay here."

"Where are you…?!" Sazh hisses.

I freeze, watching her creep toward the soldiers. _If she screws up…_ Quickly, she rushed forward, slamming the end of her sword into one's head and ripping away their gun to smack the other across the face. Her blade whips around and pierces the chest of the first and we watch them fall, silently and efficiently. Sazh's eyebrows raise to his hairline and Vanille shoots Lightning a grin and a thumbs up. Hope looks ready to hurl.

"Let's move."

We hurry around the block, sticking to the shadows when needed. Lightning has no need to kill any more soldiers until we reach another open section, where we're forced to fight off two drones. Bolt spells from myself and Lightning do them over quickly. Hope eyes me sharply, distrustful.

"Why do you know so many ways to kill people?"

"What do you mean?" I huff, crossing my arms. "I'm just doing what comes naturally. Maybe you'd get that if you'd stop fighting it."

"I'm not gonna _embrace_ it. That's what the fal'Cie wants."

"Sure thing, bud. Why don't you ask to die while you're at it."

"Alright you two, knock it off." Sazh rolls his eyes, pushing my shoulder. "Give him a break. You _are_ taking this too easy."

"Am I? I don't want to _die_ or go Cie'th _,_ so I'm facing my only other option."

"I guess," he sighs, scratching the back of his head.

Vanille's eyes wander until she sees something that lights her cheery attitude up again. Brought back to life, she points a finger, grinning.

"Hey, hey! It looks like we can get through here!" she cries, rushing toward a small gap in the rubble. "That way we can cut right through!"

"Why don't we just loop around and make things easier on ourselves?" Sazh suggests, loathing the prospect of scaling the mound of rocks.

"Because there are soldiers everywhere. _Not_ easier," I point out, following Vanille.

Lightning scales the stones with little difficulty, to no one's surprise. I hurry after her, scraping my palms on the rough edges. Vanille isn't far behind me, looking back at Sazh as he offers his help to Hope, who turns him down stubbornly. His arms shake under his weight and his legs tremble as he tries to pull himself up. _Looks like he's never seen a health class in his life._ At the top, I catch my breath before gingerly stepping down the stones, careful not to trip and make a fool of myself. Hope is far less lucky, tumbling down the mound and scraping his hands and knees on the ground. He winces, dusting the dirt off his hands.

"Something's making the hairs on my neck stand up," Sazh grumbles as we head up a new set of stairs.

"You've got to stop worrying so much, Sazh!" Vanille teases, laughing to herself. When we reach the top of the steps, the glow of the flames around us awes us once more. "Wow," Vanille gasps over the sound of Sazh's panting. Laughing, Vanille rushes ahead.

"Stay close!" Lightning commands.

"I want to look around!" Vanille cries, smiling from ear to ear. She skips away.

We head toward the aircraft that rests on the ground about fifty feet away, ready to leave this horrid place. Something stops me, though. Goosebumps prickle up across my skin and my hair stands on end. _Something's coming._

" _Vanille!"_ I shout, rushing forward. She screams, scrambling away from the creature as it crashes into the ground. I snatch my daggers from my sides, skidding to a stop before the enormous beast.

"Over here!" Sazh calls, waving Vanille over.

I stand frozen in fear under the creature as it takes flight, spreading its thick, leathery wings alight with a blue glow. It has two faces on its rounded body; one with a bird-like beak, the other made of gnarled flesh and dagger-like teeth. I swallow the lump in my throat, feeling a cold sweat break out across my skin. Someone grabs my arm and jerks me back. Lightning steps forward, sword in hand.

"Stick to magic," she says sharply, throwing me a stern look. Snapping my mouth shut before I can protest, I nod.

Before either of us can attack, the monster swoops toward us, spinning its wings. I stumble backward, narrowly missing getting smacked over the head. Scrambling my feet, I stretch out a hand, meaning to hit it with fire. My head throbs as a hissing voice echoes through my head. _Garula. So that's what it's called._ I realize this creature, with its thick skin, won't be affected by magic at all in terms of damage, but I might be able to throw it off.

Nodding, I curl up a fist against the mark on my hip and throw my hand out, sending a wave of icy spears at the garula. They shatter against its skin, but it screams all the same. Lightning leaps through the air as if she's weightless, slashing at the monster's head over and over again, slinging blue blood onto the stone floor below. The crack of Sazh's guns nearly deafens me.

The garula shudders, throwing back its head, before lurching forward, sending out a ball of sparks that bursts over our heads. I grit my teeth as I'm forced to the ground, feeling searing hot bolts ripple across my skin. Suddenly, a splash of warmth halts the pain. I turn to see Vanille with her brow creased and a frown on her lips, concentrating. Lightning severs the garula's tail before it has a chance to recover from its spell. The shriek it releases pierces my ears like no other sound before. Hope cries out, holding his head tightly. Suddenly, the beast swoops away, turning its ugly face toward us as it smashes into the crystals, crying out all the way in its horrible voice.

"It's charging up," Lightning says, watching it go with narrowed eyes.

"Charging? What are you talking about?" Sazh demands, hurrying up to her side in an effort to read her. "Charging for what?" The garula swivels around to face us again, alight with rippling bolts of lightning sparking across its skin.

"For its last moments," she answers, flipping her blade around and firing off two shots at the beast. It rears its head, enraged at her refusal to die.

"It's put up a barrier," I warn, wincing at the pains in my head as information piles in like a computer. _Where's this coming from?_ "Be careful!"

Trusting my instincts, I let billows of air rush from my fingertips, pushing its wings this way and that to knock it off balance. Vanille joins in, allowing Sazh and Lightning to do the most damage they can. The sparks falter as Lightning buries her blade in its flesh and tears it free, allowing the sadistically curled edges to rip its skin. The barrier dissipates, and all it takes is one more leaping rush from the soldier to send it soaring away in a wailing, mangled mess.

Gasping for air, I press my hands to my knees, doubled over. Vanille cheers, rushing toward the airship once more.

"Check it out!" she cries, pointing. Enlivened by the sight, Sazh straightens, rolling his shoulders before he follows her to the ship. His hand hits my back gently.

"Come on. Hop to it, let's go!"

"This'll make things easier!" Vanille says cheerfully. Sazh eyes the machine skeptically, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, knowing our luck, it's probably missing an engine."

"You shouldn't be so negative," she admonishes, pushing him toward the ship.

"And you shouldn't get your hopes up."

Hope stumbles before doubling over, breathless. I frown. _You didn't even fight; calm down._ Sighing, I smooth down my hair, tug at my sleeve, and follow Sazh. He bangs on the door and it lowers a set of stairs. Taking a deep breath, he pokes his head inside, looking around.

"Looks intact," he grumbles, walking further in.

Vanille looks at me and I shrug, following her inside. There are two rows of seats decked with television systems and small, glossy windows. Sazh falls into the pilot's seat, rocking the ship. Lightning and Hope enter slowly, looking around. Slowly, everyone falls into a seat, waiting hopefully. Something Sazh presses whirs the ship to life and Vanille cheers, hitting his shoulder playfully.

"Told you to stay positive!"

"No, you told me not to be _negative_ ," Sazh corrects, though he can't wipe the smile off his face. "Let's get this girl into the sky!"


	9. Into the Garbage Heap

Vanille screams as the ship rocks, batted about the cavern by the missiles and rockets shot after us by the warships in pursuit. I cling to the back of her seat, pressed tightly against mine with my teeth grit and stomach clenched. Beams of light shine from overhead, blasting through the windows, and alarms wail all around us. _You've gotta be kidding me._

"Aw, no!" Sazh shouts, wrestling with the controls.

"Give me that!" Lightning shouts, leaning forward and grabbing a stick in the center of the panel that steers the ship.

"What?!" Sazh snaps. Hope squeezes his eyes shut as we're slammed into a rock wall. Bullets begin to pour from the turrets at the sides of our craft, blasting through the ships ahead in a blaze of smoke and fire.

"Did we get 'em?" Vanille asks eagerly, leaning forward.

"We got _one_ of them," Lightning huffs, scowling.

Sazh jerks the ship back into gear, speeding it up as we race across the skies, avoiding projectiles in hopes of reaching _some_ semblance of freedom from PSICOM's reach. Hope sticks his face to the window, turning back with sheer panic.

"They're still behind us!" he cries, terrified. Lightning grabs the wheel that steers the ship, impatient, and veers us sharply to the left, nearly sending Hope flying into my seat.

"Stop that!" Sazh wrestles it away from her just as one of the wings knocks a chunk of stone off a passing building. Lightning jerks it back with a grunt, veering us to the right. The screams of Hope and Vanille make me wish I could smack them both over the head. "Hey! I said stop!" Sazh elbows Lightning away a final time, putting both hands on the wheel. "You _want_ to die?!" he snaps, pulling us upward.

" _I_ don't!" Hope wails, gasping for air. "How are you gonna lose them?!"

"You've got me, kid!"

I gasp so sharply that my throat _burns_ as a spray of bullets cracks my window. Vanille screams again, covering her head with her arms.

"Then let me!" Lightning demands, refusing to back down.

"No, thank you!"

In a burst of blinding light, we clear the rocky caverns of the Hanging Edge and soar into the sky, passing wispy clouds and beams of the sunlight quickly, still escaping from the speeding ships around us.

"They're still on us?!" Sazh throws a look over his shoulder, horrified to see our pursuers haven't relented. We're thrown forward as the ship lurches; blood fills my mouth after my lip smacks the hard edge of Vanille's seat. "We're taking hits!" Suddenly, we begin to spiral downward. My stomach churns from all the twisting and turning and I hang on dizzily, unable to keep up with the motions. "Come on, gimme a break!" Swooping back and forth through the rocky walls we find ourselves between, the ship rumbles. "Hang on!" Sazh warns.

"Already there," I manage to call back.

Rocks begin to crumble before our way and I can't help my duck my head, squeezing my eyes shut as I wait for impact. The ship twists to the right, narrowly missing the debris, and the world rumbles with the sound of the airships behind us crashing and burning. Sazh pulls us back up into the sky and I sit back, catching breath I didn't know I was holding. Vanille lets out a small cheer, ready to encourage. No one wants to hear it. Hope sits back in his seat stiffly, still on edge. Even though we've hit smooth sailing, the ship bounces with turbulence as we fly, damaged.

"For the love of all that's good!"

Sazh groans, banging the board and leaning his head forward through his hologram screen. Electricity fizzles and crackles around his hair in protest. Screens pop up in front of our own faces, alight with the news presented from _somewhere_ in Cocoon. I wipe my bloody lip on my sleeve, watching as the image of a newswoman shows up.

"Next, an update on the status of the Purge. Just moments ago, the Sanctum announced the successful conclusion of the Purge, along with the safe arrival of the Cocoon migrants to their new homes on Pulse."

"A load of BS," I huff, crossing my arms.

"You kiss your mama with that mouth?" Sazh snaps, raising an eyebrow at me. I raise mine back.

"You gonna tell her?"

"Hush!" Vanille cries.

"Yes, that is correct." I jump, turning to see the primarch's face on my screen now. "There is no denying the enormity of the strain the Purge placed on us all. But, given the tens of millions of lives at stake, there truly was no alternative."

"Primach Dysley stood by the move, stressing the necessity of the relocation," a new news anchor reports, gesturing toward the Primarch's image. "When asked about the possibility of future Purges, the Primarch remained noncommittal, stating only that he would seek council with the fal'Cie Eden and weigh all options before making a decision."

"Yeah, that's right," Sazh mocks, disheartened. "If it makes the Sanctum look bad, it never even happened." The Primarch appears again.

"In all the centuries since the War of Transgression, Cocoon has been spared Pulse aggression, and prospered for it." He waggles a finger and I grimace at his long, yellowed nails. "It is essential that we maintain this peace. That is the Sanctum's focus. We will continue employing every resource available to combat these threats to the harmony of our society."

"Meaning, we'll be running for the rest of our lives," Sazh grumbles.

"Not if we don't go Cei'th first," I say under my breath. Hope shudders.

"Hey," Vanille speaks up.

"Yeah?"

"Um, who is this guy?" she asks, pointing to her screen. I frown, glancing at Hope. Even he looks confused. Sazh sighs hopelessly.

"I mean, what do they teach kids these days?" He turns to face her. "He's Galenth Dysley. The Sanctum Primarch. Murderer-in-chief."

"Just another tool for the fal'Cie," Lightning mutters.

"According to our insta-poll, nearly ninety percent of Cocoon's citizens agree with the Sanctum's handling of the Purge. Seventy percent of the respondents said they would also support additional Purges were the need to arise." The news anchor smiles pleasantly as though the words leaving her mouth are happy news of peace and prosperity. Sazh grunts, disgusted.

"Let's Purge everybody. _That'll_ fix it!"

Before anyone can respond, alarms begin to blare and a red light flashed throughout the cabin. I look in the window to see if anyone is following us. _Not again..._ Sazh sighs, pushing the ship into top speed.

"Points for perseverance," he huffs.

I grimace, covering my eyes as we fly right up toward the sun—our "sun". As we breach the clouds, Vanille gasps. A behemoth of a being looms in the sky, complete with a core licking white-hot flames.

"A Sanctum fal'Cie up close and personal. Cocoons own light in the sky," Sazh muses. Gritting his teeth, he dodges another spray of bullets.

"Fly in!" Lightning calls, leaning forward. "We'll lose them in there."

Sazh obeys, twisting the ship around beams of crackling light that illuminate the core. The ships that follow are electrocuted, disintegrating into dust almost instantly.

"I like this fal'Cie!"

"There's more of them!" Vanille warns. The chocobo chick in Sazh's hair peeks its head up, chirping loudly. We're whipped forward suddenly as the tail end of the ship catches a beam on our way out of the core, sending us soaring toward the ground.

"Hang on tight!" Sazh shouts over the alarms.

I don't hesitate, gripping the sides of my seat and clenching my teeth, ready to crash. Hope screams, his knuckles white on the back of Lightning's seat as he braces himself. For once, I can't blame his terror. The first time we hit the ground, we bounce. The second time, we tumble, rolling over and over and over again until there's glass flying everywhere. A final blow hits the front of the ship and my hands slip just as it all goes dark.

When I wake up, my entire body aches from the scrapes and bruises. My head pounds relentlessly, so I take it slow, blinking my eyes open before I push myself up with my arms. Lightning kneels, rubbing her neck and looking around at the rest of us. Seeing Hope out cold beside her, she stretches out a hand and shakes him.

"Hey."

 _There's something coming._ The scratching of claws against stone catches my ears and I hurry to my feet, unsteady. Lightning draws her sword, heading toward the source of the sound. I follow, ignoring my aching bones and pulling my daggers free, ready to help. The first of the pack shows up, the dog-like beasts the Sanctum uses to hunt their prey for them. The same creatures that attacked me, Vanille, and Hope in the Vestige earlier. _Was that today?_ Shaking my head, I hurry to catch up to her, watching the beasts snarl. Behind me, I hear Vanille shaking the others awake.

"Ready!" she cries, scrambling to Lightning's other side and snapping her staff into place. I can hear Sazh behind me, drawing his guns.

"Gotta keep you kids safe, right?"

I rush forward the same time Lightning does, heading in the opposite direction to avoid her sweeping blade. Vanille sends blasts of air their way, stunning them. Stepping out of the way of slashing claws, I feel my daggers begin to grow hot as flames lick across the blades. Determined, as the creature bounces back, I rush forward, digging ruthlessly into its skin and tearing away. It snaps at me, unable to reach. I kick my foot into its side, pressing hard enough to knock it down long enough that I can plunge a dagger into the top of its head, effectively stopping any resemblance of life it once held.

Lightning kicks the last one off the end of her sword and steps back, sheathing it. Vanille breathes out a sigh of the relief, stumbling away.

"Glad that's over," she admits, exhausted. She falls to the ground, lying on her back and staring up at the dark sky.

"Man, I'm beat," Sazh puffs, sitting beside her.

Lightning stands, walking away, and so I stand. Hope barely makes it to his feet, dusting himself off. I glance over to make sure he's alright, crossing my arms and waiting for Lightning's next move. She's the clear leader here; the rest of us are lost.

"What, no break?" Sazh demands, hardly able to catch his breath.

My body cries for rest, but I refuse to give in. _You can handle a lot more than you think._ He always told me that. I'll never forget it. I'll never be _weak_ because I can't say no to what I want at the moment. And so, I'll follow Lightning.

"They're tracking us," Lightning points out. Sazh scoffs.

"I know that. I _know_ that! But _we_ aren't soldiers. We don't have your kind of stamina!"

"You got enough to complain," she retorts.

"Oh, that's—!" Sazh mutters to himself, dissatisfied with her response. I shrug, tugging my hair back into place. "Forget it!" he shouts, waving a hand at the soldier as she walks away.

"I think, um..." Hope starts, uncertain. _Don't..._

"I'd stick with her if I were you," Sazh sighs.

"Later, then," Hope nods.

Huffing, I follow Lightning before he can irritate me by merely _existing_. Lightning leaps over an engine as if it's no issue. Determined to keep up, I dig my daggers in and use them as picks, dragging myself over the rusted edges. When Hope stops at its base, panting, I pretend I can't see him, hoping he'll go away. It's cruel, I guess, but I have to stay focused if I want to survive. I roll my eyes when I hear him hit the ground behind me.

"Amarhi, wait!" he calls, scrambling to his feet and running after me unsteadily. I have no choice now that's he's drawn attention to me. Now that's he's asked for help. I'd feel too guilty. _Dang it._ I turn with my hands on my hips, impatient.

"She's not going to wait for us, you know."

"I know," he puffs, taking a deep breath once he catches up. "Let's go."

We race up the path, panting. I turn the corner first, slowing upon seeing Lightning's back. Hope trips over my foot, stumbling, but he catches himself.

"Just you two?" she asks, not bothering to look.

"For now, I guess," Hope answers.

"Were you hoping they'd be scared enough to keep up?"

"Maybe that they'd care enough to keep out of trouble," she mutters.

"Should we wait?" Hope asks, looking back nervously.

"They'll catch up. Eventually." Lightning keeps moving, dismissive.

Her stride is long as she takes off again in a jog, her narrow cape of crimson cloth flapping behind her as a beacon of her location should she pull too far ahead. I take a deep breath, attempting to ease the cramp in my side, and hurry after her. The sky is a dark shade of blue, sprinkled with the flickering lights of a thousand stars I've never seen before. _Are those all projections, too? They must be, unless we're under the break..._ I sigh, feeling my heart sink. I guess I never thought about it before—everything we see as nature is nothing more than a protective projection from the fal'Cie. Is anything we experience real? It makes me feel manufactured like the rest of Cocoon, fake. Garbage. I shake my head, concentrating on the motion of running and trying to ignore Hope's wheezing. _This isn't the time._

"All the junk around here came from Pulse, didn't it?" Hope asks, panting. Lightning pretends she didn't hear him.

"Had to have," I answer, looking over the mountains of rusty, other-worldly machines. "I've never seen anything like this, except maybe in textbooks." I frown, turning my head to look at him and slowing unintentionally. "But... How did it all get here?"

"The War?"

He tugs at the teal bandana around his neck, trying to breathe easier. Sweat drips down his face and I have to wrestle a smile, thanking everything above us that I was determined to become a soldier and join my brother. Two more years without this nightmarish interruption and I might have made it. _I might still make it._ The twist in my gut tells me otherwise.

"Pay attention!" Lightning snaps, drawing her sword and rushing toward a green-streaked beast just like the ones we fought minutes ago.

Eager as ever to please, I hurry forward and throw out a palm. The burning in my hip travels up my side and into my arm in the blink of an eye, scorching my fingertips as a burst of electricity shoots forth. The creature, a _thexteron_ as I'm so graciously told, shudders, the shocks rolling through its body. The momentary delay is long enough for Lightning to run at it with her sword and plunge into its body. A hot burst of flames erupts from my right and burns across the thexteron's skin. Surprised as it falls to the ground, dead, I turn to see Hope clutching his boomerang in one hand and staring _hard_ at the dead animal.

"You finally did it," I say in disbelief. He swallows hard, trying to speak, but all he manages to do is look at me before awkwardly tucking the boomerang away and rubbing the back of his neck.

"Let's keep moving," Lightning calls, pushing her sword into its sheath on the back of her thighs smoothly and picking up the pace again.

We come to a rusty bridge that leads around the tops of two aircraft that hardly have anything left to them. Lightning and I jump across the gap in the center; Hope takes a little longer, to no one's surprise. I slow only to look up at the sky, watching the outline of the fal'Cie's fortress in the sky glitter behind the clouds. Hope leans forward and looks around at the landscape of trash.

"This stuff is what was left over from the scrap the fal'Cie took from Pulse to repair Cocoon," he says, eyes alight with wonder. _I bet he sits by himself at lunch._ I shake my head, rolling my eyes. _No, he's probably got a group of people that he hangs around. They probably don't like him._ That makes me feel a bit better, so I tear my eyes away from the sky and head deeper into the darkness.


	10. Deeper and Darker

_~6 years before~_

 _Gasping for air, I sprint around the corner, my heart racing in my chest. The jeers of dozens of children cause the tears that drip from my eyes to my chin. A short scream stings my throat as a hand presses into my shoulder blade and sends me sprawling into the dirt face first. I roll over and raise my hands to protect my face; I'm not quick enough. A little boy's fist hits me square in the eye, his other hand clutching the collar of my shirt. I kick at him, trying to squirm free. Someone else kicks me in the side. I scream again, spitting into the boy's face and shoving him off when he lets go to wipe his cheek._

 _I scramble to my feet, winded, and run as fast as I can to the only place I know I can find safety: my home. I look back to see that the boy and two of his friends are hot on my heels. My heart skips a beat and I make a sharp left turn into my neighborhood. An old man stops mowing his lawn to watch the three of us run by. I suppose he thinks we're only playing despite the tears staining my cheeks and the blood dripping from my nose. Shouting for help, I bang my fist on my front door and watch my pursuers come closer and closer. Suddenly, the door swings inward and Cid's standing there expectantly. The second he pieces the puzzle of my appearance together, he grips my arm and pushes me inside, stepping onto the porch as the children skid to a stop on our empty driveway._

 _"Hey! Get her back out here!" the boy demands._

 _"Go home," Cid says firmly, ignoring snickers of the other two kids. I peer around the corner of the doorframe. "Go, before I call the authorities."_

 _"What, you gonna call the Guardian Corps on us?" the little boy snorts._

 _"I could," Cid shrugs. "I've got friends. Wouldn't be too hard to get them to take care of some spoiled brats." He's lying, I think with a sniffle. But they're too stupid to realize, aren't they? The boy looks back at his friends, another boy and a younger girl, and laughs, but he's hesitant. "But it might be easier to call your parents." At this, all their faces fall._

 _"No, don't!" the girls pleads. "I'm sorry, we were just having some fun!"_

 _"Yeah!" shouts the other boy. "It's not our fault she's a crybaby!"_

 _"Go home," Cid repeats patiently. The first boy, the leader, spits into the grass, rolls his eyes, and turns on his heels._

 _"C'mon, guys. She's gonna hide like a baby."_

 _"Let's go get popsicles!"_

 _"Oh, that sounds good!"_

 _Cid heads back inside, not bothering to look at me as he strides past and enters the kitchen. Picking up a washcloth from a drawer, he runs cold water over the rough material before turning to face me finally. Silently, I walk over and wait before him, staring down at the smooth wooden floor. My face jerks upward when he pushes it up, roughly scrubbing the blood off my face. I wince, trying to pull away, but his hand's too strong._

 _"Stop moving," he commands sharply._

 _"It hurts!" I protest, lifting my hands to push his away. He pinches my wrists together, scowling down at me._

 _"This wouldn't have happened if you had run to begin with."_

 _"What?" I frown, feeling my heart pick up speed._

 _"But you had to fight back, didn't you?" he continues sternly, his glare never leaving my face even when my gaze falls to the floor. "Amarhi?"_

 _"They were beating up Kaley!" I shout, stomping my foot on the floor indignantly. "I just wanted to help!"_

 _"What's going on?" Cassie asks, walking into the kitchen. Her smile falls upon seeing my face. "Amarhi!"_

 _"Don't pick fights you can't win," he replies coldly, handing the cloth to Cassie when she offers her hand. "You just made her life ten times harder."_

 _"How can you live like that?" I snap, shoving my sister's hands away. She shoots me a strict look before gently washing the blood off my nose. "You can't win any fights if you run from them all!"_

 _"Some people aren't fit for fighting," he bites back._

 _"Teach me how, then," I demand, crossing my arms. "I won't go picking on people like those guys; I want to help."_

 _"Absolutely not," Cassie replies firmly._

 _"You're too young," he shakes his head, leaning a hip against the counter and rolling up the sleeves of his white shirt._

 _"I'm eight!" I protest. "You started training when you—"_

 _"You're not joining the military," he counters, scowling. "And I was twelve. Ask Mom to sign you up for self-defense classes if you really want, but I'm not going to teach you."_

 _"You're the only person I want to teach me," I plead, clutching both his hands in mine. "Maybe I will join the Guardian Corps, Cid. It's the perfect job for me."_

 _"Absolutely not," Cassie repeats sharply._

 _"You can't tell me what to do," I reply, crossing my arms. "Besides, you always told me to do what makes me happy. If protecting others makes me happy, let me do it."_

 _"No."_

 _"Why not?"_

 _"Because you're doing this to prove a point."_

 _"No, I'm not. I'm serious. Cid, please?"_

 _"..." Cid sighs, brushing his black bangs from his face. "You're sure?"_

 _"Positive," I nod, placing my hands on my hips and flashing a grin._

 _"Well then," he says. Cassie steps back, twisting the rag between her fingers. Suddenly, Cid lunges for me, grabbing the back of my legs and hanging me over his back. I scream, startled, and grip the back of his shirt. Cassie laughs. "Only once you hit the double digits, yeah?"_

I double over, gasping for air. Hope's arms seal up as he casts a healing spell over them with trembling fingers, shaking both from the shock and the electricity. The watch drones we destroyed lie on the ground as empty shells, cut open and dented. Their long, stringy limbs still crackle with the sparks that nearly sucked the life from Hope. I can still hear his blood-curdling scream echoing around my head when I squeeze my eyes shut. Lightning spares him a glance to make sure he's still alive and keeps moving. Hope, pale, looks for me to slow down, but I can't. Not until I physically cannot go any farther.

We come upon that stretch much faster than I thought we might. As Hope still struggles to get down from the mound of garbage Lightning and I jumped down, I stare up at the vertical wall of junk in our way. Lightning heads toward it, unfazed. That's when I realize I might not be able to make it any further. _This can't be it._ Hope finally catches up, flopping down onto a nearby rock. I grit my teeth, swallowing the lump in my throat as I stare straight up to the top of the wall. _I have to. I can't die here._

"Can we get through this way, you think?" Hope asks, panting. "You... know where you're going, right?"

"I've been here on missions before."

"Missions? Doing what?" I ask, wishing I could perk up at the sound of new information.

"I can't say."

"Nothing the do with the Purge, though?" Hope raises his eyebrows, nervous as he leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

"The Purge is PSICOM's baby." She paces toward the wall, arms crossed. "Our military is split into two arms." As she begins to climb, my stomach tightens. "The Public Security and Intelligence Command, known as PSICOM..." She pauses to look over both of us. "And the Guardian Corps. I was Guardian Corps, Bodhum Security Regiment."

"Wait, but I don't get it," Hope says, leaning forward. "If you're not PSICOM, then why did you board the train?" I frown, resting my hands on my hips as I peer up at the soldier. _She was put on the Purge train because she was in Bodhum, right?_

"For Serah," she replies, something like guilt reflecting in her voice. _She wasn't fast enough..._ "I had to rescue Serah before they transported the Vestige to Pulse, and out of my reach. My only chance to save her was to join the Purge."

"You're telling me you got on that train so you could save your sister?" Hope gives a weak laugh, shaking his head. "That's crazy. I could never do something like that."

"No?" I frown, looking at him over my shoulder. "I would've given—" I stop, realizing the words coming out of my mouth. "If my sister was there," I finish quickly under my breath, turning my eyes to the ground as my face goes red.

"It's not a question of can or can't," Lightning cuts in. "There are some things in life you just do."

"Easy for someone like you to say," he huffs. She scoffs, turning to head up the wall. I hurry to catch her before she goes, painfully dragging myself up the first step.

"Wait!" I quickly get to my feet, covered in dirt. "If you're GC, do you know General Raines?"

"Cid Raines?" she frowns, eyeing me. "What do you know about him?"

"Just the name," I lie.

"... He's not in Bodhum," is all she says before leaping up the rest of the way.

"Lightning!" Hope calls hopelessly, springing to his feet. "She left us..."

Desperate, in an attempt to claw my way up a wall that's too steep, I lose my grip and come tumbling back down to the bottom at Hope's feet. Frustrated, I roll to my knees and beat the ground with my fist, suppressing the urge to scream.

" _Dammit_!" I scream, kicking the wall. A sharp pain shoots up my leg and I grit out a frustrated cry, tugging at my hair.

"Hey, calm down!" Hope calls, anxious. "Something will hear you."

"She was our last hope!" I scream, throwing a hand up at the last place the soldier was seen. "Don't you get that?!"

"What about Sazh and Vanille?"

"They don't know how to fight," I groan, pacing like a caged animal. My chest swells with anger and defeat, and tears begin to pool in my eyes. "I had to get back to them so I could see him again but now I can't, and I can't join the GC either because of this whole l'Cie mess, and that's the only thing I've ever wanted and I've been training for it my whole _life_!" I rant, kicking the wall again to feel the pain one more time.

"Get back to who?"

"My parents," I huff, crushed. Scrubbing my face with the back of my arm and smudging mud across my forehead, I sink to the ground, pressing my back to a rusted sheet of metal. "I wanted to see my brother."

"You have a brother?"

"Yeah?" I raise an eyebrow. "I've known you for what, a day? Don't sound so surprised that you don't know everything about me." Hope frowns, picking at the laces on his boots. "I don't see him anymore because he's busy, but I miss him. He's probably the only thing I care about now that my future's gone to shit." I sigh, feeling my heart flutter. _My mom would beat me if she heard the way I was talking._

"..."

"Sorry." I pull my knees to my chest. "It's just... we've lost so much in the past day, and I really just want to pretend nothing happened so that everything goes back to normal."

"... Me too." Hope glances up at me and forces the corner of his mouth up into a weak smile.

I sigh and let my head fall back against the sheet metal. It gives off a dull clunk. Hope leans back on the palms of his hands and stares up at the skies, brows furrowed as we search for any semblance of hope. _What do we do now? Where do we go?_ I let my eyes close, daring to let the exhaustion set in now that I can't do anything else. Before I can get too comfortable, I hear the sound of approaching footsteps. Thinking that Lightning has returned, I leap to my feet and look up, only to realize that the sound is coming from the other direction. Disappointment floods my heart, but it's still nice to see familiar faces.

"We made it!" Vanille cheers, catching her breath. Sazh looks around, confused.

"Where's Grumpy?"

"She left us," I sigh, pointing up at the wall. Hope nods, slouching.

"Got left behind, huh?" Sazh pats Hope's back. The boy jerks away, standing.

"Leave me alone!" he huffs, walking away from Sazh, sulking. I frown; what happened between now and when we were just talking? "This is pointless, isn't it? Can't keep up. Can't go home. It's over for me." He looks over his shoulder at me. "At least you can fight."

"It's _not_ over," Vanille insists, leaning over to catch his eye. "We'll get you home!"

"I don't have one. Now that Mom is—" My heart skips a beat. _At least he knows._

"What about your dad?" Vanille presses, her voice quieting. Hope shakes his head, scowling.

"My mom and I... When we were in Bodhum, they sealed off the town and we couldn't get back to Palumpolum. They forced us onto the train with everyone else. My mom, she was frantic. She wanted to get us home, so she tried to fight. She got tricked. By _Snow._ " He turns sharply, angry. "He used her!"

Vanille stammers for a moment before forcing a smile.

"Let's get you home, okay? Your dad's _gotta_ be worried!"

"Let him worry," Hope argues, crossing his arms. "Why should I care? He doesn't." I chew on the inside of my cheek, trying to understand what that would be like. _A father who doesn't care... A son who doesn't need him..._

"Any father cares," Sazh murmurs.

"Sazh?" Vanille frowns, stepping away from Hope.

"I-It's nothing, forget it," the pilot stammers, scratching the back of his head. Something catches his eye and he heads toward a lever on the wall. I press my lips together, watching Vanille rush back over to Hope.

"Come with me, okay?" She presses a hand to his back, leading him toward me and Sazh.

"This outta do it," Sazh mutters, shoving the lever. It creaks, and with a flash of light, it shoots out an anchor that grasps a large chunk of metal, dragging it closer. Startled, we stumble out of the way. Finally, the rumbling stops and a path is set before us. "We've got time," Sazh reminds us. "We'll get you _all_ back home. And Hope, your dad'll be happy to see you."

Sazh leads the way up the new sort of stairway he's created up the way with the rubble, keeping the pace slow but steady. I pull myself up after him, dusting the rust stains off my hands with a grimace. _What will I do once I get home? What can I do?_ Part of me wants to believe that my parents are on their way back, safe and sound, worried sick. Calling my brother to see what he knows. Checking the news. Maybe they've seen the mess I've gotten myself into. But the rest of me knows better. There are higher chances of me sprouting wings than there are of them surviving the Hanging Edge.

"So, where's home for you, kid?" Sazh asks me, looking over his shoulder at me.

"Same place; Palumpolum."

"Really? You know Hope before comin' here?"

"No. We grew up on separate sides of town."

"Ah. Big city." Sazh turns to pull me up the next section as it towers over my head. "Here, I'll help you up."

"Thanks."

He heaves Hope up as well, pressing a thin smile onto his face when Hope refuses to look at him. Sighing, I continue up the path, taking Sazh's place in front.

"And where are your parents?"

"..." I take a deep breath, uncertain. "I don't know."

"Pardon?"

"They were on that Purge train somewhere," I answer, shrugging. "But... I don't know. I don't think they're alive, but I don't _want_ to think they're dead."

"Keep hopin'," Sazh sighs, patting my shoulder. "We made it out alive, didn't we? Old man and a buncha kids?" _Under much different circumstances._

"Yeah."

We head further up the path, ducking around any mechanical creatures in the area, not looking for a fight when Lightning's not around. I'm sure we could handle it, but I don't want to force the rest of the group into something they don't want to do. We've had enough of that already. Hope drags his feet, but the pace is set slow enough that we can easily keep together despite his low spirits. Entering under a gateway of curved iron arches, we're suddenly alerted to a nearby enemy by a series of squawks and shrieks. I hardly have the chance to pull my weapon out before I'm bowled over, lying on my back in the dirt. Hope cries out to my right and I hear the snap of his boomerang unfolding.

"Guess we have to fight!" he calls. Sazh scoffs and I hear a round of shots go off.

"Yeah, you think?"

Blinking to clear my head, I roll to my feet, watching the strange towering birds dance about on one foot, swaying to a rhythm in their heads and twirling their violet wings about in some strange ritual. _Incubus._ As soon as the name enters my head, I feel the cool rush of water through my hand, splashing the birds in a sharp, angled shot. They cry out, dripping miserably. Before they can do much else, I use my other hand to shoot forth a bolt of lightning, watching the smoke erupt from their ruffled feathers.

Sazh keeps shooting, though I can tell he's keeping an eye on me and Hope. Vanille follows my lead, and from the corner of my eye, I see Hope hurl his boomerang at one bird, raising his hand to call it back. _Getting brave, huh?_ The incubus he struck shakes its head to clear the annoying pain, but a second wave of shots from Vanille renders it weak enough for Sazh to put a bullet through its head. _These aren't machines anymore... They're Pulse monsters._ The second is quickly killed through the same strategy. Hope tucks his boomerang away, glancing over at me. I catch his eye, sighing when he looks away. _Here we go._

"What?" I demand, sick of his pointed stares and confused frowns.

"I just don't get it," he huffs, holding on of his wrists awkwardly. "How do you always know what to do?" _I should be more careful._

"I don't," I shake my head, following Sazh toward a glowing tower of airship debris further ahead. "I just lean into it, I guess. I never know what the magic's about to do." _It's not a lie._ "I trust it."

"Trust what? The fal'Cie?"

"Whatever it is in my body that's making this stuff and propelling it out," I shrug. "If I control it, things, go out of whack."

"Everyone here's crazy," he scoffs, crossing his arms and speeding up. I roll my eyes, slowing so he can get some distance between us. _Moodiest kid I've ever met._


	11. Choosing Sides

"Isn't that a...?" Vanille stops, staring up at the rubble.

"A warship from Pulse," Sazh answers confidently, cocking his head to the side.

"You mean, they made it this far?" she asks, clasping her hands behind her back.

"Of course not," he scoffs, waving his hands as if he's batting her words from the air. Sighing, I rest my hands on my hips."Not during the war, not since. They might've tried, but none of their forces made it into Cocoon. They only damaged the outer rim. Then the Sanctum's fal'Cie pushed 'em back. What, you'd, uh, sleep through History?"

"More or less," Vanille giggles.

"Then how'd all this stuff get here?" I step forward, genuinely curious. This isn't textbook stuff, not by a long shot. "The wildlife and the trash?"

"Pulse fal'Cie needed it to rebuild," Sazh shrugs.

"But what's the _ship_ doing here?" Vanille presses.

"Once the war was over, people couldn't live near the rim anymore," Hope speaks up, clutching his other arm like a security blanket. "In places like the Hanging Edge. So the fal'Cie, they gathered up scrap from Pulse, and used it for building here. This is what was left: a bunch of garbage."

"Who'da thunk? A Pulse fal'Cie and who-knows-what, mixed in with all the trash?" Sazh muses.

"Who'da thunk..." Vanille repeats under her breath, looking disappointed. _What else do you need to know?_

"How did no one find it for so long?" I frown. "Lightning said she'd been here on missions before with the GC; how did something so huge stay hidden?"

"They weren't lookin' for it," Sazh shrugs. "Can't think of why they would spot it, even if it was under their noses. Everything around here's foreign; who's to say it wasn't just another hunk-a-junk machine?" Shaking his head, he begins to lead the way up the long, metal path when Vanille rushes past him.

"I'm gonna go look ahead!" she calls cheerfully.

"Do me a favor: stop wandering off and stay where I can keep my eye on you," Sazh snaps, huffing. "Kid doesn't even know where she is."

"And you do?" I retort playfully, raising an eyebrow. He shoots me a look, but it's not unfriendly .

"Keep your attitude in check."

"Will do, Pops."

We hurry on, ducking our heads and running past human-shaped robots with bludgeoning arms and the dancing birds, not looking for a fight. My eyelids are as heavy as the shoes on my feet; I'd give anything to be allowed an hour of sleep without the threat of big bad Pulse monsters and soldiers hot on our heels. _The whole world's against us._ Behind me, I hear the panting of Hope as he tries to keep up with our quickened pace; ahead of me, I see Vanille swinging her arms and skipping past every creature obliviously, happy as ever. _Such a weird group for the fal'Cie to choose._ I almost snort. Two kids, an old pilot, a reckless rebellion leader, a grumpy retired soldier, and some ditsy girl from another universe altogether. What a crew.

I'm jerked out of my thoughts when a movement ahead startles me. My hands touch the sides of my legs, reaching for that comforting weight when I realize it's Lightning, returning from her trek across the mountains of trash.

"Hey, welcome to the party!" Sazh greets, grinning.

"You miss us?" Vanille asks.

Lightning scoffs, turning and heading further along the path ahead of us. Sazh huffs, turning toward the rest of us.

"Would it _kill_ her to smile?"

This time, Lightning stays with us, though she picks up the pace a fair bit, running along the path, ready to strike down whatever crosses her. We head up a rattling ramp and cross a long bridge of concrete. I hang back with Hope, guilty. _I'm as bad as the rest of them_. He doesn't so much as look at me, ashamed, but I keep my thoughts to myself.

My heart sinks when I pass by a bloodied incubus, realizing that the others are fighting without us. The battles remind me of home, not because I was fighting any wildlife, but because of my brother. All the days we spent training as he pushed me, and I got frustrated because I couldn't keep up with a seasoned soldier who was twelve years older than me. I miss those days—and they're never coming back.

I push the pace a little bit as I find more and more dead creatures, wanting to stay close to the group. If something ambushed me and Hope out here and I was forced to fight alone, I'm not sure we would make it. The most he adds to the fight is a smack from his boomerang here or there, and sometimes, if we're lucky, a little flicker of fire the size of a candle wick fluttering to burn a hair off the enemy's head. I take a deep breath, getting sick of the sound of his heavy breathing. I _almost_ regret hanging back.

Far ahead, I suddenly hear a loud clanging and a scream from Vanille.

"What's going on up there?" Hope asks, scared. I shake my head.

"I dunno. Doesn't sound good, though."

"Maybe we should... wait?"

"Are you kidding?"

I roll my eyes and run ahead, impatient. _This is what I get for being nice to the coward._ Skidding to a stop, I nearly tumble headfirst into the fiery hole in the ground, holding out an arm to warn Hope to stop. Shielding my eyes from the flames, I peer down into the hole, just able to make out Lightning, who leaps through the smoke, cutting rusty gears free from the enormous machine that's attacking them.

"A dreadnought," I mutter.

"What?"

"That's what it is," I reply, watching it creak and crumble under its own weight, leaving behind scorch marks and small fires all over the ground.

Carefully, I begin to climb down the slide of the steep decline, letting my hands go and letting the loose stones and dirt slide me the rest of the way down. I stumble, but catch myself, hurrying to join the others. Vanille wipes the sweat off her face, tucking her wand away.

"Pulse is crawling with things like that, isn't it?" Sazh asks, eyeing the rusty robot.

"Got me," Lightning sighs, resting a hand on her hip. "Not even the Corps has access to intel on Pulse. Soldiers in the field fight blind."

"Why? Isn't that more dangerous?" I ask, stepping forward. Sazh glances at me over his shoulder.

"Well, nice of you to join us again."

"Target's a target," Lightning answers dismissively.

"You like to keep it simple, don't you?" the pilot scoffs, crossing his arms.

"I stick to my goal."

"And as long as you have a goal, you can fight?"

I jump, startled by Hope's voice behind me.

"You can stay alive," Lightning corrects, finding a new path to follow. _She keeps personal problems out of it... But how?_

The doors before her part and we head up a steep ramp. My legs are _burning_ by the time we reach the top. Vanille takes a deep breath, grinning.

"This looks like easy going!" she says cheerfully.

"Easy?" I puff. Sazh chuckles.

"Finally met your match?"

"To a _hill?_ You wish, old man."

The path winds around another mound of garbage, leading into a valley of sorts. The stuffy, rust-scented air is starting to make my head spin. The sight before us when we clear the trash takes my breath away, erasing all annoyance from the panting and the sweat and the smells. A Pulse ship lies ahead, looming over a gleaming pool of mysterious fluid that glows a deep shade of blue, illuminating the whole area. The ship is long gone, but something about the scene gives me hope.

Lightning climbs up the hull of the ship as if it's nothing but a hill. To everyone's surprise, she sits at the top rather than leaping from the heights into another dimension for the next hour. Sazh follows her and, exhausted, I decide to stay on the ground with Hope and Vanille while the two above us talk, Vanille stretches, making irritating whining sounds with every movement. _Do you really have to do that?_

"Not much of a future for us, huh?" I hear Sazh say over my head. Scoffing, I slump against the hunk of metal, hugging my arms to my body tightly. _Hypocrite._

"Hard to picture a happy ending."

"We don't even know where to go."

"I do." Lightning's words pique my interest and I straighten, backing up so I can see them. She stands and turns to the sky. "There." Above us looms a bright, glowing fortress in the sky—another fal'Cie.

"Eden?" Sazh chuckles. "The Sanctum's seat of power. Oh, that's a great idea. Just charge right in there. Give 'em a taste of l'Cie terror!" Sick of being stuck on the outside, I begin to climb, ignoring the ache in my muscles as I drag myself up. "You're serious," Sazh realizes, stunned. I roll onto the landing clumsily, quickly recovering and brushing the rust off my knees.

"Keep running," Lightning retorts. "It's die or turn Cei'th." She paces toward me with a determined look in her eye. "There's no place for l'Cie to hide. No... They want a fight? Let's take it to the Sanctum's door!"

"This isn't a game!" Sazh cries, throwing his arms out to the side.

"No, it's not," I butt in. "She's right. If we keep pretending it is, then we'll never get anywhere."

"This ain't your call," he snaps.

"Why, because I'm a _kid?_ " I cross my arms, scowling. "I'm a l'Cie just like you. This is my problem, too."

"It started with Serah. The fal'Cie took her." Lightning shakes her head. Behind me, I hear Vanille and Hope climbing up to join us. "Now I'm a l'Cie too. And the Sanctum's hunting me, an enemy of the state. But who's pulling their strings?" She jerks her head back up the sky. "A fal'Cie. Eden."

"Cocoon's Sustainer and Guiding Light," I recite, kicking at a rusty bolt.

"It probably ordered the Purge, too. Pulse and Sanctum fal'Cie? They're all the same. And we're all the same to them: expendable." Lightning shakes her head, as Vanille and Hope watch in silence, trying to wrap their heads around what she's suggesting. "I'm not dying a fal'Cie slave."

"So? What're you gonna do?" Sazh asks, challenging her.

"Destroy it."

I knew the words were coming, but once I hear them, my lungs nearly collapse in on themselves when my breath is stolen and my heart begins to pound. Sazh's face shifts into one of pure bewilderment and Vanille stares, dumbfounded.

"By yourself? What, are you crazy?!" Sazh shakes his head. "Say you pull it off, hm? What's that get you? Satisfaction? Something happens to Eden, it's lights out Cocoon!" He pauses, cocking his head to the side. "You _want_ that. You're a Pulse l'Cie now, so you just want to snuff out Cocoon!"

"No!" Vanille cries, stepping forward. "What about Serah? She said to save Cocoon! It might even be out Focus to make sure Cocoon stays—"

"Our Focus doesn't matter!" Lightning argues. "I don't take orders from fal'Cie." _This might be the only chance I'll get to see him again._ "How I live is up to me."

"Don't you mean how you die?" Sazh corrects.

"Think like that, and it's already over." Something shifts in Hope's demeanor as if something _clicks_ in his head. "Better to pick your path and keep moving." She turns to Sazh. "Don't worry. I'm after the Sanctum; I'm not out to destroy the world." She scoffs. "If it did come to that, wonder if our 'hero' would try to stop me."

"You wanna fight _Snow_ now?" Sazh demands, as if this is getting ridiculous. Actually, it's all starting to make sense. "Just like that, and you're enemies?" Lightning rolls her eyes.

"Next time we meet, we might be too."

With her mind made up, Lightning turns of her heels and heads down the path, leaving us behind for good, if we so choose. I shake my head, feeling my heart weight heavy. I could play it safe with Sazh, but then I'll find myself as a monster or dead at the hands of a random Sanctum gunman. Or, if I go with Lightning, I'm sure to suffer the consequences, but I might get the closure I need before I die. _And that's all I ever wanted._ Pressing my lips together, I take a deep breath and head down after her.

"What? Not you, too!" Sazh cries, alarmed. Hope scoffs.

"Snow deserves it!" _I almost forgot he has a bone to pick with the guy._ I glance up at the sky, feeling my heart go hard. _Don't we all? He got us here to begin with, and now he's on vacation with his crystalline girlfriend._

As my feet pound hard against the dirt, I hear Hope coming with me. I wish I could dread the companionship, but if we're going to do this, we need all the help we can get.

"Wait for me!" he cries, gasping for air. Lightning pauses her steps, glancing back to see him doubled over at my side. I straighten, putting on a brave face.

"I'm sick of running," I say sharply, determined to be allowed along.

"We're going with you," Hope pants out, looking up at her.

"I can't babysit you anymore."

"Babysit?" I snort, offended. _I've been pulling my load._

"I can fight," he argues. "I'm not afraid."

Suddenly, the rustle of footsteps interrupts us. A group of soldiers comes marching, guns raised. Lightning scowls.

"Great, a PSICOM hit squad."

One of the soldiers raises a device in his hand, pressing a button. The ground shakes as something behind us explodes. Giant chunks of debris slide into place, blocking any way back to Sazh and Vanille in a fiery blaze. _Too late to go back now._ I sigh, drawing my daggers. _Not that I wanted to._


	12. Keeper of Truth, Destroyer of Corruption

**SORRY I WENT QUIET FOR SO LONG, LIFE GOT A LITTLE WILD FOR A SEC. I'M BACK TO REGULAR UPLOADS NOW, THOUGH!**

* * *

Determined to prove to Lightning that I can handle myself, I rush at the first of the trio of soldiers, ducking under his gun when he fires off a round of shots and elbowing the weapon from his grasp. Ignoring the explosion of pain in my arm, I thank everything above me that I'm small and jam one of my daggers into the back of his knee, looking away from the spray of blood and wishing I could erase his scream from my memory. _Don't think about that._ He twists to ram his elbow into my spine, but I've already run behind him to wash a wall of sparks over his body. Jerking, he falls to the ground, still.

Hope grunts, swinging his arm as hard as he can to hurl spikes of ice at the only remaining soldier. Lightning's original target lies dead on the ground, bloody. She knocks the gun from the soldier's hands with the hilt of her sword before smashing the visor on the front of his helmet and shoving her blade through the gap. I wince, tucking my daggers away as I turn my eyes to the ground, feeling sick with guilt. _I have to do this. It's the only way we survive._ Gasping for air, Hope clutches his side, gritting his teeth. Lightning looks me up and down with an unreadable expression before turning to Hope.

"Not bad."

"Really? Thanks," he pants, straightening with a smile. I press my lips together, crossing my arms. Something has me on edge, the very same thing that tells me what exactly we're up against in battles. _There're more of them._

"There'll be more soldiers," I say, speaking up. "We should keep moving." Hope watches as Lightning walks toward the blocked path, watching the smoke rise into the air.

"Lightning? Are you worried about the others?" he asks, cocking his head to the side. His whole head of hair shifts with it, which I might have found funny if we weren't stuck _here._ "I'm sure they got away okay."

"So can you, if you leave now," she replies sharply. The words sting. _That wasn't enough?_ "With me, it'll be fight after fight. I don't know how it'll end. It's anybody's guess."

"I know that. But… I need to be stronger."

"Don't think I can handle it?" I huff. My words aren't provoking, though. It's a genuine question. When she frowns at me, I shrug, hugging my arms to my body. "There's… something I need to do, and if I can get to that point by coming with you, then that's how I'll do it." I offer a half-smile. "I've got my goal."

"Lightning?"

"Call me Light," she mutters. Hope glances at me uncertainly before pressing with further questions.

"What's the plan from here?"

"Through the Gapra Whitewood to Palumpolum. We'll find transport to Eden." My heart skips a beat and I resist the urge to look at Hope. _Palumpolum…_

"We live in Palumpolum," Hope says, excited when he shoots me a look. I sigh. _There goes that._ "I bet we can show you all the shortcuts."

"I know a way into the city from the Whitewood," I nod. "I used to sneak out all the time."

"No side trips," she reminds us sternly. I shrug.

"I don't have anything left to visit."

"Yeah, no need," Hope huffs. "I don't think l'Cie are welcome at home."

"Let's get going then," I push, wanting to move before we're closed in on.

Lightning nods, turning and running off down the only path we have left. My legs fall into the stride easily, relieved to be moving again. When the burn hits, I can't feel the ache. We power our way through a number of other soldiers. I may not be as good as Light, but I can keep up fairly well. Hope, on the other hand, is struggling. Soon, I have to say the same for myself. My body is beginning to fail me, exhausted from the lack of rest and the constant fighting. Frustrated, I try to push on, but the fatigue keeps slowing me, denying my usual disconnect. I wish healing magic to repair my lack of sleep.

After climbing mound upon mound of garbage and killing soldier after solider, I begin to fall back with Hope. I can feel the frustration emanating from Light every time she looks over her shoulder to see us another step behind, slowing her down. Gritting my teeth, I _push_ to the limits—until I'm stopped. Lightning ducks behind the wreckage of a ship and holds out an arm to stop us. Ahead are two soldiers guarding a dreadnought.

"Any sign of the l'Cie?" one asks. The other scans the dreadnought, arms crossed.

"Nothing. No sign it's been activated."

Lightning scoffs, stepping out into the open with her sword drawn. Hope and I suppress groans, stepping out with her. She takes most of the fight on her own as if she doesn't feel fatigue _ever. She's not human,_ I complain to myself, staggering to catch myself after the last man falls. I drag Hope to his feet when he raises a hand in silent question, watching as he wanders toward the dreadnought. _Don't trigger that thing._

"What was PSICOM doing here?" he asks, gingerly touching the rusted metal frame.

"Probably thought we'd try and use a Pulse machine to escape."

"Why don't we?" She shoots me a frown upon hearing my question.

"That's what they expect us to do."

"But…?" I shrug, glancing at Hope.

"Maybe we should try it," he presses, peeking under the machine. "What's this do?"

"Hey! You're gonna hurt yourself!" Light calls, irritated. "Don't touch that!"

"Wait, what if it works?" he asks, circling around back. Curious, I follow, dragging myself up on top of its… head?

"Leave it!" she snaps.

The dreadnought rubbles beneath me and I shout, surprised. Hope climbs on behind me, laughing. _How is this thing even alive?_ Quickly, we discover it's difficult to control, clinging tightly to smooth metal as it flails about, getting its giant shell in gear.

"I told you to leave it," Light scoffs.

"Stop! Stop already!" Hope shouts, banging on the top of the monstrosity.

"That's not gonna—" The dreadnought ceases its tossing and I shut my mouth tightly.

"I think I got it!" he cries. "Here, use that lever over there to move its leg." I obey, gasping and hanging on tightly when it stops its leg. "Light! I think we can work this!"

She sighs, stepping aside and waiting. Pulling the first lever to his right, Hope raises the dreadnought's clawed arm and smashes a wall of metal down, clearing a path for us. Lightning, defeated, grabs hold of a pipe on the underside of the machine and stands on its leg, motioning for us to continue. _Whatever works, right?_ I hang tight, scooting forward so that Hope can work the levers behind me. Somehow, he's figured it out. _Maybe he's not so useless after all._

Clanging our way across the bridge, we head through the beaten path of the trash valley. We burst through walls as if they're nothing but sandcastles, crumbling beneath the weight of our new vehicle. The arms swing to knock hundreds of pulsework soldiers out of our way. Suddenly, we screech to a halt; my heart shoots up to my throat. We're teetering over the edge of a drop. Hope grits his teeth, pulling back on the levers to stop the dreadnought, but it's weight cannot beat gravity, and we start to tumble. Quickly, I jump off the side, landing on my hands and knees as the smoking machine tumbles down to the ground.

"Hope!"

The dreadnought hits the ground with a dull thud, rumbling the earth. Hope rolls onto his back, coughing as smoke pours from the dented behemoth of a vessel. Sighing, I climb down the face of the rock wall, two steps ahead of Lightning. Electricity crackles over the surface of the rusted metal. I squint in its light, used to the darkness of night, and offer a hand down to Hope.

"Nice landing," Light scoffs. "Let's get moving."

"Just need a minute," Hope replies, taking my hand with a wince. "Still a bit winded."

"You're too soft," she replies sharply, heading in the other direction.

"Wait up!" he cries, panting. I sigh, following.

"It was a good idea," I mutter, catching his eye. He frowns.

"Maybe it was a waste of time. Snow's getting away."

 _Snow. Is that what all this is about?_ I should've guessed he wanted to kill the guy instead of confronting him about his mother, but I suppose it never really clicked until now. This guy, this kid that's my age, who can hardly walk a mile, much less fight, wants to take down a giant who could pummel a behemoth into oblivion with his _pinky._ The only advantage he has is his smarts, and even that won't get him very far. Not in this world.

For the first short stretch, I feel rejuvenated from our short ride, but the instant we start to fight off soldiers again, my legs begin to feel like jelly. _It's been so long since I slept._ I'm ashamed to admit that Hope and I fall even farther behind than before. Still, we push on, gasping for air and ignoring the pain in favor of staying alive—finding meaning in the pursuit of our separate goals.

Gritting my teeth, I set a steady pace and run after Lightning, slowing to match her fast walk. Hope catches up, clutching his side. I can almost see the irritation radiating from the soldier. Once we reach a long, rusted bridge, I watch the pouring of the waterfall to my right, jumping when I hear Hope tumble to the ground, tripping over the lip of the bridge. Lightning looks over her shoulder sharply.

"This isn't working," she says, her voice cold. Her eyes make me want to curl into myself until she can't see me anymore. "I mean, you're a liability. _Both_ of you." She huffs, continuing down the path. "You'll just slow me down."

"What?!" Hope stands, coming closer. Genuine fear crosses his face as he realizes that she's trying to dump us alone, here, in the middle of nowhere.

"I'm sorry, but I can't protect you when—" She stops suddenly, clutching her chest. I hardly notice, pained by the burden of being left behind for the umpteenth time in my life.

"You can't just _leave_ us here!"

"You have to take us with you!" Hope adds, hands curling into fists at his sides.

"Enough!" She shouts, staggering. "The whole world is against us!" I only realize something's wrong when she falls to her knees with a grunt. "I can barely keep myself alive, let alone some helpless _kids_!"

"Helpless?" I demand, but I can't help but feel anxious, watching her wrestle with something I can't see.

"I don't have time to baby you!"She screams. Hope shakes his head, eyes wide. "You wanna get tough? Do it on your own!"

The symbols burst out around her so quickly that I nearly fall, stumbling away from the burst of rosy pink light. Lightning cries out, curled over. The enormous brand nearly takes up the entire bridge, circling around her in the shape of a flower. I step away from a petal, bumping into Hope. Light runs out of the circle just as a burst of rose petals pushes us back. I gasp, terrified as an enormous, metallic warrior stands over us, sword drawn and beady, glowing eyes set on us.

"This _cannot_ be happening," Lightning huffs, drawing her sword. The man jumps toward us and we scream, running. Hope tumbles to the ground, staring at the jagged blade in horror.

"Look out!" Light cries.

Before I can react to the giant sword coming down over Hope's head, Light's there, blocking the creature's blade with her own. The force of the parry nearly crushes her. Quickly, I haul Hope to his feet, something I seem to be doing a lot lately. He snaps his boomerang into place hesitantly, hands trembling. The weight of my daggers is reassuring, but the uncertainty in Light's eyes is _terrifying._ For once, we have no plan. There's no _way_ to plan for this. _It's an Eidolon._ The only way to find them is to give up hope. If Light's given up… I shake the thought away.

"Let's do this," the solider mutters, staring up at the giant with cold eyes. _Odin._

Hope steps back, quickly casting a magical shield over all of us. Lightning rushes forward to attack Odin, hacking and slashing as much as she can as she dives under swing after swing. The edge of his jagged blade catches her arm and sends her flying. She clutches the wound, watching blood ooze between her fingers. Quickly, I send a flurry of healing magic her way. The cut seals up almost instantly, letting her go right back in.

But she's smacked around as if she's weightless, over and over and over again. Sweat pours down my face as I hurl splashes of water at the Eidolon, my heart racing. Thunderbolts strike the ground around us. Hope's the first to get hit, falling to his knees with a gritted cry of pain.

"Hope!" Lightning shouts, falling back. As she runs back to help him, I stand alone before the warrior, craning my head back to see all the way up to his face. His eyes are empty, emotionless. This is his purpose.

"Please don't," I whisper, watching him raise his sword and shield. Frozen in terror, I watch sparks ripple down the length of his blade, just barely managing to duck in time to avoid getting my head lopped off.

Scrambling to my left, I'm blocked by another soaring swing, skidding to a stop so quickly that I fall and just barely crawl away in time. _Why me?!_ I choke on my breaths as this game of cat and mouse continues for what feels like an eternity. I'm not strong enough to fight back and I'm not fast enough to escape. _Please…_ Just as I'm about to collapse from pure exhaustion, dragging myself away from a strike of lightning, Light swings her sword up to meet Odin's, leaping off the ground as if she's weightless.

"Leave her _alone!"_ She slashes at his armor relentlessly, hardly making a dent.

Hope pushes back with fireball after fireball. Odin makes a sound, almost a grunt of sorts, and steps back, holding his sword out in front of him before slamming it down into the earth before me. Stunned on the ground, I watch as the Eidolon's limbs twist and pop, clicking into place like a puzzle. He lifts into the air in a shower of sparks, morphing into the shape of a horse. A whirlwind of rose petals swirls around him as his hooves hit the ground. Gritting her teeth, Light grabs the sword from the ground, slinging a leg over Odin's back and parting the sword into two separate blades, victorious.

When she dismounts, the horse snorts, galloping straight into the sky and away into the night. I stare up at the moon, bewildered. _This whole thing's like one long fever dream._ Light presses her hand to the glowing symbol on her chest that remains, falling back to the ground.

"Lightning!" Hope calls, running for her.

Wiping the sweat off my forehead with the back of my arm, I stand on my trembling legs and walk toward her, cheeks flushed with embarrassment. _I lost my grip. I'm sorry._

"Your brand looks different," he points out. "Was that an Eidolon? Like l'Cie can summon?" Light scoffs.

"Magic and mumbo-jumbo. I must've hit my head on that Purge train." She stands, lifting her sword with her and watching me shuffle my way closer to them.

"Um…" Hope stares hard at the ground, playing with his fingers. "Am I really in your way?" _It's like I don't even exist…_ Sighing, she walks past him, shoving her sword into its sheathe. Panicked, he continues. "I'll do better! I'll try harder, I'll—"

"Hope." She turns back. "We'll toughen you up. And I'm sorry about before."

With that, she continues on her way as if nothing ever happened. Taking a deep breath, I force myself to calm down and follow. My head's started to pound with the rhythm of our feet hitting the ground and my eyes are _burning. What time is it, anyway?_ I'm snapped from my thoughts when we're ambushed by a troop of PSICOM soldiers. Lightning draws her sword.

"Got my back?" she demands. Hope nods.

"Yeah!"

Careful not to get in the way, I stand back, bombarding the soldiers with balls of fire. Beside me, Hope throws up his newfound spell. I watch a shimmering violet shield flicker before my eyes before it fades, reminding me that I'm safe from the bullets of the enemy. Using this to her advantage, Lightning ignores their shooting and cuts them down, relentless. We stand in the wreckage of the fight, catching our breath. Slowly, I tuck my daggers away, watching Hope double over, wheezing. _Does he have asthma or something?_

"We'll stop here," Light says, surprising us both.

"Sorry," Hope puffs, falling to his knees with exhaustion.

"Don't sweat it." She stares off into the distance. "I'll look around. You two rest up."

As she goes, I settle against the boulder Hope's leaning against, sinking to the ground. I tug at the laces on my boots, relieved to feel the pain in my legs giving way finally. Hope dozes off the instant he shuts his eyes, leaving me alone in the dark. Sighing, I stare up at the sky. I'm tired enough to hibernate, but the anxiety coating our future keeps me wide awake. My stomach flutters at the mere thought of my brother's name. _Please let me see you one last time._ The sound of Light's approaching steps causes my heart to do panicked backflips, but I force myself to calm down, to recognize that we're safe for now. Coming back around the corner, she glances from Hope to me before sitting across from us by a different rock.

"He was out like a light," I mutter, scared to speak. _I let her down._

"I'm not surprised," she replies, transforming her sword into a gun. She eyes the barrel before looking up at me. "How old are you?"

"Fourteen. Fifteen next month." I pause, picking the dirt off the tread of my boots. "But I probably won't make it that far."

"Don't think like that." Light rests her weapon across her knees, keeping a sharp eye out. "Where'd you learn to fight? Kid like you shouldn't be carrying weapons around."

"Oh." I smile sheepishly. "My brother… he joined the GC when I was only four. I wanted to be just like him, so he started teaching me what he learned, training me." My heart warms at the fond memories and stings at the harsh ones that immediately replace them. "I've been training to join the GC since I was ten. I was gonna go when I turned sixteen but... Guess the training's not useless, but it's not going where I wanted it to."

"Doesn't matter what you wanted before." She shakes her head. I shrug.

"I guess not." _Is that Snow's problem? He can't focus on the future anymore?_ "I, um, I'm sorry about earlier. With Odin. I kinda slipped up."

"Don't apologize," she says sharply. "You're doing your best. We'll get you levelheaded before the end."

"Okay," I nod, instantly feeling the weight of my humiliation lift off my shoulders. The exhaustion settles in soon after. Yawning, I slide onto my stomach, resting my head on my arms. _I have to sleep while I can._

"Mom?" Hope mumbles. Light scoffs and I roll my eyes.

"Not by a long shot."


	13. The Gapra Whitewood

Long leaves traced with blue veins of energy glow brightly all around us, filling the research facility from top to bottom with artificial life and illuminating the nursery of newfound PSICOM beasts. The walls are iron, bolted together to prevent escape, not entry. Lit by the same mysterious glow as the plant life, the floor leads a guided path through the facility, disappearing in all sorts of winding directions. Lightning charges in first, gun raised as she runs to the nearest shadow. Silently, she motions for us to follow her, seeing nothing around. I hold my breath, falling into a low crouch by her side. Hope ducks his head, staring hard at our strange surroundings. Everything is so familiar, and yet, so alien at the same time.

"Can't believe we made it," he says, eyes alight with life I haven't seen before. The ground rumbles as the gate closes behind us, sealing our fate.

"That'll slow pursuit," Light comments.

"But aren't there troops on this side?"

"There're troops everywhere," I point out. "It's just a matter of how many we can handle."

"Still, we can't relax just yet."

"Right," Light nods. "We press on. I'll take point. You watch our backs."

"Actually…" Hope cuts in. I frown. _This is going to be stressful._ "Why don't you let me take point?" He laughs uncomfortably upon seeing our faces.

"Can you handle it?" Light asks. Hope laughs again, running ahead of her and looking back.

"It's not a question of can or can't." I roll my eyes.

"Now you're learning." He turns to lead the way and she barks out her instructions. "Keep your eyes front. I'll watch the rear and Amarhi will keep an eye on the rest." He nods.

"Got it."

"And be careful," I add, desperate to stay alive. Light scoffs, her own way of laughing I guess, and I draw my daggers, ready. Under my breath, I speak to her as Hope takes off. "I want us all to survive this in one piece." She nods curtly.

"Anything happens up front, you rush in to help him."

"Gotcha."

Hope tentatively leads the way down the path, watching the gleaming wood pass with wonder. Light keeps her eyes sharp, finger ready to pull the trigger should someone come up behind us. Between the two, I make sure to keep my eyes on it all, checking for anything and everything the others might miss. The pace is so slow that I nearly trip over Hope several times, impatient to get through Palumpolum and reach Eden. Realizing the problem, Light speaks up.

"Be wary, but don't be afraid."

"O-Okay."

"What should we be looking for in here?" I ask, glancing up to see the sky. "I was always told to stay away, but are we just searching for soldiers?"

"No," Light replies. "This is where they develop the monsters that PSICOM uses as crowd control."

My mind flashes back to the behemoth that inadvertently caused the death of Hope's mother. In the end, it was Snow that made the final call. Still, PSICOM is nowhere near blameless for this. They killed many more than her. _They killed my family._ Gritting my teeth, I bring myself back into focus upon seeing Hope pull his boomerang free, seeing a collection of brilliantly colored slugs up ahead. _Not threatening in the slightest._

The creatures hiss, leaping into the air and diving at Hope before anyone can get to him. Ducking his head, he raises his arms as the slimy creatures slam him, knocking him back toward us. I slice through one's soft flesh, flinching when hot, acidic goo pours from the wound. Grimacing, I fling the stuff off my arm and watch my skin blister from the burns. _Frag leech._ Lightning takes my spot, cutting a leech clean in two with her blade. _At least they're easy._ Hope sends a wall of flame toward the pack of slugs and they shriek as their skin crackles, drying out. I cut down two stragglers before stepping back, ready for another monster. There are none. Lightning sheathes her sword, nodding at us.

"Good work."

As frustrating as it is to be continuously brought down to Hope's level just because we're the same age, I'll take what I can get. I nod back, smiling.

"Thanks."

"See those lights?" Lightning jerks her head toward the glowing beams in our path. They only go in one direction, leading toward the other side of the facility and completely ignoring all other paths. "We can use them as a guide to keeps us moving in the right direction."

The next time we fight, it's with a pair of leeches and a thexteron. I take out the leeches with fire as Hope did before, burning them to ash with a spell that's much more potent than his. _It's the practice. All the training._ Ignoring the ache in my chest, I turn to watch Lightning cut the thexteron to bits as Hope shocks it with a few lightning spells. It falls with a groan. _Getting so much better._ Despite our newfound and effective dynamic in battle, we keep our heads low and avoid getting into too much trouble, running past thexterons and leeches in the shadows. Once we're in the clear, Hope slows to a stop, turning to face Light.

"Have you ever been here before? On duty, I mean."

"No, I haven't. This area's covered by the Woodlands Observation Battalion."

"Another branch of PSICOM," I mutter, crossing my arms. "Why do they get to have their noses in the dangerous business without the GC?"

"PSICOM works with the higher-ups," Light replies, resting a hand on her hip. "You scared?"

"Not really," Hope reassures her, shaking his head. "I'm ready to fight if I have to."

"Me too," I nod. "This isn't like anything I've ever seen before, but it's not like I'm alone." Lightning nods, reaching into a pouch at her side. She pulls a folded knife free, handing it to Hope.

"To keep you safe," she says. He takes it, flipping the jagged blade up. "I'll want it back," she reminds him sternly, turning back to the path we have yet to take: up. Hope watches her go a few steps before glancing at me.

"What'll I use it for?"

"I don't know," I shrug, watching the blue lights dance along the edge of the blade. "For Snow? It'll be a hell of a lot easier than killing him with that boomerang."

"Yeah…" Hope looks up sharply. "Lightning!" When she pauses, he puts the blade away, tucking the knife into his back pocket. "I'm glad I followed you. By myself, I would've had no chance." He glances over at me. "Not that I can speak for you."

"Determination isn't everything," I admit with a sigh.

"No, it's not."

Light boards the lift, waiting for us to follow. Exchanging a look, Hope and I step on too. He presses the glowing button at the edge of the lift and we begin to rise to the next level of winding roads. When Hope looks back to see if we're following, Lightning raises an eyebrow.

"Trust us to cover your back and keep your eyes forward."

"Okay," Hope nods, hesitant. I laugh.

"Don't worry, I don't bite."

"You might," he huffs. "You seem like the type of person."

"Gee, thanks."

"Pay attention," Light cuts in, serious and strict as always. There's just enough give in her voice to remind us that she's here to help.

The path is long and winding; Hope leads us quickly down the road the lights lead us down. Again, we keep as low as possible, fighting only when we have to. Above our heads, I hear a shriek, listening to the rustling of the leaves as vespids dive about, their dusty feathers falling along our path.

"Keep calm," Lightning instructs. "There's no need to rush."

"Yeah, but I still want to get out of here _quickly_ ," I mutter.

"Focus on that, and you'll get sloppy." Lightning watches a group of leeches drift along a separate path. "Won't do us any good to lose someone along the way."

"Lose someone?" Hope repeats, glancing over his shoulder.

"Eyes forward."

"How do you stay so patient?" I ask, shaking my head. "If I were you, I'd be long gone by now." Light doesn't answer, frowning.

"Hope, don't stray too far."

"I won't," the boy huffs, reaching out to touch a leaf. "If we weren't here for this, I'd say it's pretty beautiful here." He comes to a stop, admiring the foliage.

"I used to hide in the woods on the outskirts of this place," I say, crossing my arms. He looks up sharply.

"Hide? From what? If anything, it's more dangerous out here!"

"There are worse things than monsters," I counter. "It was… tense at home, so I would walk all the way out to the forest and sleep in the trees until my parents sent the Guardian Corps to find me."

"Waste of troops," Light mutters. "Where'd they get that sort of influence?"

"Family friends," I shrug. "It was always the same squad. Have you ever met Rygdea?"

"Yeah."

"He's a close friend of ours. Brought me back every time whether I wanted to go or not."

"Why were they so paranoid?" Hope scoffs. "Your parents, I mean. If you always came back, why worry?"

"I don't think they knew I could handle myself."

"You're their kid," Lightning argues, resting her hands on her hips as she eyes me. Fearful that she can see through the lies, I keep my eyes on the Whitewood. "Who wouldn't worry?"

"It wasn't that they cared about my safety," I mutter. "They couldn't handle another embarrassing line of pitying people filing into our homes with casseroles and money we didn't need."

"What?"

"Wait…" Hope cuts in, looking around quickly.

"What is it?" Light asks.

"We have to hide!" He grabs my arm and jerks me behind an overhanging branch. "Come on!"

Mere moments after we duck behind the leaves, a troop of PSICOM soldiers zips past on their rumbling bikes, scanning the Whitewood from the air. _Just another guard patrol?_ They don't even seem to look around all that much before racing to another section of the facility. Hope steps out into the light, watching them go.

"They don't even seem like they're looking for us. I mean, we're l'Cie, and we're on the loose!"

"PSICOM's keeping it all under wraps." Light scoffs. "They don't want their failure publicized. Better to lose us than lose their pride."

"So the other soldiers don't know about us, right?"

"Right. They don't know _anything_ about any fugitives."

"Almost like we don't even exist," I add, smiling wryly. _Maybe our luck's turned for the better._

We enter the next elevator, which brings us down where we were before. I frown. _Isn't the exit higher?_ Still, I force myself to trust Lightning's sense of direction and follow Hope into the light, reminding myself of why I'm here. The path is long and winding, and there are at least a hundred more leeches to kill, but we stay strong. The rumble of a stomping behemoth stops us in our tracks.

"We have to sneak past," Light says under her breath. Hope nods, swallowing his fear.

There are no leaves to shield us as we creep along the walkway slowly, watching the beast claw at a pack of thexterons. Its enormous paws bat the creatures out of the way as if they weigh absolutely nothing. My heart pounds and I hold my breath, sticking close. As it turns around to face where we once stood, Lightning pushes us to run. I do so immediately, but I stumble to a stop when Hope trips with a cry. The behemoth turns, snarling upon seeing its newest prey. With its tail, it blocks Light's path to us. Hope scrambles away, unable to get to his feet.

To be honest, I was terrified, running toward the behemoth with my daggers and my magic to protect me. But once my arm stretched out and I felt the fear convert into energy, I knew we'd be safe. The sheer amount of ice that _blasts_ from my hand and into the face of the behemoth is horrifying; I wonder where it all came from. Hope sits still on the ground, staring in shock, and Lighting slides under the frozen monster's legs, coming to join us. _Was that all me?_

"What the—" I start, glancing down at my hand. Lighting grabs my shoulder, turning me away.

"It'll break free in a moment. We have to move."

Just as we start to walk away, I hear the ice cracking and a low growl emitting from behind. That's all it takes to kick us into gear, sprinting down the walkway and searching for any safe place to hide. Hope's gasping goes from irritating to concerning as he wheezes beside me, clutching his side. Daring to hope, I grab his arm, feeling a healing spell warm the space between us. He catches his breath, shooting me a confused look as he jerks his arm away and keeps running, driven by the rumble of the monster behind us. _A thanks would be nice…_

"Right!" Lightning calls, turning the corner sharply.

Yet again, I have to grab Hope and pull him in the right direction, knowing he won't be able to turn fast enough. The behemoth, too large to turn, digs its claws into the steel pathway and slows, swiveling around. Its weight is far too much to stop at that speed, though, and with a bone-chilling roar, it tumbles over the edge of the pathway and into whatever mess is below us.

Gasping for air, we come to a stop. I wipe the sweat off my face and tie my hair up to keep it out of my face. Hope clutches his knees, choking on air. Keeping an eye out for any enemies, Lightning presses her lips together before speaking.

"Where'd that come from?"

"The behemoth?" I'm trying to avoid all the questioning, but it's getting hard by now. I'm _bad_ at keeping secrets.

"The magic." She looks at me sharply. "It's gotten stronger."

"No, I just panicked," I defend. "And when I panic, I—" I shut my mouth, looking down at the scuffed toes of my boots. _Just shut up!_

"You get stronger?" Hope asks. I nod, glancing up at him.

"Your brother…" Light's eyes go softer and she cocks her head to the side. "He's Cid Raines, isn't he?" My heart drops to my stomach and I search for words, scared. _What if she thinks I'm trying to find him so that he can kill us?_

"I—How did you…?"

"I didn't make the connection when you asked about him," she says, watching a trail of colorful slugs slide past. "But then you mentioned that your brother taught you to fight because he was in the Guardian Corps."

"And your name…" Hope adds with a shrug. When I scowl at him, he backs down. "I-I mean, _I_ didn't figure it out, but—"

"It's alright," Lightning reassures me. "Just don't get too lost in the hope that we'll be seeing him. This is PSICOM's business, and even if we run into Cid, you have to remember he's the enemy now."

"My brother would never—"

"Sometimes duty gets in the way of family," she cuts in, turning sharply and heading down the path. "Let's keep moving."

"What'll you do if we run into him?" Hope asks, keeping his voice low. I sigh, shaking my head.

"I haven't thought about it until now. Probably say my goodbyes."

"That's it?"

"Where do you think we're going, Hope?" I snap. "This is a death sentence, but it's the only way to do this." I shake my head, avoiding his eyes. "We're making a difference."

"I know that." He hurries to keep up, trying to catch my eye. "But shouldn't you be a little more hopeful? What if this is our Focus?"

"Then why did Serah tell us to protect Cocoon?" I demand. "This is all just one, big mess and there's no way to know for sure."

"Serah can't know our Focus."

"Why's that?"

"Because she's Sanctum."

"Or is it because you don't want to admit that would mean Snow was right?" I retort, rolling my eyes. Hope's hands curl into fists.

"Snow isn't right! He can't be, not after—"

"The fal'Cie doesn't give a _shit_ about what happened to your mom, Hope!" I snap. Lightning stops walking ahead of us. "That's the whole point! There's still the chance that Snow's right about all this, but we're choosing not to _care_. The fal'Cie don't get to call the shots anymore." Hope's face contorts through a hundred emotions at once, hurt. "We're not here for your mom."

"That's what _I'm_ here for!" he shouts. "And whatever happens afterward is fine!"

"Quiet!" Lightning snaps. "Both of you! Quit fighting and keep your eyes on the goal. If you can't, you're as good as dead."

I keep my mouth shut after that, angry, but not sure who I'm angry at. Hope's in denial, sure, but that shouldn't get on my nerves so much. Light's done nothing but keep us looking forward. Am I mad at _myself?_ I shake my head, sighing. I don't know what to do anymore. Light's right. Even if I do see Cid, he's the enemy now. If I see him once more, that's the last time. _It's better than never saying goodbye at all._ Turning my daggers over and over in my hands, I begin to wonder… _But is it really?_


	14. Break Free

_~4 years before~_

 _I roll to my feet, my daggers gripped tightly in my hands as I watch Cid rush past with a sword gripped in his hand. Sharply, he turns to face me, calm and collected as I gasp for air. Brows pulled together tightly, he runs at me again. I parry a strike with my daggers, making a few slashes in the outer edge of his padded shirt._

 _"Good," he says when he turns to face me again. "Make attacks of your own; don't just wait for the enemy."_

 _"I'll try," I nod._

 _Taking a deep breath, I sprint at him, sliding across the ground to avoid the slow swing of his sword. Obviously, he's going easy on me. If he was really trying, he could kill me with his pinky. This move, however, caught him by surprise. He looks pleased when he raises his blade to parry a strike I try to make with my knives, using only his arm to fight back. The rest of him is as still, strong, and solemn as a statue. Frustrated, I step back, crossing my arms._

 _"I'll never beat you."_

 _"That's not the point," Cid shakes his head. "You're learning defensive maneuvers and counterattacks well through this method. You're still young, Marhi. It'll be a very long time before you'll be able to fight me. It takes years to develop these skills to the point of second nature."_

 _"Years?" I repeat in disbelief, throwing back my head and groaning loudly. "I'll never be strong enough!"_

 _"The years go by faster the more that come by, trust me," he laughs, beckoning with his sword. "Come on; just a little while longer. Until Mom comes home, at least."_

 _"Just face me with, like, half of your strength?" I beg, kicking at the ground._

 _"No," he scoffs, shaking his head. "Cassie'll kill me."_

 _"C'mon!"_

 _"You really want me to?"_

 _"Yeah! Don't be cocky, I can do it!"_

 _"Alright, get ready." He steps back and I plant my feet, staring at him hard with determination fueling my every movement. His blue eyes sparkling, Cid shakes his head. "Remember, you asked for this. Don't go crying to Mom."_

 _"Wha…?"_

 _I'm flat on my back before I even see my brother move, gasping for air. I roll over quickly to avoid the flash of a sword that strikes the ground beside my head. I scramble to my feet, gripping my daggers with shaky hands. Cid rushes at me with speed I never knew he had; I dive back to the ground to evade an attack. Slightly panicked and desperate not to lose, I push myself back up and run at him, ducking under his blade and reaching out to cut at his shirt. His elbow strikes my spine and flattens me to the floor yet again. I roll onto my back, gasping for air. Relentless, he raises his sword and rushes at me. On instinct, I stretch out my palms, cringing and turning my face away._

 _The sound of metal hitting concrete rings in my ears. At the very same moment, a scalding heat burns the smooth skin of my hands, but only for a moment. All my hairs stand straight on end; my fingers tremble uncontrollably as I sit up, looking up at Cid. For the first time in my life, he looks lost for words, his eyes wide and his breaths ragged. His face is white as a ghost and fear strikes me harder than his blade ever could._

 _"Wh-what happened?" I stammer, pleading him for an answer._

 _"I don't…" Cid falls to his knees at my side, gripping my wrists and whipping his head around. My heart skips a beat; he's checking to see if anyone else saw. "What did you do?"_

 _"I don't know," I shake my head, panicked when he tightens his hold, glaring into my face. His eyes are overflowing with terror. "Cid?"_

 _"Amarhi, what did you do?"_

 _"I don't know!" I practically scream into his face, twisting my hands to try to escape. "Let me go!"_

 _"This is bad," he mutters under his breath, releasing me and running a hand through his hair. "Are there any tattoos on you?"_

 _"What?! Cid, I'm ten!"_

 _"Listen to me," he says firmly, grabbing hold of my shoulders and sternly looking me in the eye. "Are there are sorts of brands on your body? When was the last time you washed?"_

 _"This morning?" I frown, craning my neck to pull my face away from his. "Stop, you're scaring me."_

 _"You used magic!" he hisses, shaking me a few times. "Don't you get it? That only happens to l'Cie!"_

 _"I used...?" I shake my head, shuddering. "No, that's impossible." He doesn't say anything. "Cid, stop messing around!"_

 _"Do I look like I'm messing around?" he snaps, glaring at me. "Do you understand how bad this is?"_

 _"I'm not a l'Cie," I insist. "And even if I was, it wouldn't be that bad, right? What would a fal'Cie do with a little girl?"_

 _"They don't care," he grits out, checking my arms for any signs of a brand. "You don't think it would be terrible to be the puppet to a god who cares not whether or not you or the people live so long as your Focus is completed?" Cid grabs the back of my head, pressing his forehead to mine and closing his eyes. "Afterward, you'd be turned cie'th or crystal; either way, you'd never be Amarhi again." I take a deep breath, combing a knot out of his hair with my fingers. "Please, Marhi, go inside and check every inch of your skin. Let Cassie help. I don't know to explain magic without a l'Cie, and there's no way you got ahold of a mandrive."_

 _"…Okay."_

 _"Let me know."_

 _"I will." I pull him into a tight hug, burying my face into the side of his neck. "I promise."_

 _He stands, lifting me with him, and we hurry inside. Cid tosses his sword onto the island counter in our kitchen. Cassie jumps, startled, and turns away from her cookbook, wiping her hands on the hem of her shirt. She parts her lips to speak, only to pause upon seeing our pale faces._

 _"What happened?" she demands, hurrying over to us. "Did you hurt her? I swear to the gods, Cid, if you—"_

 _"Are Mom and Dad home?" he cuts her off, letting me slide to the floor._

 _"What do you think?" she bites back, grabbing my shoulders and turning me to face her. "What happened?"_

 _"I don't know what to do," Cid huffs, running his hands through his hair and pacing toward the living room. Cassie glares over at him._

 _"Cid, for the love of the fal'Cie, what the hell happened out there?"_

 _"She used magic." He hisses the word like it's a sacred curse never meant to be spoken by mankind. "Some sort of lightning, I don't know."_

 _"What?" Cassie shakes her head. "But that's impossible."_

 _"No, it's not." Cid turns to face us again. "Unless she's a l'Cie."_

 _"But I didn't go by the fal'Cie!" I protest. "The last time I was close to one was during a field trip years ago!"_

 _"You and the other kids didn't go play over there?" she pushes, the blood draining from her face as well._

 _"No!" I stomp my foot on the floor, frustrated. "What other kids, Cassie?! Why don't you believe me?!"_

 _"How else could we explain this?" she counters, looking over at Cid. "Is there anything she could've stolen?"_

 _"I didn't steal —"_

 _"A mandrive, but I don't know how she would've gotten one. That's more PSICOM territory; I leave mine at the base."_

 _"Marhi—"_

 _"Why would I keep a lie up this long?!" I shout, shoving Cassie's hands away. "Don't you see that I'm scared too?!" Cassie purses her lips together and she and Cid exchange looks before she shakes her head and grabs my hand._

 _"C'mon; I'm going to check you for a brand."_

 _"Finally," I huff, but it's half-hearted. What if there really is a brand?_

 _Cassie pulls me to our bedroom and looks over every inch of my skin that she possibly can, chewing her lip and whispering an assortment of unintelligible things under her breath. Finally, she sits on the edge of her mattress and shakes her head. I raise an eyebrow, waiting. She shrugs._

 _"There's nothing there."_

 _"I didn't steal anything, Cassie."_

 _"… I know you didn't."_

 _"Then how do you think I did that?"_

 _"Well," she takes a deep breath, standing and walking toward the door. "Either Cid saw something or there's something about you that we can't explain just yet." She starts to leave._

 _"What if… my parents were l'Cie?" I ask, frowning. She shakes her head._

 _"The traits wouldn't pass down to you. Being a l'Cie isn't anything genetic; the fal'Cie has to come after you specifically if he wants you, too."_

 _"Okay," I sigh, crossing my arms._

 _"Amarhi?"_

 _"What?"_

 _"Do yourself a favor and don't tell anyone, not even Mom and Dad," she pleads, offering a small smile. "Nothing good will come from it. Let me and Cid pull the weight."_

 _"But what about me?"_

 _"You just worry about keeping it a secret, yeah? We'll figure something out."_

 _"Okay," I nod, rubbing the back of my neck._

 _"Okay," she repeats, nodding back and slipping out of the room to speak with our brother._

 _I sit on my bed, swinging my legs and staring at the floor. I can hear two loud voices shouting back and forth somewhere in the house. There's a loud thud and the ringing of the doorbell. More shouting. I sigh, falling onto my back and staring at the swirling pattern on my ceiling. The front door slams. A minute of silence passes. Slowly, my door creaks open. Cid walks in, heaving a sigh and leaning against the doorframe. There's a red welt on his forehead and a scratch on his cheek. I sit up._

 _"You okay?"_

 _"Fine," he shrugs. "You know how she gets."_

 _"She thinks she's my mother," I scoff, rolling my eyes._

 _"She has every right to be worried," he counters, crossing his arms._

 _"Where is she?"_

 _"Left with a friend."_

 _"Jay?"_

 _"Yeah."_

 _"Hm." I look to my window, watching the busy streets of Palumpolum flash with lights and bright colors. "What are we going to do?"_

 _"Exactly what she said. You keep it a secret and we'll try and figure out what's gone wrong."_

 _"What if it's not a bad thing?" I ask, facing him. "What if I become super useful for the Guardian Corps?"_

 _"And no one will be suspicious? What, do you plan to strip down for every person who doesn't believe you?" Cid shakes his head. "It'll be a hell of a lot harder to convince the Guardian Corps than to convince me and Cassie."_

 _"So I stay in hiding?"_

 _"You don't have to hide, you just have to figure out what it is you can do and control it."_

 _"But how? It only happened once._ "

 _"But it doesn't have to stop there."_

 _"What?"_

 _"Get up," Cid jerks his head toward the hallway. "We're going to master those sparks of yours."_

"This is the bulkhead fal'Cie. We should be careful."

We slow to a stop before a glowing set of golden gates. In the center is a pair of twisting tendrils of light that match the bright blue of the foliage around us. Hope falls to the ground, wheezing and clutching his sides. _More cramps, I bet._ Taking a deep breath, he hugs a knee to his chest and glances up at Light.

"I wonder how the others are doing."

"Sazh and Vanille? Who knows?"

"I'm sure they're fine," I assure him. "They can hold their own."

"Yeah, but for how long?" Lightning counters. "They can't run forever. Even if they got away, they'll get caught eventually. Then they'll have to choose: resist or surrender."

"They're just delaying the inevitable…" I sigh, shaking my head. It's hard to understand why people make the decisions they do.

"Surrender…" Hope repeats, frowning. The frown morphs into a scowl and he directs his angry eyes at me. "Do you think _he's_ still alive?"

"You mean Snow?" Light asks, resting her hands on her hips. "He's too stubborn to die. And that's his best quality. He's arrogant and chummy from the get-go. He thinks he's everybody's pal. Never likes him much."

"He doesn't take responsibility," I huff, sitting beside Hope to ease the ache of my body. Light scoffs.

"He leads around a bunch of kids—gang called NORA."

"Where'd they get the name NORA?" Hope asks, staring hard at his lap.

"It's a stupid acronym. Their little _code._ Stand for 'No Obligations, Rules, or Authority.' Must be nice."

"It's irresponsible," he says, standing and briskly passing by the both of us into the gateway. I sigh, getting to my feet and following.

As we head toward the dark ground floor on the next elevator, Lightning makes sure we know what we're up against.

"There are a lot of feral creatures here, too. They're a little different from the military breeds."

"I imagine real animals are a lot different than the machine types," I huff, wandering past a large flower that glows pink in the darkness.

"They've been making a shift toward selective breeding for a while. My guess is whatever mechs you ran into before were the bottom of the barrel." She pauses, resting a hand on her hip and jerking her head toward the large, canine beasts that pace the shadows. "This is an army facility for turning wildlife into weapons."

"Civilians aren't allowed in here, are they?" Hope asks.

"No way," I scoff. "Even the outskirts are heavily guarded. I used to play in the woods around this place."

"We'll have to be sure and tell them if we see any," Light mutters. "See those fences? Those sense the presence of high-risk creatures. If we kill 'em all, we'll walk through safe."

"Kill all of those?" Hope stares at the pack of monsters in disbelief. "How can we do that?"

"Find their weakness," I shrug, staring hard at the beasts as they pounce back and forth at each other, swiping with their dangerous claws. I will the voice to come back, to tell me what we're up against, but nothing comes. _How does that even work?_

"Exactly."

Lightning draws her sword and runs toward the lone wolf in the corner, slashing the blade across the creature's gray fur. _Silver lobo._ I roll my eyes, rushing at it with my daggers. _Gee, thanks._ Large, tight muscles ripple beneath the lobo's skin as it lunches away from me. I hardly have a second to back off before it swipes with its claws. A burst of fire heats the air and then it turns to Hope, snarling. Before it can do much, I jam a blade into its side and tear. Lightning runs her sword up the underside of its belly, launching it into the air as if it's weightless and watching it land with a yelp. A final flame ends its fragile life.

"Are these Pulse monsters?" Hope asks between breaths. Lightning nods.

"Yeah, I think so. Where else would they get them?"

"The fal'Cie?"

Before anyone can reply, a pair of silver lobos runs toward us, snapping at each other with their enormous, toothy jaws. Lightning slices across one's face, slinging blood across the dark floor. I burn the other one with Hope, trying to prevent them from ganging up on Light. They snap at her, drooling and snarling. Unfazed, the soldier kicks one of the lobos away before stabbing into its side, swinging her sword backward to cut the second down. To her, this is a cakewalk. I stagger back, catching my balance and taking a deep breath to ease the cramp in my side. _How am I gonna make it all the way?_

"Three more!" Light calls, running in the other direction.

Rolling my eyes at Hope, I stumble after her, daggers at the ready. I can't figure out if we should each take one or if we should focus on one at a time. It comes to the point that it doesn't matter anymore all too soon, though. Hope screams and I turn to watch him beat at a lobo's head with his boomerang, wailing as it digs its fangs deeper into his leg. I stretch out my arm to help him, panicked, only to feel to heavy paws slam into my back and knock me to the ground.

There's half a second for me to jam my dagger into the roof of the lobo's mouth before it can tear my head off; somehow, I make it just in time, screwing my eyes shut. Snarling, it scrapes its claws on the ground and its body shudders. For a moment I'm afraid that it'll claw my face off instead. A burst of green, cloudy air bursts from its jaws and I choke, trying to gasp for air and receiving anything but. Before I can try to wriggle free, Light swoops in and kicks it off me.

Coughing, I dizzily struggle onto my hands and knees with a shudder. I'm suddenly overwhelmed by nausea, and if I had anything to throw up, I'm sure it would be out by now. From the corner of my dimmed vision, I see the flutter of a healing spell reach Hope and wash over him, easing his pain, but I can hardly comprehend it, dry heaving and groaning.

"Here."

The heat of a hand spreads across my back like fire and I jerk away, snatching the small glass bottle from the outstretched hand and dumping its contents into my mouth, desperate. Slowly but surely, the misery fades. I wipe the sweat off my face and sink onto my knees, taking greedy breaths of air. Lighting sighs, standing, and Hope eyes his bloody pantleg, frowning.

"That was too much," Light murmurs. I shake my head, squeezing my eyes shut when it makes the world spin.

"N-no, I could've handled it."

"It's too soon."

"I know how to—" I argue, trying to stand. I stumble backward and land on my back, watching the sky spin rapidly.

"Careful," Lightning warns, looking around. "Hope, stay here. I'm going to look around for anything else."

"But what about—"

"I'll be back."

With that, Light leaves us behind. Hope huffs, crossing his arms. I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to stop the spinning. After a long pause, I ease myself upright and watch the lights of the sanctuary go from tripled to doubled to normal. Finally, Hope breaks the silence, letting his knees hit the ground beside me.

"Are you okay?"

"I think so." Embarrassed, I pick at a loose thread in my pants. "Are you?"

"Yeah." He twists his leg around to show me the faint scars on the back of his legs, the only proof of his injury. _Light must have healed him._ "What was that?"

"Must have been some sort of poison."

"And Light gave you the antidote?"

"I guess so."

Hope goes silent once more, resting his hands in his lap and looking around at the strange facility. I sigh, feeling guilt weigh heavy in my chest. Awkwardly, I clear my throat.

"Hey."

"Hm?" He turns back to look at me, frowning.

"I'm sorry about what I said earlier. About Snow and your mom? I didn't mean it, I... I'm just scared that we'll run into Cid and he'll hate me because I'm… like this."

"… Oh." Uncomfortable, he picks at his shoes. Finally, he takes a deep breath and shrugs. "Thanks."

"For what?" I frown, confused.

"For that. It makes a lot more sense."

"What does?"

"Why you're here." He dares to crack the slightest smile. "Why you act like you're a soldier already. It's your brother. You want to make him proud."

"… He was more of a parent to me than either of mine ever were," I huff. "It's not like they didn't try. I didn't listen."

"That's okay."

"They're…" I look up at the dark sky and take a deep breath. "They're probably dead. I know that. But I kinda keep hoping they'll see me on the news somewhere and find me in Palumpolum." I cross my legs and shake my head. "It'd be so much easier to live a few days pretending nothing happened and just… _die_."

"That's not the plan," Hope scoffs. His expression lightens. "But… I get it."

I fall onto my back and cross my arms behind my head, watching the stars shift in their light.

"Do you… think we'll actually make it to Eden?"

"I think so." Hope nods quickly, standing. "We have Light to teach us and you're pretty strong already."

"You're learning fast."

"We'll make it." He nods again, flexing his fingers into fists and releasing them. "Get up. Light's coming." Slowly, I drag myself to my feet, stretching my arms over my head and taking a deep breath.

"Ready?" Light asks, resting her hand on the sheathed hilt of her sword.

"Yeah," I nod.

Without any further hesitations, we head further in, ready to beat down anything that dares to slow us down.


	15. Operation Nora

"Take five," Light commands.

Hope grasps his knees, catching his breath as he falls to the ground. I sit beside him, crossing my legs and watching the leaves overhead course with crackling blue energy. As Lightning watches the monsters below wrestle with each other, Hope flips her knife open and closed, watching the blade reflect the dim light. _Something's bothering him_. Light notices too.

"What's eating you?" she asks, glancing over her shoulder. Hope doesn't answer, frowning. Light huffs, turning to face him. "I can tell you're hung up on something. Is it… the l'Cie thing?"

"L'Cie thing," I repeat under my breath, rolling my eyes. _Oh, that? It's nothing._ Hope still doesn't make an effort to respond, twisting the blade around in his hand and running a gloved finger over its jagged edge to watch it pull at the threads.

"It's Snow, isn't it?" Hope scowls at the ground and Light sighs, coming closer to us. "What happened with him?"

"You wouldn't understand."

"Hope, it's not—" I start. He shakes his head.

"No."

Lightning kneels before us, glancing at me before ducking her head in an effort to catch the boy's eye. He deliberately looks away.

"We're partners, Hope."

"…" He sighs, finally looking up. "My mother was killed… Because of him." He hits the knife against the ground and shakes his head. "It's his fault and he needs to pay for it." He looks at me, determined. "I'm not ready yet, but I will be. Soon."

"Right." I nod. He stands, tucking the knife into his back pocket.

"That's why I followed you," he continues. "Snow dragged us all into this. You and Amarhi, your sister Serah… He's gotta pay."

With that, he keeps moving, not willing to waste another second in his quest for revenge. I stand, dusting my hands off. _He's right,_ I remind myself. If Snow and his little crew hadn't meddled, we wouldn't be here. _We would be dead._ I shake my head and look back at Light. She stares hard at some distant point I can't place, brows pinched together and that omnipresent frown fixed firmly on her face.

"Are you coming?" I ask, aching to keep up with Hope.

"Yeah."

We hurry to catch up, keeping our eyes as sharp as ever. I can't count how lobos and slugs we fight—they're endless. My arms are much sorer than they were before. _I need a break at some point._ I shake my head. _No, that's how you fall behind._ My legs shake under my weight every time we stop and my knees slide forward and back as I try to keep my balance. Just as I look back to give in, Light runs ahead and slashes a branch out of the way. It fizzles away, fading into pure nothing rather than falling as a regular frond would. Hope slows, cocking his head to the side.

"Could I use one of those?"

"They're heavy," I warn, distinctly remembering the first time I dropped Cid's treasured sword onto the ground and chipped away some of the design.

"I can—"

"Bit too heavy for you," Lightning cuts in. Her voice is soft, gentle. She's focused, but she's making room for us. It feels welcoming. This is the least lonely I've felt in years, when, in fact, it's the loneliest I've ever been in my life.

"Okay," he sighs, pulling the knife free from his pocket again and eyeing the jagged edge. _What is it with him and that knife?_ Lightning's eyes glaze over and she watches the light dance across the sharp blade.

"Serah…" She murmurs.

Suddenly, she gets a look on her face and she takes off. Already dreading the shaking of our legs and the stitches in our sides, Hope and I follow, and the sound of our feet pounding against the ground is enough to keep the frag leeches away. When she stops, we do too, uncertain of what she was searching for until we look at the ground. _Soldiers._ A trio of dead men catches my eye and I feel my chest go tight. _What killed them?_

"What happened here?" Hope demands.

"Bad luck."

"Looks like more than just that," I mutter, watching the lights around us reflect off the pools of dark blood.

"They came looking for us and found something worse."

"We can't just leave them like this!" Hope starts toward the first body and Lightning lunges forward to pull him away. I cringe.

"Don't touch anything!" She pulls him so hard that he falls onto his back, startled. My heart starts to pound as I instinctively flinch, my hand reaching to help him up. "Control your emotions," she snaps, looking between the two of us. My arm freezes in the air and my blood runs cold. I shiver. "If you want to survive, you forget about sympathy."

Hope doesn't answer, staring at the ground. I let my arm fall back to my side and gnaw on my cheek, watching the soldier pace. _Is that why Cid cut all contact? He didn't want me to see him like this? Cold and calculated and… not himself?_

"How can I explain?" Lightning paces away, rests her hands on her hips, and takes a deep breath. She turns back suddenly, kneeling before Hope. "Think of it like a strategy. Focus on your ultimate goal and shut out everything else. Still your mind. Move on instinct." She stands, facing the vast expansion of plant life we've left behind us. "Let doubt take over, and despair will cripple you."

Hope stands, nods his head, and looks at me.

"Strategy. Good. I'll take anything to help me get through this."

"Right," I nod. I can't think of apathy like a flaw. It's a survival technique, one that's gotten Light this far. Plenty of people do it, apparently even my brother. If they can, I can too.

"We'll call this… Operation Nora."

"NORA?" Light repeats, confused. Why would he name his tactic after Snow's stupid slogan? _He wouldn't._

"My mother's name."

"Your revenge?"

"Yes." Hope scowls up at her. "Don't tell me. I know getting revenge on him won't… bring her back. I know that!" He stomps a foot on the ground like an insolent toddler. "But 'sorry' won't cut it."

"It's okay," I reassure him, resting a hand on his shoulder to get his attention. "I'm with you. If he'd quit playing the hero, my parents would still be here, too." He nods, turning his gaze to the ground.

"Snow didn't kill anyone's parents. The Sanctum did," Lightning points out.

"Whose side are you on?" Hope shouts.

"The side of truth," she replies, frowning. Hope scoffs, staring down at the knife in his hand.

"Fine. I'll fight the Sanctum with you. I'll learn to survive."

"But Snow's going with them," I add, angry that I had been so wrong before—that I had almost let him get away with it. _He really did do all this…_ Hope turns to head toward the next platform, and for once, I don't wait for Light before I follow.

"What's that button do?" I ask. Lightning starts to speak, but Hope presses it before she can get the words out.

"We're moving!" he cries, hanging onto the podium the button rests on.

"Going up…" I turn my face to the sky. "But to where?"

Before we can reach the stars, the platform stops with a jerk; we nearly topple over. Every fiber of my being itches with anxiety, hesitating to breathe a sigh of relief. Mere moments after, an enormous, vibrant monster leaps from the trees, whistling and chirping like nothing I've ever heard before. Its golden claws are curled in like wheels and its back folds into colorful petals that shape into a bud. On instinct, I pull the weight of my daggers into my hands and watch for any signs of an attack. The creature chatters, ducking its long, slender neck and twisting its head around until it's nearly upside down.

"This is it," Hope says, lifting his chin in a show of forced bravery. "Operation Nora."

With a battle cry and the snap of his boomerang unfolding, Hope rushes toward the creature. Glancing at Lightning, I resign myself to fighting the odd beast, left with little choice. I start by throwing out a fistful of flames, watching them burst forth and lap at the creature's metallic skin. For once, no voice tells me what this oddity is. The monster stomps toward us, shaking the ground enough to knock us off balance. Before we can recover, it ducks its head down and the petals whip around like a propeller, smacking me to the floor ruthlessly. My face stings enough that my eyes water and the sleeve of my shirt hangs by a thread or two, torn from the shoulder down.

Hope pulls me to his feet, wincing at the angry red marks on my skin. When the petals curl back together, the creature shudders and a ripple of fire engulfs the bulb atop its back. Still, it isn't consumed. It stumbles toward Lightning and bats at her with its enormous claws. She blocks the blow, forcing the monster back, but for a moment, I catch a glimpse of fire licking at her blade. _Using it to its advantage…_ My realization dawning, I squeeze my daggers a little harder until my fingers freeze to the handles, numb from the ice.

"Amarhi, look out!"

Ignoring Hope's warning, I run back toward the creature and duck down to the floor when it spins its leaves again. This time, its petals furl back in with a spray of water. _Two can play that game._ My blades shift from frosty patterns to dazzling sparks. Grabbing the edge of its steely neck, I pull myself up and jam my daggers into the top of the bulb. I hardly have time to jump down before the sparks burst and scatter across the monster's skin, causing it to jolt, stuck in place. Quickly, Lightning rushes forth to tear her jagged blade into the beast's skin and Hope continues to pelt it with thunder spells, which is apparently the only thing he can figure out thus far.

The creature turns to ice in an act of defensive desperation. Lightning steps back to catch her breath, and without my weapons, which are still stuck in the back of the monster, I'm forced to stand back and cast spells as quickly as possible. Before anyone can move to protect Light, the creature dives forward, hurls her up into the air, and, with a powerful leap, follows her only to pound her back down into the floor.

"Light!" Hope cries, starting toward her. I grab his arm, watching the monster turn its eyes to us as Light struggles to her feet with a grimace.

"Stay focused!" I command. "It's almost done."

And I'm not wrong. Lightning musters up her strength for a final charge and Hope and I blast a wave of magic toward the staggering creature. Just as it begins to topple, I rush forward, tug my knives free from their sheathes, and bury them into its side. With a final, ear-piercing shriek, the creature's petals wilt and it tumbles over the edge, falling down, down, down into the bottom of the facility.

"Operation Nora, Stage One complete," Hope remarks, staring at the exit the monster was blocking.

"You did well," Lightning says, leading the way outside the facility.

The rising sun casts pale shadows of trees across our faces. I take a deep breath of the fresh air and my chest constricts. _This is the place._ All those days spent running from reality, trying to become my brother, to dream of saving my sister from fate's cruel clutches… It's all coming back. _And no one's coming to bring me home this time._


	16. Underground

"That's it," Hope says, staring out over the inlet. We stand on a tall cliffside, shielding our eyes from the sunlight as is reflects off the water. The outskirts of the city are as ugly as always, marked with the greens and blues of the military. It was always so easy to slip past soldiers who had no fear of danger; now, they're keeping an eye out for l'Cie fugitives.

"Palumpolum," I mutter, longing to see my hometown behind the tall ridge of the mountains that divide the rest of the world from the city.

"That's where you live, right?" Light asks, resting a hand on her hip. Hope steps closer to the edge, eyes aglow with familiarity. "We'll stop in when we get there."

"No." Hope shakes his head. "We're l'Cie now, and no one's there but my dad. Even Amarhi doesn't have anyone." My heart sinks, and for a moment, I forget to be levelheaded like Light taught me.

"Hope, if _my_ dad was alive, I'd do anything see him again," I insist, resting a hand on his back. He shrugs me away.

"You need to let him know what happened," Lightning adds, her voice soft. Empathetic, even.

"We _need_ to move," he corrects, heading down the hill.

We hurry into the woods, winding our way through the trees, over the rocks, and occasionally sliding on dry brush. Hope slows down enough for me to lead the way, and I do so gladly, wandering slightly to the west until I find the shore that lines the forest and leads, in one direction, to Palumpolum. The other direction would take us to the Waterscape. The scent of the woods is more than welcome—I find it odd that after all the anger and sadness and heartbreak I poured into this path, it still feels more welcome than my home ever did. Nature is what I wanted more than skyscrapers and high-end fashion.

"We're getting close," Hope says, lifting his nose into the air. "I can smell the city."

"Yeah, me too."

"Smell the city?" Lightning repeats. Hope shrugs.

"Yeah. I don't know how to describe it."

"Where are _you_ from?" I ask, glancing at Light over my shoulder.

"Bodhum," she answers, looking through the trees to the water. "We don't have as much mud on our beaches."

"Good thing this isn't a beach," I retort, tossing a stone into the water. "Just a path along a bay."

"Is that how you know where to go?" Hope asks. I shrug.

"That, and I'm not stupid enough to go _backwards_ after seeing this from such a high vantage point."

"… Yeah."

"I didn't mean that _you're_ stupid," I add quickly, feeling my face go red. "Just that… You'll figure out someday."

"I won't have to."

"Right…"

We march through the rest of the forest, and as we near the outskirts of the city, I keep my head low and watch the light beams that shoot through the trees morph as Hope steps through them. The trees clear abruptly, and we find ourselves in plain sight of the soldiers that pace the dock. _They've tripled their security._ Light motions for us to run and we sprint toward the nearest cover—a stack of covered crates. Hope kneels, peeking around the edge of the boxes to watch the soldiers gather.

"We can make it," he says in a hushed voice. "Get to the station, and board the train for Eden."

"You think it's still running?" Light asks.

"Well, if it isn't, we'll make it run."

"Then punch straight into the heart of the Sanctum?" Light scoffs. "Now you're thinking like a Pulse l'Cie."

"Well, this is Operation Nora," I tease, nudging Hope with the tip of my shoe. He shakes his head.

"It's not just Snow I'm after. The Sanctum's gotta pay, too." _What about Cid?_ I bite my tongue, but Light still looks back at me. Hope grabs her hand and tugs. "Hey, you're the one who said we had to fight. Every minute we waste, we're tempting fate."

"Look," I interrupt, pointing toward a discrete entrance ahead. I can just barely see it peeking through the untrimmed foliage. "There're some underground tunnels over there. People used to play in them when I was a kid."

"You're still a kid," Light mutters.

"I used to," Hope jumps in. "No one uses that entrance anymore, so not even the army knows about it. We can sneak in under their noses."

"Sounds good." Lightning nods, looking down at him.

"Great! Here we go."

With that, he leads the way forward, running to the next stack of crates. I hang back, waiting for a soldier to pass with my breath held deep in my chest until I feel the time is right. Lightning crosses her arms, watching the guards pace in circles.

"Huh. No more rivalries. PSICOM's brought in the Guardian Corps."

"Recognize anyone?" I ask, peeking around Hope and watching the familiar yellow and white uniforms march by.

"No. Do you?"

"No."

"Good. Let's keep it that way. Who knows what your brother will do when he finds out you're involved in this."

"Honestly, he wouldn't be surprised," I mutter, shaking my head. Hope huffs out a short laugh.

"You're that much of a troublemaker?"

"You would've _hated_ me before all this," I reply, grinning.

"Stay focused," Light butts in. "Where's this entrance?"

"There's an old drainage pipe," Hope says. "We can use it to avoid being seen."

"How do you know that?" I demand, bewildered. He shrugs, smug.

"Dunno. Guess I was one of those kids."

We scurry from crate to crate, keeping our heads low and our feet quiet. Hope runs a little too far and I grab the back of his handkerchief in a desperate attempt to keep him unseen. His abrupt choking sound catches the sound of a nearby guard. I curse under my breath, tugging him along and motioning for Light to retreat. As the guard comes around the side of the box, I panic, searching for anywhere to hide. _Go up._

Taking a deep breath, I release Hope and crawl up on top of the crate, ducking beneath the tarp that covers it. Hope runs after Light, just barely missing the soldier that strolls past. I peek beneath the edge of the cloth, watching him wave his gun back and forth as he searches for the source of the sound. Finally, he mutters something under his breath and walks away. Breathing a sigh of relief, I slip back down to the ground and rejoin the others inside the drainage pipe, where I can finally dust the splinters off my clothes.

"All clear?" Light asks.

"Yeah." I nod, jerking my head toward the tunnel. "Watch your head. I don't remember this being so short." _But they're still a lot taller than me._

Light ducks her head and leads the way through the pipes, keeping her footsteps slow so that the soldiers don't hear us scurrying around like rats in the walls, and we follow suit. Light pours in from grates above our heads and cracks in the concrete. It doesn't look like these pipes have been used for anything in years. Finally, we come to the end of the rusty path and it opens back up to the outside. Quickly, we climb up the steep rock that divides Palumpolum from its outer gates, turning to find a rusted staircase leading the rest of the way up. Even though there's a laid path here, there's not a single soldier in sight. Frowning, I glance back up at the sun to feel its warmth one last time before heading into the underground tunnels. _He used to tell me about this place. Promised we'd play there one day._ My chest constricts and I take a deep breath. _Too late for that now._

"Wow," Hope says, looking around the giant tunnel with awe. "It looks exactly the same."

"Nostalgia?" I ask. He dares to crack a real smile for the first time.

"Yeah. Used to play down here with my friends all the time." He adjusts the band over his brand carefully before looking at me. "Did you ever know anyone named Kai or Elida?"

"No. We were in two different districts, remember?" I shake my head, pausing when the mouth of the tunnel opens into the full underground.

At its very core is a Sanctum fal'Cie, glowing bright enough to illuminate the entire passage. Floating carriers drift all around to carry supplies from one segment to the next, constantly moving. From here, it's easy to see the glow of the exit across the way. Below, immeasurable depths of water splash around, constantly moving to provide the city with fresh water. It looks exactly how it did in my school textbooks, but somehow, being here is a hundred times more magical.

We climb down the side of the entrance to reach the depths of the underground tunnel, faced with a steel path that's lined with dim lights to keep us moving in the right direction. Lightning pauses to look back, staring up at the mouth of the tunnel with her sword ready in her hand. I can't help but smile at her weariness and Hope suppresses a grin, jerking his head toward the path.

"Don't worry, Light, it'll be fine. Only kids like me know about that entrance."

"They'll find it," she insists, coming closer as she keeps an eye on it. "They'll call in a team and canvas the whole tunnel system."

"Then let's get a move on," I cut in, heading toward the end of the walkway. "But he's right; we have time. Even _I_ couldn't find this until now." Light scoffs, shakes her head, and follows.

"Where's this thing come out, anyway?"

"Well, it… I don't really know for sure," Hope admits. I turn to shoot him a pointed look as I wait for a carrier to drift by.

"You mean to tell me you _left_ the city every time you wanted to come here? Must've been a pain."

"There didn't use to be so many guards."

"You got that right," I mutter, peering down into the water below. I point to the fal'Cie. "Automated nutriculture, right?"

"Yeah," he nods. "I think I remember learning about that in school."

"Looks like I remembered _something._ I'm almost disappointed in myself."

Finally, the carrier I was waiting for pauses at the edge and we hop on, slowly drifting to the next piece of the tunnel. _I wish these rotated around the room instead of going back and forth. It would make this a lot faster._ As we step off, the only route we have left passes the fal'Cie. The beams of golden light shooting from its core nearly blind me from time to time, but it's still fascinating to look at.

"What if it can tell we're Pulse fal'Cie?" I murmur. Hope shrugs.

"It probably already can, but what would we want with a food-production fal'Cie?"

"Could starve the city out."

"By cutting all resources?" Light shakes her head. "We wouldn't be able to even if we tried our best. This guy doesn't care what we're up to as long as we leave him alone."

"What's its name, anyway?" I ask, digging for information I know I never learned. As long as Dad denounced it as useless, I didn't care.

"Carbuncle, I think," Hope answers, toying with the fingers of his gloves. "One of our enemies now."

"Even though it provided for us our whole lives," I sigh. "It's like turning against the ones who raised you."

"It's an automated machine, not your parents," Lightning retorts, turning and leading the way in the other direction.

"Why don't we use it as a landmark?" Hope asks, hurrying to keep up. "That way we don't get turned around."

"I'd say that's a good idea, but it's in the _middle_ of the room, Hope," I tease, watching the porcelain arms of the fal'Cie rotate.

The floor alternates between thick green glass and textured metal. The walls, if there are any in certain portions, are lined with rails to aid with the transport of large goods. Tall, greenish monsters wander about aimlessly, but the hard hats secured to their heads cover their eyes and flash with beaming red lights. _Tamed and trained to help humans. Interesting._ The stench surrounding them is almost unbearable, though, so we hurry on, winding through long corridors and waiting for drifting carriers to move us from one point to the next. A long line of locked crates leads to another open circle of glass. Hope walks to its edge, staring at the fal'Cie we've left behind us.

"Look at us: Pulse l'Cie, using a Sanctum fal'Cie to tell us where we're going. Sort of strange," he muses. _Except we haven't used the fal'Cie for reference once…_

"Not really," Lightning argues, looking back at the beaming light. "We've relied on them our whole lives. The food we eat, light and water, it's all from the fal'Cie. You know, I think Cocoon was really built for them."

"Out of self-preservation?" I cross my arms, cocking my head to the side. "They provide us with resources we need to survive, and we provide them with duties and playthings."

"A symbiotic relationship," Light mutters. "I think we're more like leeches. Parasites."

"You think?" Hope wanders closer to the edge, eyes narrowed on our light source. "They protect us, nurture us. They take care of, well, normal people. They treat us like we're special, almost like…" He claps his hands, finally grasping his thought. "Like we're pets!"

"Hm." Something changes in Light's demeanor and I stand back, anxious to see where she's going with this. _We're not cutting off a whole city's food supply. We're after the Sanctum, not the people, right?_ "To them, we _are_ just pets. That's it. Now it makes sense. I've been so blind…" Her hands curl into fists and Hope shoots me confused look.

"Well, it really could be like anything else, too," I interrupt, trying to change the subject. She shakes her head.

"No, he's right. I was born into a fal'Cie world, raised on a fal'Cie leash. It was the only life I knew how to live. When it was taken from me, I was completely lost. Without a master to follow, my life had no purpose." _You are your own master now that you've been cut from your ties._ "Hope, Amarhi, listen to me."

"Okay…" I take a step closer to Hope, uncomfortable under her wild stare.

"This l'Cie curse, it took everything from me. My future. My dreams. I didn't want to think. So I fought instead. As long as I was fighting, nothing else was real. I was running away." _Just like Sazh and Vanille._ "And you… You got swept along with me."

"But Light, I don't understand," Hope says, frowning. Her expression melts away into something defeated, something entirely different from anything we've ever seen from her before. Something _real._

"Operation Nora is over."

"What?" we demand in unison, completely and utterly confused. That bitter feeling of betrayal threatens to choke me yet again, a spiked collar around my neck that threatens to tighten at any moment without warning.

"I…"

"No!" Hope shouts, stomping a foot on the ground before storming toward the soldier. "You told me to fight!"

"I made a mistake!"

"But… You can't do this." Hope draws back, shoulders slumped. "You can't just build something up like that, then abandon us." I take a deep breath to calm myself. Our plan, the resolve that kept our chins up and our bodies moving, is gone. _We'll just have to start over._ But it's never that easy. Is it?

"Listen." Lightning turns and walks toward us, grabbing our shoulders and pushing us together so she can look at us sternly. "Listen to me. I _will not_ abandon you. I won't."

And for some reason, I believe her, nodding. _Even adults get it wrong._ I can't help but think of my parents' faces as they left me behind all those months ago, or how Cid looked the last time I saw him, beaten down and bruised by the weight of the world. _It's harder to lead than it looks._ Hope doesn't say anything, letting his gaze fall away from hers as he waits for her to let us go. And she does, stepping away and glancing back at the fal'Cie.

"We're going to make it," she promises. "We just have to get out of here."

"I can't just throw in the towel," he says under his breath. "How am I just supposed to forget about all this?" I shake my head, starting to follow Light.

"She doesn't want you to. We just need to decide what we're after."

"I'm _after_ revenge," he snaps, pushing past me. I sigh, catching my balance and watching him go. _So moody._

* * *

 **HEY PEEPS! JUST A LITTLE HEADS UP: IF YOU'RE A FAN OF FF TYPE-0/AGITO, I JUST UPLOADED MY NEW STORY FOR IT! STORYLINE W A TWIST IN MOTHER'S PLANS ;) THAT'S ALL HAHA**


	17. Palumpolum

For a while, we walk in tense silence with only the crashing of the water and the low hum of the fal'Cie to fill the air. I hang back by myself, tiptoeing past clusters of flanitors, those smelly tamed monsters, and wonder what our next move should be. Finding direction, I guess, but maybe this time we listen to more than one voice at once. _Easier said than done._

"So what do we do now?" Hope asks, finally breaking the silence. "We're l'Cie! Ticking time bombs. Enemies of Cocoon. If we can't follow the plan, do we just lay down and die?"

"I didn't mean we should give up."

"Then what battles do we fight? And against who? Tell me that!"

"I don't know yet."

"You don't know yet?"

"Hope!" I shout, exasperated. "We're not out of time, so cool it!" Huffing, I hurry toward the two of them. "We can come up with another plan, we can adjust the one we have, and on and on and on. It's not over just because we were _wrong._ "

"So now you're against me too?!"

"No one's against you!" Light snaps. "I don't know who to fight and when, but I do know we can't lose hope." Hope scoffs, turning and sitting on the stairs.

"Hope? There is no hope, not for l'Cie."

"There's you."

"It's my name, not who I am."

"I was just like you," she scoffs, resting a hand on her hip and turning away from us. "My parents died. I had to be strong for Serah, so I thought I needed to forget my past. I became Lightning. I thought that by changing my name, I could change who I was. I was just a kid."

I lean against the rail of the walkway, intrigued by this little look into Light. The real Lightning, not the cold, angry version that's turned her back on the rest of the world. It's strange that something like this whole mess could turn her around and twist her a hundred ways, but that's just what it's doing to me, too.

"Lightning… It flashes bright, then fades away. It can't protect. It only destroys." She turns back and sits beside Hope, resting an elbow on her knee. "Serah tried to tell me, but I wouldn't listen." Suddenly, she leaps back up to her feet, face dawning with realization. "I threatened her. The only one who believed her was Snow…"

"Don't say it!" Hope shouts, enraged at just the sound. "Don't say his name. It brings everything back." _Why was I fighting Snow to begin with?_ I gnaw on my cheek, ashamed. _This was about his wounds all along, not my thirst for blood._ "I keep playing it over in my head, what happened to her. And then I see his stupid face and… and he's _smiling._ How can he smile when she's dead?"

"Hope…"

"I know!" he stands, turning away from Light. "There's nothing I can do about it. I hate knowing that. No matter what happens, she's not coming back! But when I was fighting, there was no time to think about it. It felt good just to give in." He brings his arm up to stare at the brand marring his skin. "But now you start talking about _hope_ …" Lightning tugs on his wristband, covering the brand back up, and he sighs. "I'm sorry. I'm messed up."

"No…" Lightning shakes her head, looking past him at me. "It's my fault." Hope pulls away, looking up at the translucent ceiling of the tunnel that shines in the dimmest section of daylight. Light takes a breath and rests a hand on her hip. "Talk to your dad."

"What? Why?"

"Fighting without hope is no way to live." Lightning turns to lead the way to the exit. "It's just a way to die." Hope sighs and starts to follow. "I want you to find the hope you were named for. Staying alive, I can help you with. But I can't… I can't give you hope. If you go to see your father…"

"You think meeting my dad will make anything better?" he demands. "He's never listened to a word I said. He abandoned us. He's just… he'll never believe all this l'Cie stuff."

"Then we'll make him," I say, throwing an arm around his shoulders. "There's no denying the truth now, not when we're this far in over our heads."

"Maybe…." We go quiet for a long time. "Snow believed Serah, didn't he?"

"Yeah," Light answers, eyes locked far, far away in her memories.

When the elevator brings us to the top, we're completely engulfed in the shadows of the city around us. Lightning draws her sword, letting it flip into the form of her gun as we stay close, on edge. We're in the heart of Palumpolum, but there's no one here. Only a low hum and the sound of the town's speaker system fill the silence. Lightning starts to walk, and we scramble to stick close.

"In a recently convened emergency conference, the Sanctum announced that the fugitive l'Cie have been located. The military plans to apprehend the l'Cie and carry out a public execution."

 _Who did they catch?_ My heart catches in my throat as we wander into the light. _This isn't right._ My palms begin to sweat, and the air feels cold against my arm where my sleeve tore. _We're leaving someone to die?_ Overwhelmed by fear and shock at the news, I look around us, stunned in the familiar surroundings. Ahead, a tall glassy building with enormous screens displays a bumpy, messy video I can't place.

"These images coming to you live from the scene in Palumpolum."

I wish I could just _give_ when I see _us,_ a bird's eye view of the three of us standing at the ready in the town square. _This isn't what we wanted._ Hope gasps, and suddenly, the low hum in the air turns to full out whirring as aircraft dive from the skies toward us. Panicked, I grab my daggers and watch their every move. _Why can't I remember what I'm supposed to do?_ I squeeze my eyes shut. _Because we don't have a plan…_ Before I can even begin to recall my home address, we're surrounded by foot soldiers, airships, and artillery.

"These are the l'Cie," a man says over a ship's speakers. "Show no mercy. These aren't people. They're targets." My stomach twists into a knot. _Is that how Cid would see me now?_ Hope presses his back to Light's, looking to me for any ideas. Before I can speak, Lightning does.

"Start running," she murmurs.

"What?" I whisper back, feeling my heart go haywire inside my chest.

"I'll keep them busy."

"But—!" Hope pulls away, confused and afraid as more and more weapons gather around us. _We're caught._

"You survive."

Slowly, we back away. Hope stares at Light, terrified to leave her side, as I look for any gaps we might escape through. Before either of us can go anywhere, an explosion above our heads rocks the ground, knocking us to our hands and knees. My daggers skitter away across the pavement and I scramble to get them back, deafened by Hope's screams and the sound of gunfire. _What do I do?_

A pair of soldiers falls over the rail guarding the floor above us and I narrowly miss getting crushed. Hope unsteadily drags himself to his feet, and we realize we're blind in all this smoke. Crashing and the sounds of glass shattering come next, and suddenly, the smoke is blown away to reveal a web of ice has either frozen or crushed half the foot soldiers that once surrounded us. I can't find Lightning anywhere, afraid that we've lost her in the chaos. Stepping back, I nearly trip over Hope and grab his wrist tightly in my fumbling.

"Don't let go," I insist.

"What's going on?" he cries, sticking close.

Two bizarre women float above the ice, glittering with ice crystals and twisting together to form some sort of strange… _A motorcycle._

"An Eidolon!" I cry, finally realizing what I'm looking at. Hardly a moment later, my heart leaps into my throat. " _Snow?!"_

"What?!"

But Hope already catches sight of him, the cocky oversized rebel that rides on the backs of the Shiva sisters and glides across the ice like it's a road paved just for him. A woman lands behind him, clutching a gun in her hand and firing at random. I drag Hope out of her line of fire, entirely overwhelmed by what's going on.

I cry out on instinct when someone clutches my hand and pulls me after them, alarmed to see it's Light that's dragging us as she clears a path with her gun. The army pulls its ships from the sky almost immediately and Lightning stops running only to push us down to avoid getting our heads cut off as Snow's motorcycle flies right over us. _Reckless as always._ He screeches to a stop in the center of the wreckage he caused, grinning.

"Lightning!" The woman on the back of the bike hops off, flashing a cocky grin that not even Snow could pull off. Light rolls her eyes at the pair and looks around at the mess. Feeling my palms begin to sweat, I start to let go of Hope, only for Lightning to plant her hands on our backs and shove us toward Snow.

"Hey!" I cry, stumbling. The woman grips my wrists and pulls me back up to my feet.

"Careful there!" she warns. I pause. Something about her voice sounds familiar.

"Take care of them," Lightning commands.

"Lightning, listen to me!" Snow calls, letting Hope fall onto his back.

"Get moving!" the soldier barks back, leaving us behind with her gun propped on her shoulder.

"No, you don't understand!" he argues. "Serah's alright! She'll turn back!"

For a moment, Light pauses and I think she'll turn back to save us from this maniac. But then she keeps going.

"Take care of them," she repeats, refusing to look back. _Was she really that sick of us?_

"Wait!"

"And then there were three," the woman taunts, running after Lightning.

"Gotta go!" Snow announces, dragging Hope to his feet. "Amarhi, in front!"

"Okay…" I turn to see the soldiers on the ground stirring. _Shit_ _._

Quickly, I climb onto the bike and Snow sits in front of Hope, grinning over his shoulder at the boy.

"So, how've you been?"

"Uh…" Hope can't even seem to form words. I hang on tightly to the front of the motorcycle and answer for him, uneasy when Snow's arms sandwich me in so that he can control the bike.

"We've been better."

"Hang on!" he shouts, having not even heard me.

The engine revs and, with a shriek, the motorcycle takes off, spinning in tight circles to take out as many soldiers as possible. After a particularly tight turn, I begin to feel sick and keep my head low. A bump in the road tells me something's not right, and when I look, I realize we've lost a passenger.

"Hope!"

Quickly, the soldiers circle in, aiming readily at him. Before they can shoot, Snow runs them over, using a hand to keep my on board when I start to slip.

"Take cover!" he shouts as a spray of icicles shoots from the back of his bike. "I've got this one!"

I squeeze my eyes shut when he starts doing tight spins in a circle, hanging on so tightly that my knuckles turn white and my fingers go purple. When I take a peek, see the ice drifting up around us, coating the soldiers in a thick layer before exploding and sending them flying in all directions. Snow grabs hold of me and jumps, turning back to wave at the sisters as they fly away. I let myself hit the ground, dizzy. From there, I can see Hope's shoes coming closer. Snow laughs to himself and turns to him.

"What's up?"

"Where have you been?" Hope demands. I cringe at the edge in his voice. _If Snow hadn't… No, that's not true, is it? If we hadn't decided to go to Bodhum, we would've been safe, but then some other poor idiot would be in my place._

"I got taken in," Snow admits, lowering a hand. I take it, trying to catch my breath.

"Wait—what?"

"Not by enemies," he says, correcting our assumptions. "It was the Cavalry, not PSICOM. Leader's name is Raines." I almost choke. "He said he'd lend us l'Cie a hand."

I can't help it. I fall onto the ground, bursting with tears of joy. I don't feel the pain in my knees when they hit the pavement, burying my face in my hands. _Cid… You really haven't left me behind._ Snow pauses to stare, uncertain.

"Whoa, hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing!" I laugh, looking up at them both through bleary vision. "That's the best news I've heard in my _life_!"

"What?" Snow frowns at Hope, looking for an answer.

"Raines is her—"

"Cid's my brother!" I cry, dragging myself to my feet. "And I was looking for him, but I was scared that he was going to be the _enemy_ and that he'd try to _kill_ me but—" I cut myself off, scrubbing at my face as I laugh through my hysteria. _He's okay. We're gonna be okay._

"But why would the army help us?" Hope asks, trying to refocus us. "That doesn't makes sense."

"Military's got all kinds. Not all of 'em like the Sanctum." He jerks a thumb in my direction. "Looks like Raines came from good people." Chuckling, he rests a hand on Hope's shoulder. "Don't worry. I'll handle the bad guys."

"No, _you_ don't worry," I counter, happier than I've ever been in my life. I couldn't care less that this is Hope's mortal enemy. I'm _overjoyed_ at the news he brought me. "We can handle ourselves."

"Well what are we waiting for, then?" he asks, grinning. "Let's get moving."

Still weary from the shock of losing Light, we follow Snow slowly, staring at the twisted walls of ice that engulf the square. _It's all such a mess… But I guess I shouldn't care. This isn't my home anymore._ But, even though I'm hesitant to trust Snow's lead, I'm elated that my brother is on my side, helping the people that were caught in this mess with me to oppose a culture that's gone wrong. The thought makes me forget the pain that was once dragging me down, heavy. _I can't wait to see you again._

Snow rushes in toward the first group of soldiers he sees, shouting to get their attention. Hope and I, for a moment, freeze behind him, confused. He throws up his arms to shield his face, his body taking on a yellowish glow as bullets are repelled back onto the ground once they hit his skin. _Oh._

Taking my chance, I grab hold of my daggers and rush toward the farthest soldier, letting electric bolts crackle from my fingertips and catch my blades. The soldier drops his gun as soon as the sparks strike him, coursing through his body. I rip the first dagger from his stomach, turning out of the way of a spray of bullets from the second soldier so that they kill him comrade instead.

I almost laugh when I launch my dagger at the other soldier, remembering Cid's lectures about keeping my weapon in my hand if it's not designed to come back. The knife buries itself deep in the soldier's chest and he lands on his back, pushed by the momentum of the throw. Hope and Snow take out the third with a burst of spells as I pull the dagger from my enemy's chest. I frown, turning to the two once they're done.

"Are we getting stronger?" I ask, replaying the past few moments in my head.

"Maybe," Snow shrugs, laughing to himself. "Light must've taught you kids well."

"My _brother_ taught me well," I correct, turning back to the skyline. "Let's get out of here."

"Sounds good to me."

We slip up the steep slope of Snow's ice, using it as a ramp to the top of the balcony overlooks the central expanse on the ground. Hope's boots squeak loudly when he slips, and he shouts, startled, when he starts to fall back down. Snow hangs onto an extending offshoot of ice and swings out with an arm, catching Hope's flailing hand just in time.

"Gotcha!" he calls, grinning.

With a grunt, he heaves Hope back up, dropping him onto the balcony and climbing up after him. I grit my teeth and drag myself up on my hands and knees, my stomach feeling like it's being ripped in two. _I really have neglected my core…_ Snow smiles at Hope and he ruffles his hair before running ahead, insistent on leading us. Hope scowls, flattening his hair and shooting me a sour look.

"Why'd we have to get stuck with _him?_ "

"I don't know," I huff, shaking my head and brushing at the water stains on my knees. "Why'd Light leave us behind?"

"Probably to force me to face him," Hope mutters, glaring at Snow's back.

My heart sinks. _Oh, right. That's still what we're doing, isn't it?_ I guess we're not on the same page anymore. How's a group supposed to function when each member's going in a different direction? _I guess we're about to find out._

* * *

 **ANYONE STARTED THE FF7 REMAKE? PLAYED THE FIRST THREE HOURS TODAY AND I MUST SAY, ONCE I GOT OVER THE FACT THAT IT'S MORE THAN FF7 WITH BETTER GRAPHICS, I ACTUALLY LIKED IT. ALSO, I LOVE TIFA'S VOICE ACTOR.**

 **THAT'S ALL HAHA**


	18. Ignorance is Bliss

"You've changed, haven't you?" Snow asks, peering through the cracks in the fence that leads outside. "Seems like you've toughened up."

I lean against the smooth brick wall of the tunnel, eyeing the ice that broke through the walls just down the corridor. _How far did Shiva's impact stretch?_ Hope frowns, and where he might usually play with his gloves nervously, he glowers right back up at the back of Snow's head.

"I'm a l'Cie," he argues. "I had to."

"Huh." Snow laughs to himself. "The only ones who ought to be fighting the army are us dumb grown-ups." I cringe, staring hard at the ground. _And what about the dumb grown-ups who couldn't fight because they had no choice?_

"You think it's stupid to fight?" Hope demands. I shake my head at him but he ignores me, pressing Snow for answers that will only drive his anger.

"It is if you get killed."

"At least then you've tried," I snap, annoyed. "It's better than giving up." My mind's eye flashes back to when Snow gave in, laying on the ground and waiting for his glorious death to come only for Nora to save him and get herself killed. _What a phony._ Snow only laughs again, turning to look back at us.

"Just lay low. Let the dummies duke it out, eh?" He grins, winking. "The army's no match for NORA, right?"

I sigh, shaking my head and wandering in the opposite direction to keep the angry lump in my throat from getting the better of me. _What an ignorant son of a…_ Scoffing to myself, I take a deep breath. _He's just ignorant, Marhi. He doesn't know better…_ But ignorance never equaled innocence, did it? I jump when Snow walks past, scrubbing at my face and turning back to Hope. His face is scarlet and his hands are balled into tight fists at his sides. He's _pissed._

"He was… He was _smiling_!" he hisses, stomping a foot on the ground. I nod, defeated.

"Yeah, he was," I admit. Hope huffs, pulling the survival knife from his pocket. My heart leaps into my throat and I run in front of him, grabbing his shoulders. "Wait! What are you doing?" I demand, forcing him to look me in the eye."

"I'm finishing this."

"No, you're not."

"So you _are_ against me!" he shouts. I shake my head, looking over my shoulder to see if Snow heard. He's as oblivious as ever, wandering along with his muddy trench coat slapping the backs of his holey boots with every step he takes.

"Hope, listen. This isn't the place. If you draw attention to us now, the whole army will be here before you can even _think._ "

"But this might be—"

"There will be other chances, I promise." Desperate, I shake his shoulders and he finally looks at me, his eyes softer than before.

"Fine."

"Thank you," I mutter, letting him go. He tucks the knife away after a moment of sulking and follows after Snow, though he doesn't leave me behind this time.

We catch up just as a beeping sound rings from Snow's pocket. He picks up, resting his free hand on his hip.

"It's me, what's up?" He grunts, startled as he jerks his head away from the device. Frowning, I look at Hope for an explanation. He doesn't look back, scowling at our new leader. "Sorry, slipped my mind." He grins back at us awkwardly. "Great, great! Kids are great, too!" I raise an eyebrow.

"You sound like my dad," I huff. Snow laughs, shaking his head.

"Are you alright?" He jumps again, startled. I can hear an angry woman's voice on the other end. "Oh, hey Sis. What's up?" _Lightning?_ "Rendezvous…" He turns to us. "Hey, don't you guys live here? Is there a place we could meet up with Lightning and Fang?" _Fang… is that the other woman's name?_

"My family's… gone."

"So… no?" Snow presses, not seeming to care about the implications of my words. I roll my eyes, about to bite back when I realize this is the perfect time for Hope to reconnect with his father. I grab his shoulders and push him forward.

"His dad's still around, though. We could meet at their house."

"What? Amarhi, why are you—" Hope starts, protesting. Snow punches Hope's shoulder playfully.

"Nice. Hey, Light? We got a place." He turns back to us. "What's the address?"

"I—" Hope shoots me a look as I hover over his shoulder, eyebrows raised in a silent, fed-up signal.

"Yeah, what is it?" I grit, kneeing his back. He huffs, staring down at the ground.

"Felix Heights, Thirty-Five A," he grumbles. As Snow reports the words back to Lightning, my heart nearly stops. I turn Hope around forcefully and he pushes me away, irritated. "Stop doing that!"

"Sorry, sorry." I shake my head crossing my arms. "Felix Heights?" I repeat, still stunned. "Who the hell are your parents?"

"It's not that expensive," he defends. I scoff, rolling my eyes.

"I beg to differ! We can— _could_ —barely afford to live on the east side down by all that stink water!"

"I…" Hope gives up, shaking his head. "I dunno. My dad's always working, though. Guess that brings enough money in."

"What's he do?" I ask, both bored by our standstill and incredibly intrigued by the newly discovered wealth of Hope's family. He shrugs, leaning against the wall beside me.

"I think an economist or something. He works for the Sanctum."

"Wait, really?" I frown, staring up at the ceiling. "Sounds important."

"I guess." He twists his bandana around his arm over and over again. I begin to worry if it'll rub him raw. "It was always more important than me and Mom."

"Adults are like that," I huff. "Money's always more important than anything else. Even kids."

"Yeah."

"Anyone wanna talk?" Snow asks, holding out the device. Hope hurries forward and snatches it away. Snow raises an eyebrow at me and shrugs, watching Hope wander off by himself to talk to Light.

"He really admires her," I say, trying to clarify. Snow huffs.

"Yeah, I guess. What'd she do to you guys, anyway?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, look at you." He waves a hand in my general direction and I raise an eyebrow, not entirely sure what he means. " _That._ That face looks just like hers." He grins. "Great. We needed more people like her."

"Is that meant to be an insult?"

"What? No, no, I just—" He shakes his head, rubbing the back of his neck. "Sheesh, you and your brother really are similar. You take everything way too seriously."

"When we have to, yeah." I shrug, playing with the torn sleeve of my shirt. "Right now, there's a lot hanging in the balance."

"I guess."

Hope sulks back toward us and hands the device over, defeated.

"It stopped working."

"Probably too many soldiers on their comms right now," Snow answers, tucking it back away. "That's alright. We'll head to your place and wait for them there." He starts to head toward the next set of tunnels before pausing.

"Wait… Where are we going?"

"I'll lead the way," Hope mutters with a soured attitude. I stick close, refusing to get stuck behind with Snow.

"And… you're dad's okay with us coming?"

"How's he supposed to know?" I retort. Snow frowns.

"I don't know—"

"And I don't know if he'll like l'Cie in his house," Hope interrupts. "But we don't really have a choice anymore."

"He's right." I wave for Snow to catch up. "C'mon. We don't want them to beat us there. That's just uncomfortable."

 _~2 years before~_

 _"Cassie, for the last time keep the volume down when you're practicing," my father snaps as my sister comes inside from the garage. She rolls her eyes, pulling her boyfriend, Jay, in after her._

 _"It's a band, Dad. Kind of hard to keep it down."_

 _"Then keep it somewhere else," he replies, reclining in his plush chair and taking a drink from the bottle in his hand. The news plays on the television. Both my parents watch in silence while my dad drinks his nightly beer and my mom folds the clean laundry._

 _"Mom, when is Cid heading back?" I ask, leaning over the back of the couch she sits on. She looks up, thinking as she lifts a blue shirt._

 _"Let me think… I'm pretty sure he's leaving in four days, but there's always the chance he'll be called back early."_

 _"Yeah, yeah," I wave her off. "Four days you said?"_

 _"Yes." She throws the shirt over her shoulder at me. "Give that to your sister, would you? She always tells me not to fold it because the wrinkles are embarrassing." I laugh, hurrying to my bedroom. I reach for the doorknob, pausing when I hear a loud voice. Jay and Cassie are fighting again. Of course. I roll my eyes, waiting impatiently in hallway._

 _"You can't leave me!" Jay bellows._

 _"But I can," Cassie snaps. Something pops twice, sounding like latches. "I can and I will."_

 _"You need me," Jay insists, pleading clear in his voice. "I love you, please don't—"_

 _"No, I don't. I'm done." The door swings open and I pretend I wasn't listening. Cassie doesn't seem to notice me. "Get out of my house. Now."_

 _"Cassie, baby, please—"_

 _"No. Get out!"_

 _Jay huffs, stomping out of the room and throwing open the front door. He slams it so hard that my father's beer bottle rattles off the side table and shatters off the floor. Huffing, Dad stands and shakes his head, tugging his tie off._

 _"Asshole," he grumbles, picking up the shards of glass._

 _"Tell me about it," Cassie snaps, heading back to our room. I throw the shirt at the back of her head, grinning when it drapes over her hair. She rips it off of her head, slamming it to the floor. "Screw off, Marhi."_

 _"Mom told me to give it to you."_

 _"Amarhi," my mom says sternly, giving me the look. You know, the one with raised eyebrows and the downward head tilt that reads "Really?" all too clearly. I huff, flopping into the nearest chair. The back door swings open and in walks Cid, who shrugs off his jacket and tucks his hair behind his ear, revealing the shaved strip along the side of his head, something most higher-ups do in the Guardian Corps, apparently. He pauses upon seeing all our stares, raising an eyebrow._

 _"Yes?"_

 _"Nothing," my mother replies, shaking her head and going back to her folding. "Did you see Jay leave?"_

 _"Yeah, got in his car and sped off. What happened?"_

 _"They broke up for the fourth time," I mutter, kicking my feet up on the table and picking at my fingernails. "Expect a forecast of tears and tantrums before they get back together in two days."_

 _"Amarhi," my mother says again, but her eyes are glued to the screen._

 _"What?"_

 _"Get your feet off the table," my father demands, waving a hand at me. Huffing, I do as I'm told, turning to meet Cid's amused gaze._

 _"When're you gonna find yourself a nice girl I can get along with?" I ask, leaning forward and pressing my elbows into my thighs. "Cassie's too busy with her boy drama and her garage band."_

 _"Haven't thought about it," he shrugs, immediately looking uncomfortable as he leans back against the wall and crosses his arms, feigning interest in the TV._

 _"Oh, come on. You've gotta get yourself a nice girl and have babies so I can be an aunt!" I protest, getting to my feet and skipping over to him._

 _"Yeah? You gonna raise them?"_

 _"Of course!" I scoff as if the answer was obvious._

 _"But if I don't have time how will you? You're not dropping the Corps, are you?"_

 _"No!" I roll my eyes, shoving his shoulder. "I'm not gonna be big news like you, Cid. I'm just going to be like any old soldier."_

 _"I don't think so," he chuckles, ruffling my hair. I bat his hand away, grimacing. "You're never content with being like everyone else."_

 _"I think it'll be a nice change," I reply, sticking my tongue out._

 _Cassie throws open our door, pulling her jacket off the hook to her right and tugging it on quickly. My mother stands, crossing her arms._

 _"Where are you going, young lady?"_

 _"Mom, I have a gig downtown, remember?" Cassie answers sharply._

 _"Don't give me that attitude." There's a long silence where the two women stare each other down before my mom finally sighs, shaking her head. "Be careful, you hear me?"_

 _"Yeah, yeah," Cassie scoffs, rolling her eyes. "I'm not leaving now."_

 _"I know." Mom turns to Dad and nods toward the front door, patting his knee firmly. "We have dinner at our friend's tonight, remember?"_

 _"Bartholomew isn't our friend," he grumbles, standing and straightening his suit jacket. "He's our boss."_

 _"Same difference," Mom brushes him off, grabbing her purse. "We're off, kiddos. Don't kill each other." She points at Cassie, her expression strict. "And you, be careful."_

 _"Yup."_

 _"Get those dishes done," Dad says before closing the door firmly behind them. Cassie sighs, rolling her eyes._

 _"I'll leave that for you two losers."_

 _"Wow, Cassie," I retort, placing my hands on my hips. "You're, like, so cool. I wish I as good at acting like a—"_

 _"Amarhi," Cid interrupts, but he's laughing when he hits my back gently. Cassie ignores us, pulling her long black hair up into a ponytail and checking her reflection in the kitchen window. "How long will you be out?"_

 _"I dunno," she shrugs. "Depends on if they want an encore and how many record labels talk to us after."_

 _"Right."_

 _"Don't be like that," she snorts, striding over and pulling him into a tight hug. "Take care of the brat, yeah?"_

 _"Have I given you a reason not to trust that I will?" he asks, mocking confusion._

 _"Well, sometimes you get lost in your own little world and, you know…"_

 _"Lost in my… I do not," Cid scoffs._

 _"Yeah, you do," I tease, patting his shoulder because I can't quite reach his head. "But it's okay. I can take care of myself." Cassie smiles, pulling me in for a hug, too. "Whoa, calm down, Sis. You're leaving us for, like, six hours."_

 _"I know," she mumbles, holding her hand to the back of my head and squeezing harder. "But I still love you guys."_

 _"Love you, too, I guess," I huff, pushing her away. "But I think I'd love you out of this house more."_

 _"Okay, okay," she laughs, but it's half-hearted. I can't imagine I hurt her feelings… Maybe she's just nervous about tonight._

 _"Break a leg," I call after her as she rushes out the front door._

 _"Love you!"_

 _With that, she slams the door shut and hurries to catch her train to the center of Palumpolum. Cid frowns, but whatever it is that crosses his mind must have been a fleeting thought because he's back to his boring self in mere seconds._

 _"You plan on help me with those dishes?"_

 _"Absolutely not," I reply cheerfully, skipping to the couch and flopping down. I turn the channel to something more interesting and lie down on my stomach._

 _"Yeah, didn't think so," he sighs, rolling his sleeves up and heading to the kitchen._

 _The next morning, I roll out of bed at around nine and get dressed. Cassie's bed is empty. I huff, shaking my head at my reflection as I brush down my short hair. Someone got up bright and early. I walk out into the living room and my mouth waters at the smell of breakfast. In the kitchen, Cid and my mother cook side by side, muttering quick-witted comments back and forth and snickering away like a pair of teenage girls. I clear my throat, crossing my arms and waiting by the island._

 _"Having fun without me?"_

 _"Don't be like that," Mom teases, shaking her head and pushing bacon around in the pan to her left. "How'd you sleep?"_

 _"Fine," I shrug, sitting at a seat and picking at the peel of an orange. "Where's Cassie?" My mother pauses._

 _"She's not in bed?"_

 _"No?"_

 _"I assumed she was sleeping in," Mom frowns, catching Cid's eye. He shrugs._

 _"She probably stayed over at her friend's house. She was out pretty late."_

 _"Probably," she sighs, shaking her head and wiping her hands off on the cloth hanging over the oven. "Amarhi, could you give Jess's house a call?"_

 _"Sure." I stand and head over the living room, taking the phone off the hook by the side table and looking on the paper beside it for Jess's number. Upon seeing the name, I dial her up and wait, watching Cid scramble eggs._

 _"Hello?"_

 _"Hey, Jess," I greet, falling backwards onto the couch and flipping over so that I'm upside down. "It's Cassie's little sister. Mom wants to know if she stayed over last night."_

 _"Uh, no? She's not here."_

 _"No?" I frown, sticking my feet straight up in the air and narrowing my eyes on the ceiling. "Any idea where she went after the show?"_

 _"She said she was going home, so I would assume she's with you guys."_

 _"She never came back though."_

 _"You sure?"_

 _"Jess, we share a room."_

 _"I know, but she could've slept on the couch or something."_

 _"Why would she do that?"_

 _"I don't know!" Jess sighs. "Listen, I don't know where she went. Can I go back to bed now?"_

 _"Yeah, whatever," I scoff, hanging up and twisting around to kneel on the couch. "Mom, she's not there. Jess said Cassie decided to come home."_

 _"Did you ask her what time they were done?"_

 _"No."_

 _"Well…"_

 _I huff, dialing Jess up again._

 _"What?"_

 _"What time did you guys finish?"_

 _"Like, ten."_

 _"Did she meet any cute guys?"_

 _"Goodbye, Amarhi."_

 _"She said ten," I tell Mom. Cid frowns, looking back at me._

 _"You have any idea where she would've gone?"_

 _"What do you think?" I roll my eyes, setting the phone down. "When's the food going to be done?"_

 _"Just a second," Mom replies, her voice soft. She hands the fork in her hand to her son and hurries off to her bedroom._

 _"Well, did she?" Cid asks, picking at a pancake._

 _"What?" I frown._

 _"Meet any cute boys?"_

 _"Dunno, Jess hung up," I shrug. "She was sleeping."_

 _"Most people are."_

 _"Why?"_

 _"It's Sunday."_

 _"But there's so much more you can get done if you wake up earlier," I huff, resting my cheek against the heel of my hand. Even I slept in today._

 _"Maybe she doesn't have anything to get done."_

 _"Maybe she's lazy."_

 _"Or that," he sighs. My mother comes back out, looking anxious. "What's up?"_

 _"Your father doesn't know where she would be either."_

 _"Don't worry about it," I stand, walking back into the kitchen. "My stomach's scarier than anything she could be up to."_

 _I learn to regret those words later._


	19. Vengeance

**SORRY IT'S BEEN SO LONG, I'VE BEEN BUSY WITH THINGS. ALSO, I'M STUCK AT THE PALAMECIA AND I'D RATHER DIE THAN WRITE IT, BUT I'LL POWER THROUGH! I _AM_ VERY EXCITED FOR THE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS JUST BECAUSE I LIKE FLUFFY-ISH THINGS A LITTLE TOO MUCH. ANYWAY, UNTIL THEN, ENJOY.**

* * *

We rush forward as a trio, ducking behind a stack of boxes. Snow leans forward to peek around the corner at the civilians that line the streets with the soldiers that are meant to be evacuating them. Curious, Hope follows suit, his eyes slitting over our familiar surroundings. Snow huffs.

"They don't really believe that become a l'Cie is contagious, do they?" I shake my head. "That doesn't make sense."

"The Sanctum doesn't," he answers, glancing back at me. "But the people panic if _evil_ comes anywhere near them—they don't know any better."

"It's what they're fed." I suddenly remember all the lectures I got as a child about staying away from fal'Cie and about the horrible, horrible dangers of Pulse. _They breathe fear into us for more control._

"The Sanctum follows fal'Cie orders. It's not just after l'Cie," he mutters, pulling his hat back out of his eyes. I watch a family follow orders uncertainly, hanging tightly onto each other's hands as they join their neighbors and friends. "They'll target civilians, and Purge everyone who's a threat."

"And more innocents are killed," Hope says, glaring at the troop that walks past, wielding their guns as an ever-present, silent threat.

"You can't take the blame for that," Snow replies under his breath.

"Someone has to."

"We can still save 'em," Snow insists, turning back to the crowd. "We let loose and bring the army to us."

"Draw their fire?" Hope frowns, nervous. Snow nods.

"I'm supposed to protect you. But I can't let this happen. It's a tough call, that's for sure."

"We can handle ourselves, remember?" I force a smile, reassuring him. He sighs.

"Only one choice, I guess… I try to save everyone." He shoots me a wink, grinning. Hope rolls his eyes, scowling at the ground. "So, you guys with me on this?" He stands, back pressed to the shadows. "You just need to look out for yourself."

A muffled speaker playing warnings of evacuation to the citizens covers the sound of our footsteps as we hurry into the nearest cluster of soldiers. Silently, I run at the closest one's back, slitting his throat and knocking him to the ground before he can make a sound. Snow dispatches the others and, somehow, the other troops scattered around don't seem to notice. We take a flight of stairs up to the next broad square of the city and I take in the smell of the polluted air, the sight of the bright colors, and the sound of the people talking amongst themselves. It almost feels like I'm back in a time before Cid left and Cassie… I shake my head, refocusing. _It's still today, though._

I reach out a hand and run my fingers through the bushy plants that are lined in perfect rows along the walkways, relishing in the feeling as we keep moving, hoping that no one takes notice of us. Quickly, Snow leads the way up a bout of narrow stairs that leads us around a pair of soldiers safely, effectively keeping all attention off us. _Where are we going?_ Hope stumbles on one of the cement tiles that's lifted on the edge; I lift my arm to catch him, gritting my teeth under the force of his weight. Still, I manage to keep him on his feet and keep us unnoticeable in the crowd. Snow takes a sharp turn into an alleyway and we follow, left with little choice. Four soldiers rush at us before we have a chance to hide, recognizing us from the broadcast earlier.

"Look out!" Snow shouts, shoving me behind him and raising his arms to deflect a round of bullets.

Fazed for only half a second, I turn my attention to the soldier behind him and sent a shower of sparks over his head, watching him fall to the ground with the scream and praying that no one could hear that over the sound of the loudspeakers. Braver by the minute, Hope throws his boomerang at another soldier and I take his moment of distraction to jump in and dig my dagger through the gap between his armor and his helmet. When I step away, the spray of the blood that releases makes me _sick._

Snow cringes at the sight and quickly turns to lead the way down a curved, dark staircase that leads to the lower level of the street. We stumble to a sudden stop upon seeing an enormous crowd gathering, having been corralled by the guards and left there to wait. I start to suggest that we keep our heads low and mingle to blend in, but a young girl suddenly whips her head around, eyes wide, and her sharp gasp catching the attention of her mother as she stares at us. In her hands, she clutches a dingy stuffed Carbuncle doll.

"Not good," Snow mutters.

"What's not—" I start, wondering if she recognizes us. Snow doesn't hear me, running straight on into the crowd. "What are you doing?!" I demand, panicked. Hope grabs my hand and drags me after him, giving chase. My heart feels ice cold as it pounds in my chest, echoing my spike in fear. We stop just as suddenly as we started, and, peeking past Hope's head, I realize it's because a soldier is coming right at us.

"Is there a problem?" he demands, clutching his gleaming gun like a lifeline. Snow gets a look in his eye that makes my stomach churn. _No…_ "Now why don't you just calm—"

Before the solider can get his words out, Snow's fist collides with his helmet and his back slams onto the ground. I have to force myself not to reach for my knives, unconsciously crushing Hope's hand in mine. The crowd's screams and gasps of shock feel like daggers in my heart and I squeeze my eyes shut. _I don't want to be a monster…_

"Don't—" Hope whispers. I open my eyes just in time to see Snow lift the soldier's gun above his head and fire into the sky.

"I am a Pulse l'Cie!" he shouts over the sound of gunfire. "I'm here to kill you all!"

"Stop!" I scream, but my pleading falls on deaf ears. "This won't help anything!"

"It's too late," Hope answers, shaking his head. He looks back at me, bitter. "He's trying to save them all from the Sanctum."

"But if we hadn't gotten involved—"

"I know."

The crowd scatters, screaming and crying and running for cover. Left with little choice, we run back to Snow, who throws the empty gun on the ground with a look of defeat.

"Had to clear the area," Snow explains, watching hoards of families run for safety. Hardly a second after the citizens run, bullets rain down from above and guards we bypassed earlier rush toward us. "Move!" Snow grabs hold of our arms and drags us to cover. "They'll open fire on a crowd. Doesn't matter who dies. Just wipe 'em _all_ out!"

"There's so many of them…" Hope watches a group of aerial soldiers soar past. "Are they really that afraid of us?"

"Weren't _you_ that afraid of us?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. He frowns. "It's how we were trained to think."

Quickly, we duck our heads and make a run for it, heading down the nearest alleyway in search of safety from the scanners and prying eyes of soldiers. Once we can't hear their guns clearly anymore, we slow down. I look up to see a colorful archway that introduces the name of the shopping mall. _I've never even been here before._ I huff, looking around at the sheer size of the buildings. _Then again, I never spent much time on this side of town._

Snow runs ahead toward a crashed bike not unlike the ones we rode into the Pulse Vestige just a few days ago. My heart nearly leaps out of my throat when I hear a whimper to my right and see the Carbuncle girl curled up on the ground, clutching her doll as she trembles in terror. Hopes starts toward her carefully.

"Hey…" He reaches out an arm and she scoots away, sobbing. "You okay?"

I turn to see something that I might find funny if it wasn't real. "Hope…" A mob wielding brooms and shards of metal and debris creeps toward us, angry and afraid. _The worst kind._

"Leave me alone!" she screams, throwing her doll at Hope.

"L'Cie scum!"

"Save the girl!"

"Call the army!"

"We can take 'em!"

As we watch the crowd come closer, the girl sees her chance and shoves Hope to the ground, smacking at me blindly as she runs past to find her mother. Her doll remains on the ground beside him. Snow huffs, coming back toward us.

"You better run, l'Cie scum!" a man shouts, coming closer than the others dare.

Snow stands in front of us, hatred clear in his eyes. But it isn't hatred for the people—it's hatred for what he has to do. Slowly, I take hold of Hope's arm and help pull him to his feet. Snow raises his arm, showing the blue glow of his brand. Suddenly, he pulls his hand back, forming a bright, spinning ball of light before hurling it upward at the arch. The ground shakes as it tumbles down, blocking the mob's path to us.

"That was magic! We don't stand a chance!" cries a woman.

"We don't stand a chance. We can't fight _that!"_

Hope lifts the doll off the ground and sets it on the fallen rubble, murmuring an apology. Snow taps my arm to get my attention and hangs on to a jetpack a soldier dropped when he died. The sound of gunfire draws my attention back, but Snow throws me over his back and hangs onto Hope like he's weightless, flying us into the rooftops. A bullet dings off the side of the pack and I shield my face, clinging to Snow's coat with a grip that turns my knuckles white. When he tries to steer us away from a set of telephone wires, he crashes us into a wall. Hope screams, dangling helplessly.

We just barely make it over the glass lip of the roof before the jetpack gives out, smoking. It throws us to the ground, skittering across the pavement and tumbling over the edge of the building. I grit my teeth as my hands and knees skid across the rough pavement. The blinding pain in my shins renders my useless as I lie on the ground, wishing more than anything that I could just stay there and _cry._ When the unbearable ache begins to fade, I drag myself to my feet, happy to see that my pants haven't ripped yet. Hope stays on his knees, clutching his side and gasping for air. _Must've landed on his stomach._ Snow heads toward him, leaning over to rest a hand on his shoulder.

"We've gotta stay ahead of 'em." He straightens, staring out at the skyline as the sun starts to disappear. "We walk from here."

Suddenly, my absolute exhaustion begins to dig its fangs into my spirits and I stumble in my steps, feeling week. _It's been days…_ Hope gets to his feet somehow, and when his eyes meet mine, they reflect the same tiredness. I just want a good night's sleep more than _anything._ Gone is the adrenaline from the initial branding, the hope from our newfound direction, and the euphoria of knowing Cid is on our side. I'm too tired to care anymore. _But that's how people die, Marhi._

"Time's a-tickin'!" Snow calls over his shoulder, hurrying across the rooftop without any reservations.

"Let's go," I huff, my legs numb as I run after him.

It feels as though I've run a marathon already; my muscles feel like jelly and my bones ache _horribly._ To make matters worse, I can't unsee the face of that little girl or jeering of the crowd. _We really are monsters._ Snow slows down at the edge of the roof, eyeing a distant billboard. Hope takes the opportunity to let his legs give way. He sits down, leaning back on his hands and staring at the mess of a city. A mess _we_ made.

"Felix Heights is that way, right?" Snow asks, pointing at the buildings past the billboards. Hope doesn't answer, so I nod, falling onto the ground next to my grumpy companion. It feels so _good_ to let my legs rest. "Still _pretty_ far. 'A great place for family living'," he reads, resting his hands on his hips. "So they say. Looks like it might actually be, huh?" I scoff, shaking my head. _A great place to raise spoiled brats._

"Yeah, well, l'Cie don't have family," Hope mumbles, crossing his legs. Snow turns back to face us.

"Listen to me, kid." He wanders toward us until he can stoop down to our level. "I'm an orphan—I barely got to know my family." _That's better than knowing them and losing them…_ I wince at the pain in my chest, busying myself with relacing my boots. "But someday, I'm gonna have my own, once I save Serah and protect Cocoon." Hope scoffs, glaring up at him.

"How exactly?"

"That's a good question," Snow replies, laughing softly. He stands, wandering away. "I wanna do what's right, but everyone hates l'Cie. Kind of hard to help someone that's trying to kill you." He rests his hands on his hips and faces us. "It'll be tough, _but_ everything will work out in the end—as long as we stay together and hold onto hope—"

"We don't have any!" Hope cries, leaping to his feet. "A l'Cie's only hope is a quick death!"

I stare up at them nervously, scared that Hope might decide this is his chance. I only get up when the billboard Snow studied in the distance explodes, poked full of bullet holes as the aerial troops speed past. _Well what the heck was_ _ **that**_ _for?_ Hope hurries past Snow, grumbling under his breath as he climbs down from the top of the building to avoid being seen. Snow follows, shooting me a frown. Caught in the middle, I take a deep breath and force myself to keep up, wishing I could run off on my own to sort all this out without a whiny little boy and a delusional romantic.

We make it to the underside of the building's edge just as the troops fly past, barely missing getting our heads blown off by the trigger-happy soldiers. Determined to make it to Felix Heights before we either die or run out of steam, I lead the way, keeping a close eye on Hope. _Babysitting is exhausting. No wonder Light almost left us behind._ Climbing along rafters and balancing on pipes, we make our way through the shadows, avoiding the plethora of velocycles and aerial troops. I nearly slip once or twice, managing to catch myself just before taking a rumble. Neither of them bothers to try to catch me. _That's reassuring._

I roll my eyes and turn the corner to my left, finally reaching the safe ground of another flat, shaded rooftop. When I slow my steps, Snow walks past me, determined to get a move on. Hope has other plans, stopping altogether beside me. He clears his throat, his eyes filled with fierce determination.

"I wanted to ask you something," he says, staring hard at Snow's back. Snow sighs, turning back to face him.

"What's that?"

"You say you want a family," Hope starts, his eyes narrowing. My stomach does a backflip. _Oh gods… this is it, isn't it?_ "What if—what if they were taken from you?"

"Well, then I'd take 'em back," Snow grins, raising a fist. Hope shakes his head.

"And what if you couldn't? What if you knew who was to blame?"

"Hope—" I murmur, uneasy.

"Well, then there'd be trouble," Snow answers, placing his hands on his hips. He chuckles to himself, still not quite catching Hope's serious tone. _Or he's uncomfortable with it…_ My reading proves true when his smile fades and he frowns, genuine. "Hey, are you okay?" Hope doesn't answer, so Snow leans forward, trying to catch his eye. "Did you get hit in the head or something, or…"

The ground begins to shake beneath our feet, and to our horror, a Sanctum weapon the size of the building we stand upon hovers over us, flapping its metallic wings, though something tells me it doesn't need them to fly.

"We'll have to talk about this later!" Snow shouts over the wind, stepping back.

Hope huffs, shoving him aside. "Don't just stand there!"

"Hope, wait!" I call, hurrying after him when he rushes at the warcraft alone.

A burst of missiles is the first thing it throws at us. Hope throws up his hands and a green, glittering shield of magic blocks them. He grits his teeth under the weight of their explosions, but in the end, we're unharmed. _We're getting stronger._ I look from Hope to the giant… _thing,_ wishing I had a name for its twisted crimson limbs that curl back into strange loops around a glass hull at the top. _What is this_ _ **design?**_ Cid would mock whoever dreamed _this_ nightmare up.

"Hit it with lightning!" I call, but my voice is drowned out by the sound of more artillery firing at Snow's braced arms. Hope frowns, throwing out another fire spell.

"What?" he shouts back.

"Lightning!"

"Lightning? Where?" Snow demands, turning his head sharply in search of the soldier. The machine takes the chance to smack him to the ground. I roll my eyes, letting sparks crackle down the length of my daggers just in case I can get close enough.

" _Electrocute the shit out of it!"_

" _Oh!"_ Snow rolls to his feet, pausing to frown at me. "Hey, watch your mouth, kid!"

"I have a _name_!"

I roll under the second wave of missiles, letting a half dozen thunder spells loose on the machine. It shudders, but it hardly seems affected. _This has to be it, right?_ The slightest glimmer of a golden shield gives me hope. Our attacks aren't weak, they're just being absorbed. I wait for Snow to run toward the bottom of the hovering war machine to race around the back, swinging myself up onto its jagged rungs of crimson metal.

Using my momentum, I hurl myself forward and catch myself on the back of its command center by burying my daggers into its shell-like climbing picks. It jolts with the wave of electricity that bypasses its defenses. After catching my balance, I kick off the back and slide down, using the buried knives to slow my momentum as they tear cleanly through the sheet metal.

"Get off it!" Snow shouts, nearing Hope.

"Gimmie a sec!" I huff, irritated. "No one trusts me," I add to myself, diving back behind Hope's barrier just before a big burst of explosives goes off. "Hit it!"

Hope cuts the shield to bring a storm's worth of lightning down over the machine's head. It stutters, its wings wilting like the petals of a flower in overwhelming heat. Another round from the two of us sends it soaring back into the air, making its retreat. Snow laughs, throwing a fist into the air.

"Aw, yeah!" he cries, excited to see a victory that _I_ conducted.

I sigh, rubbing at my sore arms and turning back to the two standing behind me. Hope clutches his knees, trying to catch his breath. Thankfully, Snow catches on and points toward a walled-off landing that would hide us from anyone that wasn't already there.

"If you need to take a break, why don't we do it over there?"

Slowly, we head through the doorway to the balcony overlooking the city, staying close to the walls. Snow laughs upon seeing a row of vending machines, banging on one until a can rolls out. He holds it out to Hope.

"Here."

"I'm not thirsty," Hope replies sharply. Snow raises an eyebrow at me and I shake my head.

"I don't drink those."

"O _kay_ ," he answers, confused. "Not the time to be picky, is it?"

"I don't drink them," I repeat, eyeing the sugary drink in his hand. I almost feel guilty, knowing that he beat that out of a machine just for us to lighten the mood. _He's trying his best._ I look toward the ground, trying to fight the ache in my chest.

"Well, don't want to waste it," he mutters, wandering toward the railing and rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. He cracks the can open, chugging the drink down quickly. _Must be nice and cold._ Still, I can't help but hear Cid's chiding voice in the back of my head. _Fill yourself with trash and that's all you'll be. Gee, thanks_. I glance over at Hope to see him staring hard at the railing. Suddenly, he shakes his head, squeezing his hands together.

"I can't…" He looks up at Snow, his eyes gleaming with tears he's suppressed for so long. _Don't do it._ "Snow? What do you plan to do? I need to know." Snow belches and I cringe. _**Not**_ _the time._

"I told you. Save Serah, protect Cocoon, and have myself a big, happy family. Still, it's a long road ahead." He raises his arm, looking down at his brand. "Or, maybe not so long. Whatever happens, things will work themselves out. Even if you're l'Cie, you've got to keep fighting."

He throws the can toward the trashcans along the other wall, making it in easily with a fist pump to celebrate. My stomach starts to ache from being tied up so tightly. Hope steps forward, demanding answers from his rival.

"And what if that gets people around you involved?" He walks toward Snow, watching as realization starts to dawn in the towering man's eyes. "What happens when your actions end up ruining someone's life? What if someone _dies?_ What then, Snow?!"

Snow backs into the railing, stuttering. His eyes are wide, searching the empty space for any explanation other than what's come to his mind. _Has he realized who Hope is yet?_ I bite down on my tongue, wishing I could speak, but I know this has to happen.

"How do you pay for what you've done?" Hope demands. Snow turns and slams his hands down on the railing.

"I can't, alright?!" he shouts, startling me. "There is _nothing_ that can make something like that right again. When someone's dead, when someone's _gone,_ words are useless."

"So that's it? People die and you just _run away?_ "

"I know! It's all my fault!" Snow kicks at the railing and I squeeze my eyes shut. _Stop fighting._ "But I don't know how to fix it! Where do you start? What do you say? All I can do is go forward. Keeping fighting and surviving, until I find the answers I—"

" _There are no answers!"_ Hope shouts. "You're running from what you deserve!"

"Well, why don't you tell me what I deserve?!" Snow demands.

"The same fate!"

The air around Hope begins to shimmer and my heart begins to pound louder than before. _Please be careful. I can't fight an army with two dead guys at my back._ Shuddering, I begin to wonder if this is my fault. Maybe they don't _have_ to talk now, not if Hope can't handle it.

"Hope, wait," I start, hurrying to grab him arm.

He shakes me off, angry past the point of reason. The light gathering around him bursts into an explosion of flames, slamming me into the wall and knocking the breath from my lungs. Snow goes tumbling over the edge of the balcony, managing to hang on with just his fingers gripping the concrete edge. _Help him…_ I wheeze, trying to think past the pain, but nothing comes. Hope grabs hold of the knife Light gave him and walks toward the edge. Through bleary vision, I try to see what he's doing. Even though the tears that sting my eyes from the smoke, I know what Hope's after. It's not what he needs. _Stop._

"Nora Estheim…" He glares down at Snow. "She was my mother. And she died because of _you_!"

"You!" Snow cries. "You're the one she meant!"

Hope screams, raising the knife over his head. I clutch my aching stomach, stumbling toward the edge to stop Hope from exacting revenge he'll always regret. The pain in my bones is enough to knock me to my hands and knees. _What's wrong with me?_ Before I can recover, I see a flash of light and feel the overwhelming heat of the fire behind me as the missiles hit the wall, breaking the entire balcony into a hundred pieces. I soar forward, hands flailing for anything. My palms skid across the concrete and I slide over the edge only to crash headfirst into a pipe connecting two buildings and crash into the waves of darkness that swallow me whole.


End file.
